Page 143 of Starcrossed Colorado

I wasn’t sure yet that I would. It probably would help. Iknewit would help. Then again, when I wrote down exactly what I’d gone through that night, I didn’t want to put it in the journal Ashford had bought me. I wanted to write that somewhere else. And then be able to set it aside, or even burn it if I wanted.

The rest of my entries in this journal, detailing my time with Ashford and Maisie, were too precious.

Maisie wandered out in her jammies with Stella on her heels. Ashford was still in the bathroom draining the tub.

“Emma, you and Daddy are sleeping on the mattress with me again, right?”

“Yep. We sure are.”

I’d been worried that I might wake Maisie if I had a nightmare. And Ihadwoken each night so far, sweating and breathing hard. But having Maisie and Ashford there had soothed me. Each time, Ashford woke with me and put his hand over my racing heart. Breathed with me until the panic had passed.

She crawled into the middle, the air mattress bouncing beneath her. “I like having sleepovers. Can we do this always?”

“Nope, eventually you’ll have to go back to your own room at your apartment. The reporters will all be gone, and everything will go back to normal.”

Her face scrunched up. “But will you still be there? Or will you have to go back to California and the beach, like you said before?”

I was pretty sure I knew the answer. Though I couldn’t tell her yet. Ashford and I hadn’t had the chance to discuss it.

But I did know what I wanted. And I took it on faith that he wanted the same. After what we’d been through, we both knew we couldn’t stand to be apart. Right?

“I’m still figuring that out,” I said. “But no matter where I am, I’ll be thinking of you. Because you’re one of my favorite people.”

“You’re one of my favoritest people.”

I laughed and kissed Maisie on the forehead.

THIRTY-SIX

Ashford

While Maisie was brushingher teeth, I got a text. The moment I saw who it was from, I snuck down the hall for some privacy to read it.

Ayla

About that favor you asked for. I have good news. Not final yet, and it’s a different opportunity from the one you wanted. But it could be life-changing for Emma’s career. Let me know when you want me to tell her.

I squeezed my phone in my fist, knowing what I wanted to say.Sorry Ayla, I was wrong. I changed my mind. Pretend I never asked.

I was such a selfish bastard.

Me

Thanks. Let’s wait until it’s final. I don’t want to get her hopes up unless this is for real.

My text was a cop-out. A way of avoiding the inevitable. But I just couldn’t upset the peace we’d found here in the past couple of days.

Ayla had never met Elias herself, but she’d been shocked to hear about what happened. The truth about Lori’s death had reopened her grief. And she was essentially dealing with it all by herself, which I hated. I’d offered to arrange for her to come to Judson’s, but she’d declined, saying that she didn’t want to risk the media finding her again.

She was comfortable at Last Refuge. In fact, she’d been raving about the food and the beautiful surroundings. That, along with several FaceTime sessions with Maisie, and it did sound like Ayla was getting the escape she needed.

And now, she was coming through on that favor I’d asked for. I was going to owe her for this one. Even though it would take Emma away from me.

You’re a good guy, Ashford, Ayla had said a few days ago.

Yeah, I was. It kinda sucked.

“There you are.” Emma walked down the hall. “Maisie’s ready for bed.”

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