Page 75 of Wicked Surrender

There were no more instances of her dismissing me.

And it felt like fucking heaven—so long as I ignored how I was supposed to hurt her to get back at her dad.

Goddammit.

The second my brain went there, I felt like the weight of the world was on me all over again.

I couldn’t give up on this vendetta against Dean Chen and what he did to William. It wasn’t fair to my brother, and it wasn’t who I was. I was his brother, and he should count on me to look out for him and avenge any wrongs done to him.

If Chen had at least given that whole cheating thing a proper investigation, it all would’ve been different. But he hadn’t even listened to me when I asked. My parents didn’t give a damn, just taking that man’s word for it that William had to be expelled, according to his rule. They were quick to cut William off, no argument allowed.

If I were to lose my spot here on campus, they’d give me the same dismissive regard they gave him. Period.

The rest of my walk back to the frat house was full of anxious worries and guesses of what I could do.

Giving up what I was exploring with Laura was out of the question. Since we’d both fallen and taken the risk to get together, I couldn’t imagine not having her there to make me smile or tempt me to take out my anger on her in a way she enjoyed, in a way that had her coming so hard each time.

But giving up on my brother wouldn’t bode well either. I’d never forgive myself.

Back at the frat house, I found Dennis and Kevin in the kitchen, cracking up over the videos they’d taken at the Professors’ Nightmares party and were checking out the new stitches and comments on them.

They showed me one of the drinking game they’d dubbed in Laura’s “honor”. The one they’d called Second-Best. Before the reel ended, it shifted into one of those deep fake videos of her on a pool table with a bong.

I shoved the phone down, not in any fucking mood to see all those derogatory remarks. It wasn’t her, and I knew that, but that was beside the point. It had been made to attack her, and it twisted me up inside. Anger cut through me, and I bit my lip until I tasted blood just so I wouldn’t tell them to cut it out.

“Isn’t it hilarious?” Kevin asked, shaking his head like this was the best comedy he’d ever seen.

You fucking moron.

I wasn’t only stuck having to pick between my brother and my… tutor, but now I felt like I had to stand with either Laura or my friends.

Ignoring them the best I could, I got some things to bring to my room for a late dinner. All I could hope for was that they wouldn’t notice I didn’t join in on bullying her as much. It had become more entertaining to tease her privately and only keep up with minimal harassment on campus.

But what else could I do?

I couldn’t turn around suddenly and tell them to knock it off when I was the one who encouraged them to go after her in the first place.

They’d want to know why I was changing my mind about her. They’d get curious and dig for more answers. Admitting to them that I was secretly fucking her wouldn’t end well. Because confessing that big secret to anyone would ultimately lead to my explaining that I was starting to genuinely care about her.

A thin line stood to mark the difference between love and hate, and we’d blurred that border so much that it was impossible to sort out the opposites anymore.

More than that, my friends wouldn’t understand why I was willingly choosing to be with a member of the Chen family. They were all there when I faced the hell of William being expelled.

Leaving them to their comments and jokes felt cowardly. The mood lingered when I went up to my room to eat alone.

Just as I finished, my phone rang with an unidentified number. I answered, figuring it was a spam call, but even that distraction would pull me out of thinking about the knot of indecision between Laura and Willaim.

“Hello?” I answered.

“Hi, this is Faith. I’m a nurse at Jonas General.”

My heart sped up. The food I just ate turned to stone.

Jonas General was a hospital near the lousy area of town that William had been living in.

Fuck!I braced myself for bad news. That was the only reason a nurse from a hospital would call. I visited that place before, for a career day thing, but this wasn’t about that. This had to be something bad. I felt it in my bones. This tension that kicked in made my skin feel too tight and stretched, and my lungs couldn’t fill fast enough. It was the same way I had felt when I got word about William’s expulsion.

Once I confirmed that I was who she was looking for, she dropped the bomb.

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