Page 112 of His Surrogate Omega

“I wish to call on you. As a suitor.” Tensen smiled slightly, his face darkening a little. “If you’ll have me.”

Gray froze, shocked.

“I know you already told me I wasn’t for you… and I know there are things I cannot do for you as an alpha could… but I find myself unable to stop thinking about you. You are an incredible man, Gray.”

An alpha would offer him freedom. Children. A future. What could he possibly have with a beta?

Love?

His heart clenched as he realized he’d already fallen in love with someone else.

He closed his eyes, knowing it was never to be. Even if they lost Jamie, he wasn’t sure either he or Rohan could love again. Tensen was kind. He was considerate. And he’d likely treat Gray with respect.

I want more. I want love.

“I don’t know,” Gray murmured. “My life is in such a state of chaos right now, it’s hard to make any kind of decisions now.”

Tensen smiled wanly. “It’s not a no. Perhaps we can discuss it again—after you’ve had the baby and some time to readjust to your life.”

“Perhaps,” Gray said.

Tensen took a sip from his glass. “How are Jamie and Rohan, by the way? I’ve reached out to Jamie a few times in the last couple of weeks, but we keep playing phone tag, it seems.”

“He’s doing as good as can be expected, all things considered,” Gray said. “The new round of chemo hasn’t been easy on him.”

From the look on Tensen’s face, Gray realized he might’ve said too much.

“His cancer is back?”

“Ah, yes. I assumed you knew. But then… if you haven’t been in contact in a few weeks, maybe not. I’m sorry, that was their news to share.”

“It was news theyshould’veshared with me.” Tensen rose quickly. “I’m afraid I have to cut our visit short. I’ll try to stop in again and see you very soon.”

Gray rose unsteadily and followed the beta to the door. Before he left, Tensen leaned in and placed a chaste kiss to Gray’s cheek.

“Just don’t forget about me,” Tensen murmured before he left.

Gray shut the door and lifted a hand to the place where the man had kissed him. And then he remembered the almost kiss he’d gotten from Rohan. He’d felt more thrill… more delight from a near miss than he did one to his cheek.

But could beggars really be so choosy?

A kind, attentive companion had to be better than nothing.

Gray wandered into the kitchen and saw the flowers in a too small vase. After pulling more appropriately sized one from the pantry, he readjusted them, adding his own flair to the arrangement. Once he was done there, he waddled his way out to his studio—which he hadn’t used in weeks.

Months, really.

Since the onset of Jamie’s illness, he just hadn’t had the time. Nor the desire. It also didn’t help that he hadn’t been sleeping well. His girth made it hard to remain comfortable—and lifting Jamie so often was killing his back even more.

Gray sat in front of a page of blank newsprint with a charcoal in hand, searching his mind for some inspiration. Nothing came.

He dropped the charcoal onto the table beside his easel and inhaled slowly.

Gray felt lost.

He wasn’t the same person anymore… and it impacted everything in his life. His body was so swollen and changed, that he simply didn’t feel like him anymore. Gray spread a hand over his growing stomach and rose, his back aching from sitting on the stool.

By the time the car came to pick him up for his monthly exam by his obstetrician, Dr. Forsythe, he had tried reading, a crossword puzzle, and yoga to keep his body and mind focused—all ending in massive frustration. He slid into the backseat and saw Jamie and Jefre were already there.

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