Page 82 of King of Hearts

Cooper:Ha! Wondered what happened there. So, she didn’t write that shit. Send us the original.

Sebastian:We all know he hasn’t read it. Always has been a sucker for punishment.

Jack:I’m the last one to give advice – but I think you should listen, Cap, and read what she actually wrote.

Andy:Fuck off.

I swirled my drink before taking a sip. That damn envelope buried deep in the footy bag at my feet. I should just switch off my phone and go to bed. Nothing good was going to come from decisions made in the early hours of the morning after a loss like tonight.

The screen lit up as all three of the fuckers laugh reacted to my message. The pricks enjoyed my misery and reminding me about it whenever they got the chance. Finishing the shot, I poured another and headed to my bedroom as my phone buzzed again, this time a private message from Seb.

Sebastian:It’s been a long fucking night over here, mate, but I will come to your house now if it means you will pull your head out of your arse. Just read the damn thing and either move the fuck on or grow a pair and call her. I’d rather take your money on Monday and not feel bad about how much of a sad loser you are right now. Read it, brother, and good or bad, we’ve got you.

I paused, glancing back to the bag. I should throw the envelope away and forget about the last six months. Forget she ever existed and get my head back into the game I know and love. I don’t owe her anything. I don’t owe any of them anything. But I would be lying if I wasn’t a little curious. Closure was a fickle thing but one which could help snap this dark fucking cloud which was hovering above and give me the space to move forward.

Before I changed my mind, I opened my bag and took out the papers Flick handed me earlier. I would read it once and then throw it away, along with the memories. If I had learned anything, it was that trusting people only led to heartache. Fanning the sheets across the bench, I took a deep breath and immersed myself in her head for the very last time.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Andy

Behind the Headlines:Humanising Athletes

and Revealing their pureHEARTS

Article written by Arnabelle Frost

In the world of professional sports, athletes often findthemselves under the microscope of intense scrutiny – both on andoff the field. When a team, such as the SydneyHearts, becomes embroiled in a scandal where illicit substances aretaken, the media frenzy that follows can often overshadow themorals of the players involved.

But, amidst the sensational headlinesand clickbait, it’s crucial to remember that these athletesare not fictional characters in a novel – they are humanbeings subject to the same pressures and temptations as anyoneelse. Me included if I’m truthful – and if youare honest with yourselves – possibly many of you?

Shadowing eachof these sports stars is a story – a narrative deeperthan the surface-level shock and disappointment. A story thatinvolves love and laughter. Perseverance despite setbacks and injuries. Familieswho support and cheer but aren’t always around asplayers spend months of the year travelling the country. Havethey found themselves drafted and playing first grade without anyhard work – of course not. They’ve spent hundreds ofweekends and thousands of afternoons training with blood, sweat andtears splattered on the grass, so spectators have something towatch on tv – or even live – if they are luckyenough.

It seems easy to say the Sydney Hearts arenow in tatters – their reputation coloured with scandal, but thatwould be a startlinghyperbole. Additionally, it would be vacuousof me not to acknowledge the conflict of interest orperceived bias in me personally writing this piece, because ashalf of Sydney already knows, Andrew Gloss, captain of theteam in question, is the man I love. Furthermore, Iwas at the amazing nightspot – Nexus (honestly, it’s currentlythe most underrated club in the city) – at the timethis misdemeanour took place,

Now, it is essential to understandthe factors which may lead these individuals down a pathwhich involves the use of illicit drugs. So, let’snot bore you all with over-hyped, disingenuous sentences, let’s just state the facts:

• A Sydney Hearts Football playerwas seen using cocaine at a popular (again, underrated) nightspot

• Thisplayer, Jayson Towlson, has since medically retired from theteam and accepts full responsibility for any hurt and shamebrought to the club because of his actions

• Captain, AndrewGloss, and teammate Jack Grant were also in attendance, alongwith some other friends and family, however, did NOT engagein or encourage drug use

• The reasons behind these actionsare complex and multifaceted and those involved are not justfootballer players but people with feelings.

It seems, as asociety, we are guilty of holding professional football players toan incredibly high standard. They’re expected to perform atthe peak of their physical and mental prowess while maintainingan image of unblemished perfection. However, the reality is thatthey are susceptible to the same vulnerabilities as anyone elseand the relentless pressure to succeed can sometimes push individualsto seek solace in harmful coping mechanisms. Unfortunately, including illegalsubstances.

We could also be more reasonable here; remove thefootball title and again remember they are also just youngmen on their own learning journey. Does this mean weencourage drug or substance abuse – absolutely not – but it wouldbe remiss if we didn’t remember we are allhuman regardless of our profession. Except, most of us donot have people following us around with cameras, waiting, hopingeven, for us to screw up.

Luckily, the Hearts havean incredible pastoral system; one which supports its players, theirfamilies, friends and supporters. In the messy aftermath of adrug scandal such as this, it is crucial to re-examine this system and appreciate the mental health supports thatneed to be in place. These are the things we, as a society, are not aware of until the curtainis opened and we are invited into the fold.

So, for those who are not as fortunate as I, letme give you the inside scoop of the Sydney Hearts.

The team is a tight knit unit. They support eachother wholeheartedly. They are led by a brilliant cast ofcoaches, medical personnel, dieticians, agents and fitness coaches. Head ofthose players is their captain – Andrew Gloss. Tall, unbelievably sexyand – oops, I digress (and am only half-kidding). Seriouslythough, Andy diligently leads that team despite the censorious garbagewhich is frequently published about him with absolutely no substanceor truth. He rallies his teammates in both the timesof success and the times of struggle and he wearsit all with his HEART on his sleeve.Also, hereis the real scoop, Sydney – listen closely – because he isreading this very public declaration along with the rest ofyou – I am a woman in love. Yes, I amin love with Andrew Gloss.

I digress though, because importantly, amid this drug debacle, we must all remember that atthe end of the day, we only know about thisbecause those involved play football. They do not make ourlaws or enact governmental policy. They do not conduct surgeriesor provide medical advice. They put their bodies on theline, every week, for the entertainment of others. So, let’s make that the focus. Let’s talk more aboutJay Towlson and why he retired. Let’s raise awarenesson the horrors of concussion and why THIS should bewhat we are all discussing.

My own laugh surprised me as I looked up from the papers spread across my kitchen counter. It was well into the early hours of the morning – but I was wide awake. Not only had my self-pretentiousness stopped me from reading this a week ago, but I could no longer blame anyone other than myself for the ache which sat heavy in my chest every second of the day.

---