Page 24 of Wrecked for the Holidays

“What does that mean?” I occupied myself with straightening the training pants stacked on the modular storage unit next to us. I feared he’d clam up on me if I gave too much direct attention.

“We did get a gift or two. I think my parents mostly didn’t want the hassle of not having them. But they were always practical sorts of things. A new textbookor hygiene stuff, sometimes clothes, but never any of the fun kind. It was the same for birthdays. My parents have good careers and aren’t religious, so it wasn’t about that.”

“Love, your family confuses me. I don’t understand how not celebrating stuff was supposed to keep you focused. We all need breaks.”

“I think part of it was because I questioned so much.” He shrugged. “It’s not like I would’ve believed in Santa Claus or the Tooth Fairy for long anyway. My brothers aren’t dumb or anything, but something flipped in my parents when they figured out I was acertified genius.” Jakob whispered the last part like it was something to be ashamed of. “Once that happened, it was all about ensuring I lived up to my fullest potential, and nothing, even things like regular kid stuff or friends or siblings, was allowed to interfere with it. So there you go—the entire reason I’m a little in a nutshell.”

“Well, that works out pretty well for me.” I gave Jakob another forehead kiss and then one on his nose because I could. “The last thing we need to get is some fun little clothes because boys should have fun stuff, right?”

“You’re r-r-r-right,” Jakob said with his best tiger impression. “But I’d like to point out that I can buy my own clothes.”

“And I’d like to point out that I’ve already said doing it makes me happy.”

“You know, at some point, we are going to need to talk about rent and utilities and all that grown-up stuff people who are roommates should talk about.”

“That’s a conversation for another day. Today, we only have to figure out whether you want overalls and if they should be denim or cotton.”

With that, I pulled Jakob off the chair to go through the little clothes available at the store. He wouldn’t say yes to as much as I wanted him to, but I didn’t even ask when I saw the jockstrap withPapa’s Boyprinted across the band. That one was coming home with us. We were having a heated discussion about how many shorts and play shirts were too many when the salesperson joined us.

“Gentlemen, it looks like you found plenty today,” he said with a nod to our pile.

“Yes, but someone over here thinks play clothes aren’t needed,” I responded with a finger wag in Jakob’s direction.

“Oh, absolutely, they are needed! Sure, getting into little space in regular adult clothes is possible, but it’s so much easier when your outsides match your insides.” The salesperson paused. “Maybe the issue is that the options in this section aren’t quite your style?” He opened a different wardrobe with a flourish.

“Ohhhh, those are pretty,” sighed Jakob before he smacked his hand over his mouth to prevent any other wayward words from escaping.

“Aren’t they adorable?” the assistant agreed. “There’s nothing unusual about preferring non-stereotypical choices while in little space. We like to provide options for all our customers.”

It was obvious Jakob desperately wanted to take a closer look at the options but rocked back and forth on his heels in a bid to keep himself away from them.

“Thanks so much for showing us these. My boy and I will take a look.”

There was no mistaking the heat in Jakob’s eyes at my label for him. Yeah, it was early, but this thing was a relationship. Logic said to slow down and pace ourselves, but fuck that. I wanted to revel in it.

When we were alone again, I pulled out options in pinks, purples, and light greens. Jakob smiled at the flowers and the delicate colors. He traced the patterns of the teapots and cups with puppies and kittens. When I showed him the rainbow mermen and their fishy friends, he nearly squealed with excitement.

“Jakob, do you like these outfits better?”

“Papa, I’m not supposed to like these.”

“Why not?” I took a deep breath before I asked my next question. I knew before I said it that we were about to get into some gendered bullshit about being girly. “Did someone say you’re not allowed to like them?”

“Maybe.”

“That’s bullshit. If pink makes you happy, wear pink. If you want lace, wear lace. It’s just clothes or makeup or whatever. Do what makes you happy.”

Jakob looked at the options before pulling out a lavender onesie with tiny flowers that was cut for a man’s shape. “Do you like this one?”

“Doyoulike it?” Jakob’s tentative smile was all I needed to see. “I think you do, and we’re getting it.”

Jakob’s small smile turned beaming. He surged forward and wrapped himself around me in a tight squeeze. “Papa, it’s the prettiest thing I’ve ever had.”

I wrapped my arms around him and squeezed him just as tight. I’d buy him a million flowered onesies if it meant I could see that much happiness in him. By the time we were done with this section, I had an enthusiastic Jakob who’d found all sorts of cute options. His little preferences ran toward soft clothing in even softer colors.

Once I saw his enthusiasm for the new options, I wondered what a playroom for him would look like. It would need a tea set, but maybe he’d like an English garden theme where he could have all the pretty colors and flowers around him. He wasn’t a truck and spaceship boy, but rather a sunshine and woodland creature sort. Lucky for me, a friend from the local kink club was a commercial designer who took on private clients as a side gig. It would be impossible to get everything set up by Christmas, but maybe I could speak to Owen about finding time after the new year.

The sales guy was damn good at his job because he magically appeared as we were wrapping up our choices. The pile in front of us was too big to carry into the next store, so I planned to troop back out to the car to stow it away and then go to the next shop.

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