Page 84 of Shot For Mercy

“Em,” he whispers. “Em.”

“It’s okay, Cole,” I whisper, unclasping his hands from the chains, and he falls into me. I hold him up, barely. He’s dead weight. “You’re going to be okay.”

But I realize that may not be true. He’s bleeding profusely, bleeding all over me, and I yell for my brothers to get the car to us. Matteo and I carry Cole up the stairs and out of the house together, and once we’re in the car, I press my hand to his wound with a blanket. He’s freezing, his skin cold, and he’s also shivering.

“Fuck, don’t do this to me,” Matteo says from the front seat, but Cole’s in and out of consciousness, not aware of anything surrounding him. “Cole! Snap the fuck out of it!”

My nostrils flare as he talks to my man. My everything. But I don’t snap at him; instead, I press a kiss to Cole’s cheek. I turn his head slightly and lean in, whispering in his ear.

“You’re so strong, baby.” My throat tightens, and tears start welling in my eyes. I breathe through them. “You’re going to make it out of this. Don’t you dare fucking leave me. Ineedyou.”

My driver speeds up as I tell him we need to get to the nearest hospital right fucking now. Matteo already spoke to one of the surgeons and offered him an astronomical amount of money to operate on Cole. We’re paying for his discretion, and he agreed. The only thing Cole needs to do is hang on.

“Only a couple more miles, Cole,” I say soothingly, pressing my hand harder against his wound, and he groans, his eyes rolling to the back of his head. He’s still in and out, his face pale, sweat running down his temple. “Hang on for me.Please.”

We finally pull up to the hospital, and Matteo and I jump out of the car. Suddenly, we’re swarmed by nurses who put him on a stretcher quickly and lead him inside. We run after them, but we’re led into a waiting room. I don’t pay attention to anything except for one of the recliners, and I sit down with my face in my hands, letting myself finally break down.

He’s probably not going to make it out of this.

He was shot in the chest.

He could fucking die.

I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if he dies. It would be my fault. We were sloppy. We should’ve had a better plan. It’s at this moment that I wish I hadn’t killed Sokolov so quickly. I wish I could’ve made him suffer more than I did. The way he died was fucking merciful and painless. I fucking hate it. He deserved worse than that. Cole deserved more from me.

“You really do love him, don’t you?” Matteo asks softly from his chair across the room.

I look up at him, making eye contact. “Yes.”

He nods. “I can tell.”

I take a deep breath and try to calm myself down, to no avail. What I’m about to say goes against everything I feel, but I can’t be selfish right now. If Cole survives this, he’d be getting a second chance at life.

“What you said to me about him loving you…” I shake my head, trying to snap out of it. “If he wants to be with you after this, I won’t stand in the way. I’ll let you have him.”

Matteo shakes his head. “He didn’t even notice me standing beside you, Dad,” he says sadly. “He called for you. You’re the one he wants.”

My heart flutters in my chest, because yes, he did. In his weakest moment, he called for me. “I’m just letting you know, still.”

“I appreciate that,” he replies, “but he already chose you.”

“I don’t know, son.” I shake my head. “Death can really put things into perspective. Maybe he changed his mind.”

“I doubt it.” He sighs, running a hand down his face. “He’s yours, Dad.”

“Will you come around, Matteo?” I ask, a lump forming in my throat. “Will you go to therapy with me?”

“Yes, I’ll go to therapy with you.”

I deflate, relief filling me to bursting. “Thank you. I won’t let you down again.”

“You can’t ask for the world, though.” And I know I can’t. I really hurt him. “I don’t think I can go to your wedding.”

“I understand.”

“Cole won’t.” He chuckles. “He’s fucking stubborn. He’ll want me there.”

“I’ll talk to him.” I sigh. “If he even makes it out of this.”

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