Page 27 of Married to the Alien Mountain Man

“He is looking at her the way that Garrek looks at you!” he growled. “His eyes are white! And his eyes areneverwhite!”

“What do you mean, they’re never white?” I asked in confusion. “That’s… That’s literally the colour they are. Just like yours.”

“My eyes are not white,” Killian cried, sounding very offended for a boy whose eyes were… well… white. “They are brown, like Magnolia’s! With some lighter gold in the middle!”

“Oh. Alright. Well, that’s… nice,” I said awkwardly. I wasn’t really sure what to say in the face of the kid’s delusion. I decided it was probably better not to correct him, because being wrong about his own eye colour seemed very important to him for some reason.

But Magnolia only confused me further when she said, “He’s right. No Zabrian actually has white eyes.”

“Exactly!” Killian said, his white eyes indignant.

“I…” I quieted my voice, only speaking to Magnolia. “I feel like I’m being gaslit right now.”

Magnolia chuckled. “I know. It’s a lot. Has Tasha sent you her notes yet?”

“No. Not yet.”

“Here. Take out your comms tablet,” she said. “I’ll add you to the group chat.”

13

JAYA

Magnolia Jones Added G. Jaya to the Group

Darcy Dubois Changed the Group Name toCock Tail Hour

Incoming Tablet Communication Cherry Dawson:Cock tail hour? I approve.

Incoming Tablet Communication Darcy Dubois:Cocktail emoji loading

Incoming Tablet Communication Darcy Dubois:Tentacle emoji loading

Incoming Tablet Communication Darcy Dubois:Thank you. It felt fitting. Also, welcome, G. Jaya, whoever you are.

Incoming Tablet Communication Tasha Wallace:Welcome, Jaya!

Outgoing Tablet Communication G. Jaya:Thank you!

Incoming Tablet Communication Magnolia Jones:Jaya is my new friend. She’s also technically Oaken’s wife. For now, anyway.

Incoming Tablet Communication Cherry Dawson:???

Incoming Tablet Communication Darcy Dubois:I’m with Cherry.I, too, would like to know, ???

Incoming Tablet Communication Tasha Wallace:Jaya ran into some trouble with her ship and landed in the mountains near Oaken’s property. Unfortunately, under Zabrian law, she isn’t allowed to stay here long enough to fix it unless she marries someone. Oaken has selflessly volunteered to assist. She will be remaining with us on Zabria Prinar One for the two-week marriage trial period while her ship undergoes repairs.

Incoming Tablet Communication Cherry Dawson:Oh my GOD.

Incoming Tablet Communication Darcy Dubois:HAHAHA Oaken “selflessly” volunteered. Suuuuuure.

Outgoing Tablet Communication G. Jaya:What’s that supposed to mean?

Incoming Tablet Communication Darcy Dubois:That dude’s been dying for a wife.

Incoming Tablet Communication Magnolia Jones:It’s true…

Incoming Tablet Communication Darcy Dubois:Begging for a wife. Praying for one. Crossing all his Zabrian fingers and toesies for one.

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