Page 1 of A Fierce Princess

Prologue

“Though she be but little, she is fierce.” ~William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night’s Dream

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Chris’s hand is sweaty.I try to pull my hand away from his, but his grip tightens. I look up to tell him to let me go. His glare down at me shuts me up before I even open my mouth. I look back down at the pavement. I feel as though we’ve been walking forever. Auggie and Daddy are to my right. My feet hurt because my shoes are too small. Auntie Lara said I had to wear them because they were Mommy’s favorite.

I look up at the box carrying Mommy. I know she’s inside because the lid was open before we left the palace. Daddy had asked us if we wanted to see her. I had wanted to see her. She looked asleep. Daddy reminded me she was not asleep. She was dead. Dead like my bunny, Chomper. Dead like my fish, Newton. Dead like the flowers on Mommy’s desk. While my daddy spoke to Chris and Auggie, I walked up to the box. I poked Mommy and told her to wake up, but she didn’t move. I stuck a picture I had drawn into the side of the box. I don’t want Mommy to miss me.

My lower lip trembles at the thought of Mommy alone in that box. She didn’t have her crown. Her favorite crown that she always wears. Daddy says it’s missing. Mommy will be so sad without it, without me.

Chris squeezes my hand, and I look up at him. He doesn’t smile but he winks at me. It’s our special wink. It means everything will be alright. Only, Mommy is dead, so everything is not alright.

I want to whine about my shoes. I want to cry about Mommy. But mostly, I just want to go back to my room, away from all the people. Daddy said we had to let the public pay their respects. We had to go to the church with Mommy in her box, and now we have to walk back to our garden with her. There are so many people on the streets. I don’t like it. I don’t understand why people keep saying that they are sorry. It’s like they did something wrong, only I don’t think that they did.

Chris pulls my hand, and I realize we have stopped. We are in front of the gates of the palace. A priest starts talking, and we stand there for a very long time. I tap Chris’s shoe with my own. He taps back. Then Daddy takes my hand and leads me up to Mommy’s box.

Chris and Auggie are next to us. Daddy picks me up because I’m so short I can’t see the top of the box.

“It’s time to say goodbye to Mommy,” he says. I see a single tear roll down his cheek. His hand comes to rest on top of the box. I place mine next to it.

“Daddy?” I ask.

He turns to me. He’s crying, and Daddy never cries. I’m now afraid to say anything out loud for fear I will say the wrong thing. I cup my hands around my mouth and whisper in his ear, “Can I kiss Mommy goodbye?”

His lip trembles and he closes his eyes for a long moment. “You may kiss her box,” he whispers back to me. I nod, and he leans me down. I place both hands on the box and press a kiss to it. I hear cameras and see lots of flashes. I close my eyes, blocking all the noise and people from my vision.

“I love you, Mommy. Goodbye,” I whisper. I’m about to raise my head when I look down and see not just Daddy’s hand but also Chris’s and Auggie’s hands too. I leave my hand there, and we all stand huddled around Mommy.

After a minute, Daddy steps back along with my brothers. He keeps me in his arms, his nose pressed against my hair. He holds me so tight that it almost hurts. I want to tell him so. It’s the feel of another tear against my cheek that keeps me from saying anything because I don’t want Daddy to cry anymore.

As the priest finishes talking, I feel my brothers on either side of Daddy and me. I look one last time at Mommy’s box before I turn away and wrap my arms tightly around Daddy’s neck, burying my face into him and closing my eyes.

I’m afraid to open them…afraid to acknowledge what I know in my heart…afraid of what happens now.

Chapter 1

Fourteen years later…

“Are you in?” Sonya asks.

“Just a minute…” I trail off as I focus on decoding encryption. It’s what I live for…the one thing that is mine and truly me.

“One second…” I add as I keep typing. Sonya is silent on the other line. It’s not actually that hard. I’m half-focused on the task at hand, while I continue to monitor another project on my other computer, the one no one knows about.

“And…done,” I finally say.

“Yes! I knew you could do it,” she says, and I hear her clap.

I weave my way through the code until I find what I’m looking for and I make a few minor tweaks before I back out without leaving a trace.

“OK, all done. You owe me one,” I say to my best friend.

I look down at the video chat in time to see her rolling her eyes. “What can you possibly want? You’re a fucking princess for god’s sake!” she says.

I smirk.

“Oh, no,” she says.

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