Page 73 of Hard Knock Hero

“Jessi likes you.”

I met his penetrating gaze with my own. I had nothing to hide. Jessi was an adult. If she wanted to share her bed with me, that wasn’t her brother’s concern. “I like her too. A lot.”

“Thanks for being here for her. When I couldn’t.”

I nodded and went back to dry-rubbing the pork. I hadn’t expected him to say that, but I appreciated hearing it. In fact, I was relieved.

It shouldn’t have mattered what her brother thought of me. I would’ve sworn up and down that I didn’t care. But as soon as he’d said thank you, I felt how much it did matter to me. Because this guy was Jessi’s family. Somebody she loved, no matter how complicated their relationship may have been in the past.

Everything about Jessi mattered to me. So much that I didn’t know how to deal with it. These possessive, protective feelings she evoked in me.

The past few days that I’d spent in Hartley, it had felt like the rest of my life was on hold. But that would change tomorrow. I had my job with the catering company. My family. A bride and groom counting on me to feed their wedding guests. If I didn’t show up in Steamboat Springs by Friday afternoon, a lot of people would be scrambling, and they didn’t deserve that.

But if it had been anything less, I wasn’t sure what choice I’d make. Whether I might ask Jessi if she wanted me to stay. Just a few days more. Maybe a week. At least until this mess with Jeremy and the Rigsbys was sorted out.

I didn’t like leaving things unfinished.

I also didn’t consider it my job to run around the world playing police. That was Jake’s style, not mine. Even though Icertainlydidn’t like the idea of Dale, Chester and the other Rigsby assholes getting away with illegal shit, because nobody should get away with that.

But for Jessi, I wanted to make everything right. To stop the bad guys and make her smile.

I wanted to be her damnhero.

I hardly recognized myself.

“I know there’s a lot I missed over the last few years,” Trace said. “I haven’t been the best brother.”

“Jessi kept things to herself.”

“But I suspect that’s my fault more than hers.”

We were speaking quietly, but I glanced into the dining room to make sure that Jessi wasn’t in earshot. She was still talking with Scarlett over in the corner.

“Has she told you about the hospital?” I asked. “And what it’s been like for her in Hartley since then?”

“She told me a little bit when she called me a couple weeks ago, asking me to come out to Colorado. I looked up the court filings and police reports. I know what they said.”

I didn’t ask how he managed to get access to all of that. Some of it was public record. Not all. But I figured that in Trace’s usual line of work, access to documents wasn’t a difficult thing. I also didn’t bother to ask because there was no way he’d talk about it. Trace’s past wasn’t my concern. But his future? That was.

I washed my hands, then turned to face him. “Are you going to be here for her the next time she needs you?”

He brushed long strands of hair out of his face. “Whatever Jessi needs from me, I’m in. I’m not planning to go back. I need a new start myself, and I’m not… I’m not in the best place in my own head. But I’m going to take care of my sister. I guarantee that.”

I should’ve been glad to hear it. Iwasglad. Jessi needed her brother.

But when I pictured Jessi here in Hartley, and me back in California moving on with my life, I didn’t like the image. Not one bit. Even though I didn’t see any possible alternative.

* * *

Once the pork was roasting low and slow in the oven, and the rolls were rising, I went upstairs for a shower. I hadn’t cleaned up since the day before. The warm water sluiced over my head and shoulders, down my stomach. I scrubbed shampoo through my hair, my thumbs rubbing circles at my temples.

I’d hoped the tumult of thoughts in my brain would calm under the water. But I’d been wrong.

I was calculating the exact amount of time I needed to get to Steamboat. Just under five hours. If I skipped making any stops, I could stay a little longer in Hartley tomorrow. Get going before lunch…and maybe I could call ahead and give my sous chef more instructions to get things started without me…

This was not like me. At all.

Yet how many times had I told myself that same thing since I’d met Jessi? When would I get it through my skull that shewasn’tlike anyone else? Not to me. The way I felt about her was different. Overwhelming.