Page 32 of Trusting the Fall

She drops her eyes to her glass, and concern tickles the back of my brain as I note the dejected way her shoulders drop.

“I haven’t been sleeping well,” she says.

I haven’t seen her as much lately with the change in her work hours, but the peace that usually follows her has been noticeably absent of late.

“Thanks for setting up the coffee machine last night, by the way,” she says.

I tilt my head, wondering what the hell she’s talking about with the coffee machine, but instead focus on the first thing she said. “Everything going okay with work?”

She takes a sip of her drink, nodding. “Yeah, it’s good.”

“Dylan? How’s he doing with Jed’s?”

“He had a meeting with an investor last week, actually. He’s not telling me too many details about them, he wants to wait untilit’s more of a sure thing, but apparently I should prepare to be wowed.”

“Then what’s up, girlfriend?” I hoist myself onto the kitchen bench where she stands, still staring down into her coffee.

She blows out a breath before pinning her grey eyes on me. “It’s Caleb.”

My brows furrow as I rack my brain for the name. Am I a shit friend for not knowing who she’s talking about? “Who’s Caleb?”

“That guy I was with last month.”

“The suit you met at The Wayside?” The look she gives me is like a wounded puppy.

I instantly want to do whatever I can to fix it.

“Honey,” I sing and pull on her hand, bringing her to stand in front of me, and I wrap my bestie in a bear hug. “Talk to me. What are you overthinking in this big, beautiful brain of yours?”

She groans into my shoulder, where I’m partly suffocating her with my gentle love.

“He made me feel things,” she says, causing my brows to dip.

It was only one night. He didn’t even stay until morning. Could she really be this affected?

I have to remind myself that Lex feels deeply. It’s the reason she’s so hesitant to jump right into things. The past has not left her optimistic that things last forever, but she’s a forever kind of girl.

Not like me.

I’ll take my orgasms with a smile on my face and a slap on their arse for a job well done before sending them on their way.

Except for Leif.

But I don’t harbour any expectations that this is something more than an extended situationship, much like the ones I’ve explored previously. Although I was much more aware when I was entering one in the past. What I have with Leif feels unexpected, in every sense of the word.

“How? What things?”

Lex taps out on my arm, and I grant her air.

She takes a deep breath before meeting my eyes and shrugs. “I don’t know. It’s just never been like that with anyone else. He was so,” she furrows her brow in thought, “present. Commanding.”

“Is it possible he was just really good at sex compared to anyone else you’ve been with?”

She laughs, and I feel my heart warm knowing I can make her smile. Lex has always been a reliable source of strength for me. It feels nice knowing I can return the favour.

“He was definitely the best I’ve ever been with.” She reaches over for her coffee and takes a healthy gulp. “But it was more than that. It was like we both knew we were feeling something different. Special. It was chasing a high you didn’t know was possible.”

Goosebumps erupt on my skin at the way she describes their connection. I can’t help but compare it to the way Leif makes me feel. When we’re together, he looks so deep into my eyes, it’s like he’s seeing my soul, recognising it as the one that matches his. When we come together, our bodies move in perfect harmony, fulfilling each other’s desires with ease. It’s completely terrifying. I can feel my heart trying to escape up my throat to reject the feeling.

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