Page 26 of A Fierce Princess

“Do you have a boyfriend back home?” he asks. I look up at him in shock. “I’m sorry, that was inappropriate of me to ask,” he adds quickly.

I laugh. “No, it wasn’t, and no, I don’t,” I say to him.

“Really? Why not?” he asks. “Oh wait, do you have an arranged marriage?”

I burst out in giggles. “An arranged marriage?” I spurt out. “Uh, nope.”

“Sorry, I just didn’t know, I mean…” He trails off and blushes.

I touch his arm. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to be mean about that. It was just funny. There are so many misperceived things about royals,” I say.

“Like what else?” he asks.

“That we are all stuck-up. That we can get whatever we want, whenever we want it,” I say.

“What can’t you get?” he asks. I want to say “you,” but instead I shrug.

“Just because I want a vacation, for instance, doesn’t always mean I get one,” I say.

“You got this one,” he points out.

“I did,” I say slowly. “But this is unusual,” I add.

“It must be tough to be famous,” he muses.

I shrug again. “I suppose. For me…well, I don’t know anything else,” I say. “There have been a few times when I went somewhere, and no one knew who I was. It was nice, just being me and living my life.”

“I’m glad you came on this trip,” Logan says.

I look up at him, and he smiles at me. “I’m glad I came too,” I say.

We chat about different parts of the week, and eventually, everyone heads back to the boat. Vicky makes us a feast of seafood. There’s sautéed fish, lobster, and clam chowder. It’s delicious and everyone eats entirely too much. That’s quickly followed by everyone drinking entirely too much.

We play two rounds of cards, pairing up into teams. Thomas goes up to steer the boat, so Vicky and Auggie play together, and Chris and Mia team up, leaving Logan and me to play together. He squeezes against me in the booth to make room for Vicky and Auggie. His leg is warm against mine, but I don’t want him to move it.

We win both rounds and my brothers scoff, saying I hustled them. Logan laughs and says I led the team because cards are not his forte.

The night gets later, and I itch to go up and sit on my cushion again. I just want to feel the serenity of the night at sea one last time. I excuse myself, and I head up to my perch, but first I go and say hi to Thomas.

We chat briefly about the trip, and I thank him for his assistance. Turns out he and Vicky are a thing. I only get that much after a whole lot of prying. I half contemplate whether Logan knows this, but then I think it’d be silly if he didn’t since they all live in close quarters together.

I walk up to the front of the boat and breathe in the salty air. I see a dolphin jump alongside the boat, and I smile. Part of me wishes I could be that dolphin, free to go where I want. Free to live my life how I want.

I once read something that said being royal was like living in a gilded cage, and I think that person had it right. Everything looks beautiful, but you can’t leave it. I stand a moment longer, enjoying the view and looking up at the night sky. The moon isn’t as full, and there are so many stars in the darkness. It makes me feel small and insignificant, it also makes me feel powerful. I let my mind wander as I contemplate the universe and my purpose in it. I haven’t had such lofty thoughts in years. I almost never let my mind wander anymore, but I allow myself these few minutes to relax before I have to go deal with the inevitable task ahead of me.

I walk over to my cushion and lie back on it. I think about all the wonderful things that I’ve seen this week, giving in to my need to procrastinate from reality for a few more minutes. Then as though my mind is reminding me, I think about Logan. Logan. I groan. I have no idea what to do. He has to know. I need to garner all my bravery and tell him.

Chapter 14

“Iwish I could just tell him,” I whisper to myself as I stare out at the night sky.

“Tell who what?” Logan’s voice comes from behind me, and I jump.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you,” he says, walking up to the cushion and taking a seat next to me. He lies back, and I continue looking up at the night sky. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it?”

“Yes,” I whisper.

“You alright, Susanna?” he says, looking over at me. I turn my head to face him. We’re so close. I see the moonlight reflected in his eyes. They look like endless pools of gray in the darkness of the night.