Page 85 of XOXO, Valentina

“Is she your girlfriend?”

“No. She was never into me. She likes Jaden. I guess I’m not her type.”

I studied my son. “Smart, handsome, and athletic isn’t her type?”

He rolled his eyes. “You’re my mom. Of course you have to say that stuff.”

I patted his hair, which was in desperate need of a cut. The springy curls had enough weight to hang over his forehead into his eyes. “Your dad would be…” I stopped, too choked up to finish.

“Really proud of me,” he said for me. “I know.” He ducked away from my hand before I had a chance to smooth his hair. “He would be proud of you, too. And he would want you to be happy. He wouldn’t want you to be alone.”

Emotion clogged my throat. “I’m not alone.” I swallowed thickly. “I have you.”

“I meant a boyfriend or husband or something.”

My stomach tightened. “I’m not ever going to have another husband. Your father was the only man who will ever have that title.”

“Mom?” Shane asked, leaning closer to me across the console.

I looked into his big brown eyes. Shane was almost all his dad, except his eyes were all me. “Yeah?”

His eyes were wide with concern. Little flecks of gold and amber burst out from his irises. “Can I get real with you for a minute?”

“Of course.”

“Forget about what Dad would want. What do you thinkIwant for you?”

I’d never given it consideration. Our relationship went the other way around. I took care of Shane. I wanted things for him. I never expected he might want things for me, too. I blinked rapidly as tears threatened. “I don’t know.”

“I want to know someone is there for you when I’m not around anymore.”

I gulped. I didn’t like to think too hard about the inevitable day Shane would leave.

“I worry about you,” he said. “It would be nice to know you had someone like Coach Joey to take care of you when I’m gone.”

I’d never wanted to cry more than I did right then, but I held myself together. We were getting ready to have supper with my family, and I didn’t want to break down right before we walked in. One of my mother’s talents was sensing tears and drama a mile away.

I cleared my throat and pulled Shane into a hug. His soft curls tickled my cheek. He no longer had that little boy smell of feet and maple syrup, but he was still my baby—except he was wiser than me. A whole lot.

When we got home, Shane went straight to his room to connect with his buddies on his online game. I could hear him yelling and laughing, and the sound pricked my heart.

I missed Joey’s laugh.

He would tease me, saying I missed more than that, but it was true. I missed his laugh the most. His laugh filled me up inside, as if I’d just eaten Thanksgiving dinner.

I puttered around in the kitchen, made lists of everything I needed to accomplish in the upcoming week, and finished all Shane’s laundry he’d brought back from a week at camp, but still I hadn’t heard from Joey.

My phone buzzed, and I lunged so fast I almost pulled a hamstring. I’d hoped it was Joey, but it was Kennedy, on the book club text thread.

Kennedy [5:58 p.m.] : I’m so pissed I could scream.

It was so out of character for Kennedy to be mad, I had to double check the sender.

Sloane [5:59 p.m.] : omg what happened?

Mia [5:59 p.m.] : Do I need to have someone arrested?

Kennedy [5:59 p.m.] : Can you meet at Hawthorne’s?

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