Page 98 of Try Me

Fulfilling Your Destiny

Pearl

In the lobbyof the Royal Hawaiian, Pearl asked for a car to pick her up. She didn’t know where she wanted to go, but she knew she couldn’t sit in her hotel room, staring at the same four walls.

“Which way, miss?” the driver asked when she got in the back seat.

Pearl sighed and looked around, unsure of where to go. “I don’t care,” she said. “Just drive.”

The driver studied her for a minute. “How about Diamond Head?” he asked. “Everyone always wants to see Diamond Head.”

“Fine,” Pearl agreed.

She lowered the window and kicked off her shoes. This had officially been the longest, most emotional day of her life. She’d always thought she had a rather clinical mind. Pearl prided herself on her control over her emotions. Declan was right, she would have made a magnificent doctor. She was cool and calm and always collected.

But right now, she was the exact opposite. Outside and inside, she was a disaster. Her makeup was smeared, her dress was wrinkled, and her mind was a swampland of doubt. Tomorrow was the most important day of her life, and she couldn’t even think straight.

As they drove past the park, Pearl looked out the window at the huge banyan tree where she’d first met Linda. Her heart seized when she remembered passing Linda in the hall outside Declan’s room. The woman hadn’t even recognized Pearl.

Her fists balled, and she wished she had another bag of peas to punch. She didn’t know which stung more, seeing Linda come out of Declan’s room, or seeing him kiss Claudia? Or maybe the sharpest dagger had been the way Declan had lied to her about not knowing Claudia was in the plan.

Suddenly Pearl couldn’t breathe. Her heart lodged in her throat, and she couldn’t suck in air. She choked on a sob.

“Everything okay, miss?” the driver asked, looking at her in the rearview mirror.

Pearl couldn’t answer. She was crying too hard.

The driver pulled over to the side of the road at the base of Diamond Head. He hopped out and ran around the back of the car. Yanking open the back door, he knelt and helped Pearl out of the car.

“Please, don’t throw up in the Rolls Royce, miss,” he said. “My boss will kill me.”

Pearl attempted to pull herself together. She straightened her spine and wiped her eyes. “I’m not going to throw up,” she said, hoping her heaving stomach was listening. “Leave me alone.”

The driver looked taken aback. “I’ll go wait in the car,” he said, scurrying away.

Pearl stumbled barefoot down the slope of Diamond Head Crater that gradually disappeared into the sea. Picking her way through the low shrubs, Pearl walked to a small stretch of sand that sparkled under the stars.

She sat down on the beach and huddled inside Declan’s jacket. Enveloped by his scent, Pearl let the tears fall. She’d vowed her whole life to be strong and resist the temptations that would eventually destroy her. But love was a tricky disease. It ate you up and filled you at the same time. A power struggle of push and pull, love was never steady or predictable.

Pearl realized that love was like the ocean. You never knew what you would get on the waves. The ocean had robbed her of her mother, but it had also given Pearl some of the best moments of her life.

The unforgiving ocean didn’t care if you were male or female, yellow, brown, or white. The waves were the ultimate leveling field. Either you could surf or you couldn’t. And Pearl could. She’d learned to let go enough and feel the ocean, so that the balance was equal. Could she do the same with love?

Pearl had spent her whole adult life terrified that she would end up like her mother — blinded by love. She’d had a glimpse of what love could be, and everything was different. Now, her biggest fear was not being like her mother. What if Pearl never knew love?

Pearl hung her head in her hands, too exhausted to make sense of her thoughts. The day had been too long, and tomorrow loomed over her like a set of breaking waves. She needed solace, and for that she sought the ocean.

Pearl shed Declan’s jacket, then took off her dress. Leaving her clothes in a pile on the sand, she stepped into the water. As always, the warm Pacific welcomed her; it made her whole.

Hearing the melodic call of her mother’s voice, she slipped under the waves.

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