Page 21 of Sweet Torture

She gave our son my name. Almost. Jacob’s last name will be changed to Bliss as soon as possible.

“That’s right,” Ashlyn says. “Your middle name is Owen because I named you after him. He’s your daddy.”

Jacob’s head tilts to the side as he studies me for a moment. I’m certain he’s trying to work out in his young mind what that means.

He turns and looks at Ashlyn, appearing confused. “You said I didn’t have a daddy.”

“I was wrong, baby. Very, very wrong. You have a father and he loves you a whole bunch. He wants to be in your life.”

Jacob turns to look at me again but says nothing.

“How do you feel about that?” I ask, bracing myself for what might come out of this child’s mouth. It could be anything but I’m hopeful he’ll be open to a relationship with me.

“I’ve always wanted a daddy.”

I get up and go to the sofa so I can sit beside him and Ashlyn. “You know what, Jacob? I’ve always wanted a son. And I’m so happy that I now have one. You.” This boy and his mother mean the world to me. “Would it be OK if I gave you a hug?”

He looks at Ashlyn for approval and it’s a reminder that I’m nothing more than a stranger to him. “He’s your daddy, Jacob. You can hug him.”

I expect him to lean in for a brief embrace but he gets up and comes over to sit in my lap. I put my arm around him and hold him closely. Smells like a sweaty little boy who just played baseball. “You don’t know it yet but you’re gonna be my little buddy.”

“I’ll see you again?”

“That’s right. You’re going to see me all the time. Every day.” No point in waiting to tell him our plans.

“Jacob, your father and I love each other very much. He has asked me to marry him and I’ve said yes. Do you understand what that means?”

He shrugs. “You’ll kiss and hold hands?”

Ashlyn smiles. “Yes, we’ll kiss and hold hands but it’s a lot more than that. We’re all going to live in the same house, and he and I will sleep in the same bed every night. You’ll sleep in your big-boy bed in your room.”

“Can I still come to your bed if I have bad dreams?”

“You sure can, baby.”

“OK.”

OK? Just like that?

“Do you have any questions you want to ask? Anything you need us to explain? Anything you want to tell us?” I love Ashlyn’s motherly tone.

Jacob inspects my sling. “What happened to your arm?”

I think this is a sign we can stop worrying about him being completely traumatized by my sudden appearance in his life.

“I hurt my shoulder when I was throwing a fast ball.”

His eyes widen. “You can throw a fast ball?”

“I sure can.” At least, I hope I still can after this injury heals. “I know everything there is to know about baseball because I’m a coach. And my father, who is your other grandfather, was a baseball coach too. He taught me and now both of us will teach you.”

I can’t wait for my family to meet Jacob. With my nephew on the way, my parents will be getting two grandsons in the same month.

“Will you play with me?” Jacob looks so excited.

“Honey, Daddy’s arm is hurt. He just had surgery so he can’t right now.”

I probably shouldn’t but I want to play ball with my son. I can’t disappoint him by saying no the first time he asks so I lift my right arm. “I can use this one.” He’s four. He won’t know if it’s a good pitch or not.

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