Page 43 of The One for Forever

My stomach is twisting into knots. I can’t decide whether to cry or throw up.

I jump to standing, grab my phone, and call Lark. She’s the only person in the world who knows how I feel about Rex. The only person I can talk to about this.

Well. Now Rex knows my secret too. Right?

Nausea rears into my throat as Lark answers. “Hey, just the lady I was thinking of,” she says. “I was about to call you. Danny is on-shift and I could really use an ice cream fix to soothe my sorrows. You in?”

“I kissed Rex.”

A pause. “Oh. Wow. Okay. And?—”

I pace across my office, ignoring the fallen papers. “He kissed me back.”

“That’s great! But why do you sound like that’s the worst thing ever?”

“Because things got heated, we got carried away, and then he freaked out! He regrets it. He couldn’t even look at me afterward.” I squeeze my eyes closed. “What did I do?” I moan. “I think he hates me.”

“There’s no way he hates you.”

“Then he hates himself for kissing me back. Maybe that’s worse.”

Either way, I screwed up.

For those few wonderful minutes that we were kissing, it felt like all my dreams were coming true. It didn’t make sense that Rex suddenly wanted me back, but it didn’t matter. I was flying.

And now, I’ve crashed and burned. I’m a heap of wreckage, my hopes and dreams hollowed out. And it hurts. It’s a black hole of hurting, big enough to suck the rest of me down inside it. I’m eighteen again, the sad girl on prom night, but times a thousand.

Rex isn’t going to swoop in and comfort me this time. I’d be shocked if he ever wants to see me again. Unless he wants to act like it didn’t happen. I don’t think I can do that.

“Lark,” I whisper. “Please say something. I’m spiraling.”

“I’m coming over there. Are you home? Or at your office?”

“My office, but don’t come yet. I need to calm down first.”

“Then tell me exactly what happened. Start at the beginning.”

So I do. I put on my lawyer hat and tell the story, as if it’s my opening statement and I’m reciting the facts for the jury. The strange looks Rex has been giving me for the last two weeks, and the way he acted today. Like he was jealous of the thought of me with anyone else.

I don’t want to hear about you with other men.

“He actually said that?” Lark breathes. “That is romantic. And hot. Seriously, I’m fanning myself over here.”

“Not really helping, babe. I made a fool of myself. I told him I’m into older men! Basically confessing my crush on him. And then I kissed him and practically ordered him to kiss me back.”

“You hardly forced him. If Rex kissed you, it’s because he wanted to. And you said it got heated?”

“Very. He had me on my back on my desk. I felt his erection.”

“Nice.”

“No! It’s not nice, because we heard someone coming down the hall, and it was like a switch flipped. He’d been caught up in the moment. But as soon as he stopped and thought about it, about the fact that it wasme, he was horrified. Then he started apologizing. He said it waswrong. And then he left. He couldn’t escape fast enough.” I slide down to the floor, wrapping my armsaround my knees. “I kissed Cliff’s dad. It was the best kiss of my entire life, and he wishes it never happened. I am such a fool.”

Lark sighs. “I’m going to swing by the store, buy out their supply of Ben & Jerry’s, and then I’m coming to pick you up. You can stay at my place and watch terrible comedies with me all night. And I promise, Quinn. It’s going to be okay. You are going to be okay.”

A tear slips down my cheek. “I don’t feel like it.”

“I know how that is, trust me. But you’re strong. You can make it through anything. Stay there. I’ll be at your office in half an hour.”

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