Page 12 of Stay With Me

“Yeah. I’m sure,” Emily frowns. “I’m not that hungry, anyway.”

Though it doesn’t feel like the right thing to do, Trina and I get in my truck and leave for the pizza parlor. A tight sensation in the pit of my stomach accompanies my worry that whatever Teddy needs to talk to Emily about might rob her of that light and joy she had when she spoke about her future on the drive home today.

CHAPTER6

EMILY

My hands shake as I watch Trina and Charlie drive away. I know something is up with Teddy—he’s always been easy for me to read. When he’s happy, he’s usually elated. But when he’s upset, sad, or stressed, it’s written all over his face and radiates from his tense posture. That’s the Teddy I see today.

“Let’s go sit on the back porch. I’ll grab us some sweet tea, okay?” I smile at Teddy, trying to ease whatever burden it is that he carries. He nods at me, and we head into the house.

Teddy continues through to the porch to wait for me, and I make my way to the kitchen to get our drinks.

“It’s fine Emily. Obviously, something happened and he’s upset, but I’m sure he didn’t lose his job or something that bad. Even if he did, you have a good job starting soon. It’ll be fine,” I mutter to myself while pouring our tea.

When I get out back, Teddy is sitting on the edge of one of Trina’s patio chairs staring straight ahead. I set his glass of tea on the table between the chairs and sit down. It’s a gorgeous August day, not too hot and a light breeze in the air. The distant sound of children at play in the neighborhood surrounds us.

“Here you go. I added some extra sugar, just how you like it.”

Teddy looks over at me, and I notice the dark shadows under his eyes, the redness rimming his lids.

“Thanks.” His voice is a near whisper.

Teddy takes a sip of his tea, swallows, then clears his throat. He stares at the ground.

“I have to tell you something. And it’s bad, babe. Terrible.” His clasped hands rest on his lap, trembling.

Never, in all the years I’ve known him, have I seen him like this.

Suddenly, I can’t hear the children anymore. I can only hear the pounding of my heart in my ears.

“Teddy, what is it? You’re… You’re scaring me. Are you sick? Are you in trouble?”

A harsh, sarcastic laugh escapes him, and he runs his hand through his hair.

“Sick. Yeah, that’s one way to put it, but not in the way you’re thinking.”

He takes a deep breath, lifts his head, and turns to look at me.

I focus my gaze on his face as I look for some hint of what he’s going to say, like knowing a split second before he says it might somehow lessen how bad the news is.

He takes one of my hands in his. “Em, I love you with everything I am. My heart, my soul… my body. I want you to remember that when I tell you what I did.”

A film of moisture is building in his eyes and I my stomach drops.

“Teddy, please?—”

“Wait. Please let me get this out while I have the nerve,” he says.

I nod and he sighs.

“I’ve been very down this summer, worse than I ever have been before. I hid it from you the two times you came home, but it’s been almost unbearable.” He lets go of my hand and stands, then paces back and forth across the porch. The creaking of the wooden floorboards under his feet is deafening.

I glue my eyes to him, watching his face, his mannerisms, memorizing everything about him before he tells me something that I fear might change how I look at him.

“Last Friday, I got in another big blow-up with my parents and my dad uninvited me from my mom’s fiftieth birthday party.”

“God, Teddy. I’m so sorry.”