Page 71 of Storm of Blood and Shadow

“So even if it kills him, you’ll learn something,” I say dryly. “What a compassionate point of view.”

Thelise rolls her eyes. “I’m trying to help you, love. The way I see it, you owe me for making him a handsome fuckingtreatin human form. Listen, if I could predict the outcome of this, I would. But there’s no precedent for a dragon swallowing a sentient magical storm—no charm or spell I can weave to help him control it. That’s something he needs to figure out himself.”

She turns to Varex. “One thing you should keep in mind—this storm is evil. It prides itself on destruction and it feeds off misery. When it tries to escape or conquer you, it will use your vulnerable points—longstanding resentment, gnawing pain, poisonous guilt, anything that has infested your consciousness for years. It will use that as a foothold.”

Varex shifts uncomfortably. “How do I defend against that?”

“The only way is to eliminate the foothold. Release the resentment, replace the pain with joy or pleasure, root out the guilt and let it go. It’s not enough to cope with the ruinous parts of yourself—you must purge them.” She vents a low, bitter laugh. “If I knew how to do it, I would tell you. But it’s something I’m still working on myself. And I suspect it’s different for everyone. Forgiveness or vengeance—who can tell which is best? I knowpeople who chose each of those paths and found a satisfying peace at the end.”

Varex growls, unsettled. “I still do not believe Jessiva should accompany me.”

“She may be of help with this,” Thelise says. “Having someone who cares for you is one of the best ways to defend against an evil influence. A heartfelt conversation can unlock depths of yourself that you never understood. A good hard fuck can drive away the darkness for a while, but when you experience pleasure with someone who genuinely adores you—that’s a special kind of healing.”

Varex chuffs a hot breath, looking at me out of the corner of one amber eye. He doesn’t protest any further, so I say firmly, “I’m going.”

“Good.” Thelise shakes herself and tosses back her hair. “I’m glad that’s settled. There’s been far too much serious talk today, and I can’t bear it. Carry me away, Ash, will you? There’s a good dragon.”

“We’ll head for the Twin Fangs,” says Varex to Ashvelon. “Don’t tell the clan what’s wrong with me, I beg you. And if Kyreagan returns before I do, tell him I went hunting or surveying or something.”

“We’ll concoct a good solid lie,” Thelise replies, and Ashvelon bows his great head in confirmation.

“Fly safely, my prince,” he says. “Do not worry for the clan. You have sacrificed your own health and stability for the good of all. Take the time you need to recover. I have every confidence you will return to us stronger than ever.”

“Your words give me hope,” Varex replies, his voice tight with emotion.

Ashvelon and Thelise depart, leaving Varex and I alone in the uneasy silence. Things are not right between us, and I don’t like the feeling, but I don’t know how to fix it, either.

“Pack up anything you want to bring,” Varex says curtly. “Then get on my back.”

I stuff a few things in my bag, including soap and some cloths I took from the supplies that were parceled out among the women before the storm—supplies Thelise brought with her from the mainland. In one cloth I wrap up the remaining fish I cooked. The necklaces Varex gave me are still in my bag, along with the gold coins.

As an afterthought, I add a pair of pants, also scavenged from the things Thelise brought with her. They don’t fit Varex well, so he has only worn them occasionally, but he might need them.

As I settle onto the dragon’s back, he says, “I want you to know that I would take you back to the Elekstan capital if I could. But Rahzien’s theft of the Princess is an act of war against us, and any dragon flying too near that city could be in danger from Vohrain. My presence there could also jeopardize Kyreagan’s efforts to reclaim Serylla.”

“Not to mention the fact that you might vomit out the Mordvorren at any moment,” I say dryly.

“Then you understand why I can’t take you home.”

“I understand that you always have a list of viable reasons why I should stay with you.”

“I’m not making you stay with me now,” he counters. His body surges as he takes off from the cave entrance, sailing into the golden light of the afternoon. “I said you should remain on Ouroskelle. You’re choosing this.”

“I’m choosing you.”

He doesn’t reply, but his body shudders beneath me, and for a moment, I see a fiery glow from within him, shining between each of his scales, lighting the edges with red and gold. It’s a terrifying effect, one I’ve never seen before. He’s changing physically, and it frightens me.

The unfamiliar magic must scare him too, because his breathing quickens and his huge heart thumps faster. I can feel it beating deep inside his body.

Holding onto one of his spikes, I place my hand alongside his neck, near the wound he gave himself for my sake.

“Whatever happens, I’ll be there,” I tell him. “I’ll be with you.”

21

The island I’ve chosen is one of a pair. Ages ago, there used to be one great mountain in this spot, but it split in two right down the center. Over time, the channel between the two halves of the mountain widened as the sea flowed between them. Now the islands are twins, each owning half of the mountain, their sheer brown cliffs facing each other across a foaming channel. The one I selected, East Fang, possesses a source of fresh water, a spring bubbling from the forested slope of its half of the mountain.

I circle the island several times, diving low to inspect its beaches and tidepools. Beyond the beaches it is thickly forested, and I can’t see very far into the wall of trunks, vines, and undergrowth. There never used to be much prey on these islands—some nesting sea-birds, some large lizards, a few harmless snakes—so my clan doesn’t visit often. I’ve flown over the Twin Fangs, but I’ve never landed here.

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