Page 77 of Just Say Yes

His friendship with Trent, a relationship he trusted and valued, had changed because of me. Guilt slicked like motor oil in my stomach, and I felt sick. Logan was accustomed to being used, and I had lined up to do the same, just like all the others.

I shook my head. “You don’t have to justify your friendship.”

“No.” He shook his head in return. “I think maybe I do.” He looked angry. “Please stay.Talkto me.”

My chin wobbled. He was the last person I wanted to know what had happened. It made me feel weak, used, and shameful. I pulled the duffel from my shoulder and let it plop to the ground.

His eyes were lost and confused.

“What do you want to know?” I finally asked.

“Only what you’re willing to tell me. Help me understand what happened and why you’re holding on to it so tightly.”

I circled him and entered the kitchen to get cold water. Somehow standing behind the kitchen island helped me feel protected. The cold water did little to soothe my parched throat, but when I set the glass onto the granite countertop, I sighed.

“Trent and I met a few years ago when he was in Outtatowner for some bachelor party bar-crawl thing.” It was then I realized that Logan could have been there. I shook away the thought. No way in hell I wouldn’t have noticedhim.

“Probably Randy’s. I didn’t go because I was playing,” Logan offered.

“He hit on me at the Grudge and”—I sighed again and let my hands drop against my thighs—“I was charmed. He was older, attractive. Funny and attentive—knew all the right things to say to make me feel special. We hung out that night and exchanged numbers. He lived a few towns over, so we started texting.” I let the memories of those early days wash over me. To be fair, it had been fun and exciting to feel like the center of someone’s universe.

“He would send flowers and sweet littlegood morningtexts. We got together on weekends, always in my hometown. I started asking about meeting his friends, and it was always some excuse:Mav’s traveling, Randy has work, next Saturday is guys’ night out.I was so naive that it never dawned on me that he might be hiding me. I had dated before but never anything that felt like it could become serious. Our relationship felt so grown up and full of promise.”

Logan shrugged. “He was into you. I get it.”

A bitter laugh shot through me. “For months, he made me feel seen—special. I clung to his sweet words, the little gestures that made me believe I’d finally found someone who wanted me for me. And then, in one careless moment, he shattered it all. He wasso into methat when we finally had sex, he left before I even had my pants on and never called again.”

Logan shook his head. “Julep, that’s ...” He dragged a hand across his face.

Once I started, it felt like I couldn’t stop. I needed to get it all out. “I tried for months and months. Calls, texts, driving past his work, circling his hometown in my car. I felt like I was losing my mind. Finally, I realized that what I thought we had never existed. And whatever made-up relationship I thought we had ended because ofme.”

“You?” His face twisted, like he didn’t understand how it could possibly be my fault.

I flattened him with a look.Was he really going to make me say it?

I clenched my jaw. “Yes, me.” I let out a wry chuckle. “I’m not really the girl that gets the fairy-tale ending. I’m not the main character—I’m the kind-of-funny sidekick. The best friend. The cutesy little sister.”

Logan tried to interrupt, but I lifted my hand and barreled on. “It’s fine. I’ve accepted it. I learned a very valuable, but hard, lesson that day.”

His jaw ticced. “Fuck, that’s—” Logan sighed. “I’m so sorry he?—”

I gestured in his direction. “Please do not apologize for him.”

A frustrated growl tore through Logan as he paced. “Well, what do you want me to do? Because right now the only thing I want to do is find him and tear his head from his shoulders. He’s my oldest friend, and I can’t stop thinking about how I could fuckingkillhim for what he did to you.”

Logan’s fists clenched, his knuckles white. The anger in his voice wasn’t aimed at me, but it still startled me. He wasn’t just angry—he was furious on my behalf. I wasn’t used to this, someone fighting for me instead of against me. It scared me almost as much as it comforted me.

“It wasmyfault!” I shouted through angry, frustrated tears. “He knew I was inexperienced, but I didn’t tell him the whole truth. I was too shy and embarrassed to admit that I had never had sex. He didn’t know until afterward, when I had bled on the bedsheets. Then, he told me I needed to clean up my mess.”

His voice rose. “It shouldn’t matter if it was your first time or your fortieth. He knew and you deserved better. None of that is your fault.”

Shocked, I looked at Logan. “He told you that he knew?”

A muscle in his jaw flexed. “Just tonight ... based on what Trent said, he knew.”

I shook my head. “It doesn’t matter. Iwantedto get it over with. I used him just as much as he used me. But he was smarter—he played the game and came out on top.”

“He was cruel. And an asshole. Friend or not, he was wrong for how he treated you.”

---