Page 81 of Every Heartbeat After

He shakes his head. “But not if you don’t turn me in. No one is looking for me here. You could help me. Come on, bro.”

I straighten and fist a hand in my hair. “You’re kidding me, right? You do realize I’m literally a cop. Or did the sheriff’s cruiser out front not jog your memory?”

Gage pales, the gaunt angles of his malnourished face suddenly becoming even more pronounced. Drugs have done a hell of a job with him. He was a handsome kid. Charming, when he wanted to be. If he’d made different choices, I imagine he could be married by now with a good job in something like sales, using his conniving ways to be a productive member of society at least.

“I’m your brother. You wouldn’t turn me in.” His voice warbles, but the conviction is clear in his eyes. As much as he knows I value my career, he also stands firm in the knowledge that I’ve always sacrificed everything to save his skin. Why would he think this time would be any different?

Will it be? Could I, honest to God, turn him in, knowing the fate that awaits him? I’ve worked in and around prisons for years. Gage is not some hardened criminal—I’ve never let it come to that. He’s an overgrown child who wouldn’t know a consequence if it slapped him in the face. The prison system would eat him alive.

Sure, my parents were happy to finally be let in on what’s happening, but could they ever forgive me for condemning their little boy to that fate?

I feel myself wavering. Falling back into old ways. But all I see when I close my eyes is a mother and son battered and bruised in their car. I think of Tess and her parents, and I swallow hard. This was not a victimless crime. And if I allow him to continue on this path, how long before he destroys more lives than just his own?

I shake my head. It’s all too much. Too heavy. And despite everything, I can’t bring myself to call our parents. Not when I can barely get a grip on myself.

I grab my keys from the counter and fist them so hard my hands scream for relief from the stabbing pain. “I’m going to get dinner. Don’t go any-fucking-where. Do you understand?”

Gage’s shoulders slump with relief and he nods vigorously. He thinks the argument is over, that he’s won. His big brother has saved the day yet again.

I slam the door behind me, cutting across the driveway to my deputy SUV in several quick strides. If he decides to run, the last thing I need is for him to hot-wire my work vehicle.

I send a silent apology to my Hellcat as I pull out of the driveway and head for the only place I can think to go.

ChapterThirty-Three

Kit

I’m quickly redirectedto Nomads by Tomas’s concerned-looking wife, who answered their door without so much as a question as to why I was frantically knocking at my boss’s house acting like I was the one running from the law. At the bar, I parallel park in a miracle of a space in the street right out front. It’s Friday night, and the place is rightfully slammed. I pause just outside the door, listening to the thrum of music and blending voices as I steel myself. I haven’t so much as gone to the bathroom since I made it back to Loveless—I have no clue how I even look. Though based on the flash of worry in Tomas’s eyes as I approach once inside, I’m betting on pretty damn disheveled.

“Rookie.” He nods. “Wasn’t planning on seeing you till tomorrow.” His normally gruff voice is softened at the edges. A line has formed between his dark brows. I feel him taking my measure, so I forcibly school my expression into one of cool indifference. The one I normally reserve for interrogations.

Gary appears from behind Tomas, leaning back in his barstool to lay eyes on me. “Look what the cat dragged in. The silver-tongued snake who seduced my niece!” He cackles at his own joke, clasping his heart with an open palm as he shakes with laughter.

Thankfully Zoey’s not on bar duty tonight. It’s one of the newer bartenders who doesn’t yet recognize us well enough to insert herself into our business. She’s busy chatting with a couple seated at the far end of the counter, not sparing us a glance even after Gary’s outburst. A small blessing, but a welcome one nonetheless.

The truth is, I’ve been teetering on an edge this entire week, and with everything that’s happened this evening, the mention of Tess is enough to tip me over into outright despair. She never responded to my text. Not that I expected her to, exactly, but it was a further reminder that she’s not here with me. That whatever we had is on pause, perhaps indefinitely, and I can’t wait around for her soft touch or a disarming kiss to save me from this hell of my own making.

I try to smile at Gary. Really, I do. But my face, my entire body feels like it’s made of stone. I could collapse into a heap right here and sleep for days. Maybe by the time I woke, this would all have worked itself out, and I’d be spared from a decision that feels impossible to make.

“I—” I start, but my voice cracks and falters. I wet my lips. Tomas elbows his friend, pinning him with a look that I can’t see from where I stand. Whatever it is, it wipes the grin right off Gary’s face.

“Sorry, boy,” Gary says. “She’s a hard one to leave, huh?”

You have no idea,I want to say. I dig a Sperry-clad toe into the wooden floor. “Have you heard from her?”

His bushy gray eyebrows lift. “Have you not?”

I shake my head. It’s short. Quick. Heartbreaking enough to admit. I’m not trying to drag things out.

Gary’s eyes are a shade of blue so light they might as well be silver. Understanding fills them. Crinkles form at the edges as he winces and nods. “She’ll come around. You just gotta give her time.”

Tomas clears his throat, drawing both our attention. He quirks a brow. “That’s not why you’re here looking like someone pissed in your cornflakes, though, is it?”

Leave it to him to cut to the chase. I glance around at the crowd, finally spotting Zoey chatting with a booth full of regulars. She catches my gaze and narrows her eyes, but I shrug off her attention. I can tell she wants to pry, but her hospitable spirit won’t let her break away from the conversation.

The bar is far too crowded, and my nerves too raw, to get into this here.

“Can we talk outside, actually?”

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