Page 1 of Pack Giroux

Chapter One

In the past couple months, I've learned new things that I love about myself. Like the fact that I'm really good at volleyball. And that I'm pretty great at pretending...that I'm happy...that our lifestyle doesn't disgust me...that I'm not planning on leaving the second I get a chance.

I've also come to discover andlovethat when I make a decision, I don't back down from it.

That's how I find myself sneaking out of my pack house window at two o'clock in the morning. Four years of playing volleyball at the school on our compound landed me a scholarship at North Five University. With the help of my coach, of course. A small fact that had to be kept as much of a secret as the rest of it. If anyone ever found out that she helped me, she'd be in as much trouble as I am for leaving.

"Here's your bus ticket and some cash I had saved up," she whispers to me as I make it to the fence, handing me a thick envelope. "I'm sorry I can't drive you, but the bus station is only two miles outside of the compound. Remember where?"

I nod with tears in my eyes. "Thank you for helping me."

She swallows hard and with tears in her eyes replies, "You're welcome. I'm just sorry I can't go with you or be of more help."

"I'm sorry you can't go, too" I tell her, tearing up myself. "I'll return the favor if you ever want to leave."

Pulling me into a tight hug, she gets choked up on her words and can’t seem to utter another. Even as she backs away and ushers me over the fence.

The trek through the woods is dark. Even following the trail that's been marked and worn down from use. Leaves crunch under my feet as I kick myself into a light jog. More than anything, I want to run as hard and as fast as I can, but I've gotmiles to go. I know from practice that I've got to pace myself. My bag can't weigh more than twenty pounds, but with every step it seems to get heavier and heavier, until it feels like I'm carrying two-hundred.

It's quiet in the woods. Early fallen leaves crunch under my feet. Wind blows through the ones still in the trees, making the boughs creak in the otherwise silence. Controlling my breathing like I've learned to do during practice and workouts, I'm able to pick up my pace a bit.

Before I know it, I hit the edge of the woods and run through a small ditch and up onto the road. I stop long enough to look both ways to make sure I'm not being hunted yet. Turning toward town, I take off again. Being out in the open like this is making my stomach churn. I would slip back into the woods, but it'll take twice as long. Hopefully, I'll be able to see headlights coming and will be able to hide before they see me, if it comes to that.

When the lights of the bus station finally come into view, I could cry in relief. I can't yet, though. I'm not in the clear. I slow to a brisk walk, wiping the sweat off my face so that I don't appear suspicious.

Slipping onto the bus isn’t hard in the middle of the night. The only drawback is that there aren’t enough riders to hide. If anyone ever comes asking, it wouldn’t be hard to remember a young girl like myself getting on alone at this hour. Especially, a red-haired nerdy girl who can barely pass for eighteen even though I’m about to be a year older than that. These thoughts race through my mind, making me pull the hat of my hoodie over my head to hide as much as possible.

The driver steps off the bus and offers to take my single bag but I hug it to my chest, holding out my ticket for him to take instead. Looking bored and unbothered, he takes it from me and marches back up the steps. I have a feeling it’s intentionalthat he didn’t usher me forward to go first. Almost like he’s used to picking up strays and runaways and is giving me the chance to change my mind. If he only knew the truth of what I'm running from, he would probably offer to send me further. Or, he might take me back. If there's one thing I've had to learn the hard way, it's that adults can't be trusted. None of them. I'd even been worried that this whole situation with Coach was a setup and that I'd be caught and punished. The only thing worse than having to go back and endure our lifestyle, would be the punishment. It gets doled out in the early biblical sense.

I don't waste any time hanging around outside the bus, following the driver up almost immediately. Not wanting to be obvious, I claim a seat midway instead of the back. It's another ten or fifteen anxious minutes before the driver finally shuts the doors and pulls away from the depot. I have to wipe another round of sweat off my forehead, rubbing my hands down my face as I do. Tears burn down the back of my eyes, but I don't let them spill over. It's bad enough that I look like the runaway that I am. The last thing I need is some concerned citizen trying to help. I'm only one of several riders tonight, but it's still not worth the risk.

We're heading down the road in the direction of the compound. The only giveaway that it's even out there is a small dirt road that looks like it leads directly into the woods. Only once we pass it am I able to sink down into my seat and relax. I'm not in the clear and may never completely be, but I'm safe for now at least.

I stay awake for hours watching out the window as we pass trees and open fields in the rural areas before coming into a few towns. We make several stops, picking up a couple people and letting one off. I keep a close eye on everyone, especially outside the stations. No one looks suspicious or wandering around with my photo in their hand asking anyone questions.

I'm still awake as night turns to day, and I get to enjoy my first sunrise of freedom where I'm not required to be at worship. The thought sends a spike of fear through my chest. They'll realize now, if they haven't already, that I'm gone. I wonder how long it'll take them to learn that I'm not even on the compound property any longer. In my almost nineteen years, I've never heard of anyone running away. Then again, wehavebeen told that someone died for no reason and that someone got lost in the woods to never come home. It makes me slightly curious if it was all lies. The rest of it sure was.

It takes three whole days to get from the compound to the city that I'm being dropped off in. Three days of riding on different buses. Three days of using terminal restrooms. Three days of no showers. Three days of eating vending machine snack food when I get hungry. As inconvenient and uncomfortable as it is, I wish it took longer. Across the ocean wouldn't be far enough away from them.

It's the afternoon when my bus reaches its final stop in the middle of a big city. I step out into the bright sunlight and have to get my bearings for a moment. The noise and hustle and bustle of so many people is so unlike anything I've ever heard. It's overwhelming. Controlling my breathing like I do when I'm running, I put one step in front of the other and figure out my next move.

Planning this out had taken a really long time. I'd made sure to get off here in a big city hours away from my real destination, just in case anyone goes back to try to find me through my bus travels. So, my next difficulty will be finding a taxi willing to drive hours away. Coach had said there would be taxis here that sit and wait on people that need them, and she was right.

Of course, the first two I ask laugh outright in my face. The one who finally agrees, says it's going to cost me. SomethingI readily agree to. We drive a few hours to another city before I pay him and repeat the process. Once I finally make it to the small town that houses my new college, I'm exhausted and ready for food, sleep, and a shower. Not necessarily in that order.

The last taxi drops me right in the middle of town among cute, little stores and within walking distance of the campus. I'd done the virtual tour as many times as I dared without getting caught, so I know exactly where I'm going. The residence hall is one of the very first buildings and looms in front of me. I wish that I could've gotten a shower before being presented to anyone, but I can't get that without being able to get into my building.

Pulling my hair down, I run my fingers through it and do my best to make it as flat as possible before putting it back up on top of my head. I one finger push my glasses up the bridge of my nose before walking inside. With a building this size, I'd thought it might take forever to find the right place, but it's easily mapped out with arrows pointing in every direction.

It only takes a few minutes before I'm standing in front of a giant built-in desk and ringing the little, silver bell.

A middle-aged woman with a sweet face comes around the corner at the sound. "Well, hello there, dear. How may I help you?"

"I need to pick up my housing information and keys," I tell her. "Marnie Ellis."

She strolls over to the little cubby holes in the wall and runs a finger in the air across them until she finally goes, "Ah hah." Pulling a stack out of one of the larger spots, she walks back and hands it across the desk to me. "All of your residency information is right here, including your key to get into your room. You also had some mail that has already been delivered. If we don't have you registered as being on campus yet, we always hold it for you here. Do you have any questions for me or needdirections to your dorm?"

I shake my head. "I know where to go. Thank you."

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