Page 44 of Butterfly

Jarvis was completely unfazed by the admission. Months ago, Captain had terrified Jarvis so much during a session that Jarvis had refused to see him again. Ollie had no idea what he’d said to get a reaction from him, but the horror coming from his mouth wasn’t getting one.

He wanted a reaction. He wanted Jarvis to recoil and order him back to the wing and say there was something wrong with him.

“He hadn’t hurt me that day. In fact, he’d been sober for five days. He’d been smiling for five days. He’d been making us promises for five days, and I still stabbed him to death.”

Nothing, not even a flicker on Jarvis’s face.

“I almost severed his head. I don’t think I would’ve stopped if Leo hadn’t been there. I’d been thinking about it for years, daydreaming about killing him.”

“Why was there a knife under your pillow?”

Ollie frowned. “What?”

“Did you put it there to kill your father with?”

“No.”

“Then why was it there?”

“In case.”

Jarvis gestured for him to continue.

“In case he ever came into our bedroom in the night.”

“Our?”

“Mine and Leo’s.”

“Ah.” Jarvis nodded. “I see.”

“What do you see?”

“That knife was for self-defence.” He frowned. “At least it was at first.”

“Maybe at first…”

“Can I ask you questions about what you’ve just told me?”

Ollie rubbed his brow. “I thought that was what you were supposed to do.”

“Sometimes people like to unload onto me, get something off their chests. It doesn’t need to be more than that unless you want it to be?”

“You can ask questions,” Ollie whispered.

“What was the trigger?”

“Trigger?”

“You had that knife for months, maybe longer, and you’d been thinking about killing your father for years, but you hadn’t. What changed?”

“I…I found out he hurt Leo.”

“And you killed him in revenge for hurting your brother, or did you kill him to make sure he couldn’t hurt him again?”

Ollie bit his lip. “The latter.”

Jarvis nodded.

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