Page 14 of Just A Little Love

Out of nowhere, I had the unstoppable urge to kiss him. I'm not sure who was more surprised when I ghosted my lips across his own. Gabriel's tongue darted out as if he wanted to see if my taste was still on his lips. With a small smile, I stepped back so we could go inside.

Gabriel turned to open the door when I stopped him with a hand on his coat sleeve. “Gabriel, may I call you Daddy while we shop? I think it might help me find the right frame of mind?” I do not know where those words came from, but I wasn’t taking them back. His answering smile was brilliant, and I felt the familiar warmth in the pit of my stomach again.

“Yeah, Bunny, you can.”

My sex store experiences fell into two categories: cheesy ones for straight couples who wanted to spice up their sex life, or slightlyseedier ones on the edge of town with more options for LGBTQ people. This place was overwhelming in the best kind of way. The shop mimicked a classic French boutique with simple lines and a minimalist design. Instead of items hung up via hooks on pegboards, they’d been grouped on display shelves. The shop’s ceiling had swags of fir boughs and simple red balls, which strongly resembled ball gags. Rich people's sex stores were next level.

A woman in a severe black dress and heels walked over from behind the counter but directed her words to Gabriel. “How can I help you, Sir?”

“My boy needs little related items.” She nodded at Gabriel, smiled warmly at me, and directed us to follow her deeper into the displays.

Once the momentary shock of his words passed, I preened like a spoiled house cat.

“We received a shipment of some clothing perfect for winter. We also added some lifestyle supplies that aren't specifically winter-themed but absolutely adorable. There is some furniture on hand, but most people special order. If you prefer custom items, we have a list of custom artists in the region who are discreet and incredibly talented.” She turned to me and said, “Adorable boys need adorable toys.”

Gabriel squeezed my fingers at her words. I wasn’t exactly sure how I felt about being referred to as a boy, but the lightness coursing through my veins had to mean something.

The saleswoman brought us to a section tucked away in the back of the store. They’d set it up like an old-fashioned nursery. There was a crib with a ballerina mobile and a twin bed with a comforter decorated with toy soldiers. A bookcase in the corner overflowed with books that I itched to comb through. In the opposite corner was an oversized rocking chair with an extra sturdy frame for the weight of multiple adults. The floor was covered by a rug in a riotous kaleidoscope pattern. Off to one side was an oversized bean bag chair in corduroy that was perfect for reading. On the opposite end was a low table with chairs and floor pillows around it. This setup was next level.

“Bunny, do you see anything you like?” Gabriel asked me while I continued to clutch his hand. I was reluctant to let go until someone forced me to keep my hands to myself.

“Daddy, can I look at the books?” I could hear the shyness in my voice, and peeked up at him through my lashes. Gabriel nodded yes, and I plopped down next to the bookcase, crossed-legged style, and started flipping through them. When one grabbed my attention, I pulled it out and stacked it on the floor next to me. When my stack threatened to topple over, I gathered them together and moved to the beanbag chair. All the books I picked were picture books, and it had been approximately eleventy years since I had a reason to read one. I hadn’t realized until this exact moment how much I missed them.

While I was occupied with the books, Daddy looked through the notions in the dresser and some clothing. Every once in a while, I’d look up at him from the floor to make sure he was still there. We smiled at each other like a couple of weirdos, and my tummygot butterflies, and I didn’t know what was happening to me. I felt giddy and silly and happy and safe.

My life hasn't ever been unsafe. My parents still don’t understand how their child turned out so thoroughly different from them, but they loved me all the same and never had an issue with me being gay. I had Anders, the best friend in the entire universe. My job was super fulfilling and I loved it. I had choices about Uncle Tobias’s house, even if I disliked the options. My life was fine. But when I was around Gabriel, I felt something difficult to put into words. Safe was close, but not quite it.

Contentment. I felt content.

At some point, I curled into a ball to read more comfortably but fell asleep instead. I woke up when Daddy crouched next to me, and his fingers lightly massaged my scalp. O.M.G. Shivers sparked through my entire body at the touch of his fingertips on my skin. After a bit, he threaded his fingers through my hair and tousled my curls. Without a coherent thought, I moaned deep in my chest. I could stay here forever.

“Sleeping Beauty, it’s time to wake up.” I made protesting noises because I’d never felt more relaxed in my entire life.

“Daddy, no. It’s sleep time.” A part of my brain recognized I wasn't speaking in an adult mindset, but another told the first part to hush and mind its own business. The second side won the round.

“Bunnies don’t sleep in stores, silly.”

I opened one eye and peered up at him with a cheeky grin. “This one does.”

“Ok, sleepy bunny, stay awake long enough for me to ask you some questions. All I need is yes or no.” I nodded my agreement and sat up straighter on the beanbag chair.

Daddy had a few shirts with silly slogans, but I already had a ton of those, so I declined them all. I was on a roll of no when he picked up a pair of dark blue fleece coveralls. I gasped. If I had pearls to clutch, I would’ve at the sheer cuteness of the outfit in his hands.

On the front was a pocket embroidered with a dragon and a knight roasting marshmallows together using the dragon’s fire. The matching shirt was a repeated pattern of them walking through the forest together. I loved everything about it. When Gabriel showed it to me, I reverently traced the design. I folded it back up and decisively placed it in my lap. This outfit was coming home with me, one way or another. Daddy smirked but didn’t say a word.

Daddy picked pajamas for me to consider. They were adult-sized pajamas, but cut in a younger style with ribbed cuffs on the wrists and ankles. They were reasonably close to the sleep pants and T-shirts I currently use. Some were more of a stretch and were a footie style. All but one had a zipper, but the last in the pile snapped up in the front. The last one caused me the most pause. I kept running my fingers over the snaps while I lookedback and forth between them and Daddy. He said nothing while I sat and processed the idea of wearing snapped footie pajamas. The motifs were the standard cars, trains, and trucks. They were fine but didn’t do much for me, and I declined them. He nodded like he wasn’t mad and put them in a discarded pile. The pirates and ships were adorable, too, but they didn’t keep my attention. However, when I saw a knights’ jousting design on a pair, I clapped my hands in excitement. “Daddy! Daddy! Look at these! They are so cute… I love them!”

Daddy laughed and cupped my jaw. “Those are the ones you get.”

I leaned into his touch and let my cheek rest against his warm skin. The butterflies were back in my tummy, and I wanted them to stay forever.

“Bunny, remember, you can say no to anything.” With some apprehension, I nodded yes and tried to be patient to see what else he wanted to show me. Gabriel handed me a small stack of colorful cloth.

Training pants.

I blew out a breath and reached my hand out to touch them. I didn’t know things like this existed, but I could admit to myself they were objectively cute. The material was thicker all over, but extra thick in the crotch. The edges were trimmed in bright colors and matched the design. Like the pajamas, the designs were mostly sailboats and firetrucks. I traced my fingers onthem but said nothing. I looked at Daddy and asked, “Do you want me to wear them?”

Daddy took a breath before he answered my question carefully. “I think it might help keep you in a little mindset.” He added with a lowered voice, “And, yes, I would like you to wear them.”

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