Page 22 of Casualties

Jackson comes from a very wealthy family that resides in Boise.He's lived here his entire life, and got scouted from high school to attend BSU.His dad made sure he accepted their offer, so he could stay close to home and continue to help with their family business.

"Is it like a company your dad owns?"I ask curiously.

"Eh.It's boring finance stuff.So, Copeland is your brother?"Woah, that was a quick subject change.But it's only the second time we've hung out.If he doesn't want to talk about it, we don't have to.

He tells me he's an only child, but always had a lot of friends, so the lack of siblings never bothered him.That's why he loves playing football so much—not just that he is good at it, but he enjoys the team camaraderie.Having brothers on the field that have his back is close enough to siblings for him.I may not have a clue about football or sports in general, but listening to him talk so passionately about something he loves is endearing.

I'm enjoying spending time with him and getting to know him better.I know we just met, but it feels like we have been long-time friends.Even if we never date or get closer romantically, I hope we continue to build a friendship.

We stop for a brief moment so he can tie his shoe that came loose.I put my hands in my pockets and remember the candy I grabbed from the bowl at the pizza place.Good.If he does decide to kiss me, I really don’t want pepperoni breath.I slide a vanilla Tootsie Roll in my mouth—they're my favorite.A sudden loud car engine startles me, and I inhale the Tootsie Roll making me cough vigorously.Jackson’s at my back in a flash, patting hard to prevent me from further choking.

This is the most embarrassing moment of my life.Well not the most embarrassing, but pretty freakin’ close.I finally start to catch my breath, covering my face with my hands.

Seriously, just kill me now.Give me a quick death to avoid this.

When he realizes I’m okay, he lets out a soft laugh.“Shit, Toots, you have to be careful with those.I almost gave you the Heimlich Maneuver.”He's still laughing as I lightly slap his arm.I'm sure my face is beet red at the moment.

“Toots?”I raise an eyebrow at the nickname.

“Only fitting I call you Toots with the pocketful you swiped from the restaurant, then you almost die from inhaling one.”He holds out his hand for me to give him one.

“They’re my favorite, so when I saw the bowl I had to grab some.My only rule is they have to be vanilla.”He's trying hard to stifle his laughter, which causes me to laugh at myself.The Tootsie Rolls I grabbed give me a sense of home—my dad always had a stash for us.When I would ask for one before dinner my mom would say no, but my dad would pull me aside and hand me one while holding his pointer finger to his lips, letting me know to keep quiet.

We walk a full circle around campus and back to the dorms.We stand at the main door not saying a word, maintaining steady eye contact.There is no liquid courage flowing through my body—the first move will have to be on him.He must know that as he moves in close to me, my chest pressing against him.

“Ainsley, I like you a lot, and I hope I’m reading you correctly to say that you like me too?”he asks, then waits to gauge my response.I nod my head yes.Tonight has been a lot of fun, and I really want him to kiss me, but I think he has more to say.“So like I said, I like you, but I need to know if you have anything going on with Maddox?I know he is close friends with your brother, so I am sure you all grew up together.I get that, but last night was not your brother’s friend looking out for you.Last night was a jealous man trying to claim his territory.Is there anything going on with you two?”He's still close to me, but pulls back to let me answer.I feel the emptiness from the space he created between us.

Ace is the one person I don’t want to talk about, but if Jackson is going to be my friend with the possibility of becoming more, I should be honest with him.But how honest?I decide I don't need to go into detail, but I can give him the CliffNotes version.

“You’re right, we grew up together.He actually moved in next door when I was ten, and that's how we all met.I did everything with him, Morgan, and Cassie.I won’t lie to you and tell you I've never had feelings for him.There was a time when he was everything to me.”I let out a breath and continue.

"Ace and I had little moments in the last year or two that made me think he may have some more-than-friend feelings for me, too....but I was wrong."I'm starting to stumble over my words a bit."So to answer your question, no, there is nothing going on with me and Ace."

“Fuck, Ainsley.I don’t understand how he couldn't see what was right in front of him.You are gorgeous and smart.You carry yourself with such confidence, and it’s hot as fuck.”He’s moved in close to me again, placing a hand on my hip.

“Well, I wasn’t always like this.Spending the summer away for a writing program did me some good.My roommate-turned-best friend helped me get out of the depressive rut I was in.I used to dress like a tomboy, and lacked all confidence in myself.Jordan gave me a hard dose of reality, and I guess you could say she gave me a makeover.She's a badass, who snapped me out of feeling sorry for myself, and built me back up.”This mouthful of honesty is getting very deep, ripping me wide open.

I'm not sure why I’m being so forthcoming.Maybe it’s the way Jackson is looking at me with such sincerity, letting me know he is listening and here for me.He's not pitying me, he's being a friend.

“I don’t care if you wore a burlap sack.If I were him, I would have staked my claim a long time ago.Tomboy or not, you're gorgeous, and deserve for someone to tell you that.”

“Thanks for saying that.You and Jordan are the only ones who know I had feelings for him” My mouth pulls up into a sincere smile, and now both of his hands are on my hips.

So what if Ace says he's a womanizer?I won’t judge him for past indiscretions—I never judged Ace.Jackson is easy to talk to, and if something blossoms from there then I'll go with the flow.

He leans down close to my face.His lips hover over mine, and if I move just a little closer they’ll be touching.

“Is this okay?I mean, I know you kissed me last night, but I feel like that was a dig at Maddox for treating you like a child.”His hand moves up to cup my cheek.

I wanted him to be the one to kiss me, but while we are so close, I think he's waiting for me to make the choice.Getting out of my head, I quickly press my lips to his with a quick peck, then back away.

"I think we can do better than that."He pulls me back, pressing his lips to mine.Our mouths are closed, and I'm fine with that.I don't know how to make out.

This is only my second kiss, but he doesn't know that.This kiss is good—like, really good.He definitely knows what he's doing, so I follow his lead.He teases my bottom lip with his tongue as I inhale a gasp, surprised by the foreign touch.He uses that moment to gently push his tongue into my slightly parted lips.

Our tongues caress in a slow dance, playing with one another to find a rhythm.I'm not sure what comes over me when I reach my arms behind him, running my nails up and down his back.He groans in my mouth, so I must be doing something right.This may not feel like the earth-shattering moment with Ace, where I think I could have come on the spot with the slightest touch, but there is a small spark.

I break the kiss, and we are both panting, a little out of breath.I look around to make sure we're still alone.While our lips may have parted from each other, our bodies are still pressed together.He speaks softly onto my lips.

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