Page 111 of Deadly Sweet

Sometimes it's funny, sometimes it just makes me feel stupid.

My memory loss isn’t normal. Some things stick in the back of my mind, like I just know what to do, what things are, how to act, or how to function.

Other times, I take things literally. I don't always understand sarcasm.

I’m learning, though. And sometimes I get the sarcasm thing right. Duchess says too good at times.

Something I love about my pack is when I realize I’ve messed up, I don’t read the room right, or say something stupid they never point it out. They smile sweetly and appease me to save my feelings.

I’m aware yet, unaware of the world around me.

Because it’s not just memory loss, I know I have something else wrong with my head. I’m not all there, I’m nowhere near normal. I’m just as crazy as people think I am.

Fact is, I am who I am. I’m not sure that's ever going to change.

The doctor said that with the amount of trauma I’ve endured, I might never be the same.

While I’d like to remember my past, I don’t care if I do. I love my life, my friends, my pack, and Thor. I love the life I’ve built and what I’m continuing to add to it.

To say it in simple terms: if you don’t like me, then fuck off.

“I believe it.” Lucy smiles. “The way that man looks at you, talks about you. You're his whole world. Have been for years.”

I bite my lip, smiling as the warm and fuzzies fill me. I’m excited to get this alone time with Jake. I want to know more about our past together. How we met, how we became friends.

I could have asked him about it, but I felt like it would be better to bring something like that up during some us time.

“It’s my first date, and I want it to go perfectly,” I tell them as I get up off the bed and go to the mirror to fix my dress.

“It’s going to be amazing. Just be yourself and have fun,” Lucy encourages, coming to stand next to me.

“And no stabbing people!” Duchess reminds me.

“That’s no fun.” I pout. “What if they’re mean to me?”

She narrows her eyes. “Unless they put their hands on you or threaten harm, you can’t hurt them.”

“How about, as long as no one sees me do it?” I grin.

Duchess groans, throwing herself backwards onto the bed. “You're going to get yourself arrested one day.”

“No, I’m not,” I scoff. “I was trained by the best. Plus, my Alpha is a cop,” I point out.

She moves up onto her elbow. “Behave, Savvy,” she warns me.

“Okay.” I turn around to face her, putting my hands on my hips. “I could lie and tell you I will. But I don’t like lying. So, how about this? I’ll keep my hands to myself, and my blade tucked into my thigh strap as long as no one starts shit with me or my Alpha.”

“Fine,” she sighs heavily. “It’s the best I can ask for.”

A knock at the door gets all of our attention. Cobra stands in the doorway, looking all broody and shit, like normal. “There’s someone here to see Savannah," he grunts. “Says his name is Jake.”

A wave of nervousness hits me. “I’m not ready!” I spin around to face them with wide eyes.

“Yes, you are.” Lucy laughs. “You look stunning. Go, have fun, let Jake spoil you. I know he’s looking forward to this just as much as you are.”

“Okay,” I breathe out. “I can do this.”

“Yeah, you can,” Duchess agrees. ”You're a bad ass bitch.”

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