Page 37 of Redemption

His words hit me right in the chest. We’ve never been the type of brothers to have a heart-to-heart about our feelings. We both lost our mothers—in different, horrific ways. Both of us understand the unrelenting ache of loss, even if he let himself feel it more than I ever could.

“How do you reconcile having her in danger all the time?” I’d never choose a life of danger for Carys, but it’s been finding us and hunting us.

He stares up at the ceiling before meeting my gaze. “I fell in love with a woman who inserted herself into our lives. She seeks the thrill.” He splays a hand on the counter. “Bit like you, really. She walked into the warehouse trap set by you, hell-bent on saving me rather than keeping herself safe. I love her bravery.” He takes a drink of his beer. “Even as it almost kills me every day.”

I ponder his words and the notion of bravery in the face of danger. I would’ve stepped into the warehouse. Not sure I’d label it bravery. Nothing to lose versus everything to lose. “Carys told me she was no safer in Cape Verde than she is here.”

“And you believe that?” Skepticism coats every word.

I grimace. “There was that bombing at her hotel.”

“Heard about that.”

“You know anything?”

“No. Not us, far as I understand. Though they were definitely keen to get you locked in.”

I doubt the FBI played dirty to secure my cooperation, but it does mean there’s someone else out there with an axe to grind. With me? With her? The unknown is the hardest to overcome. I fiddle with my bottle. “If she’s here, at least I might see the danger coming. If she’s there—I’ve got no chance.”

The apartment door pops open, and Kim enters the kitchen with two bags of groceries and more beer. Lorcan takes the bottles, loading them into the fridge, while she ignores me to unpack the food.

“Maybe you caving to let her stay isn’t as selfish as I thought it was,” she says, without looking at me.

I almost spit out my drink. “You were eavesdropping?”

She shoots me a sly grin. “Occupational hazard.” She nods in Lorcan’s direction as she shoves a box of crackers into a cupboard. “He would have told me anyway.” She slots the last thing into the fridge and leans against Lorcan. His hand rests on her hip.

“Bad fucking habit.” I slide my beer onto the counter. The kitchen is too closed in for us. Actually, this apartment is going to drive me insane. It’s only slightly bigger than my prison cell.

“Except if you’re a spy trying to stay alive.” Her lips twist in annoyance. “You’re one to talk. Given the chance, you’d do the same thing.”

Is that what bothers me about her? We’re too much alike? Or maybe it’s that she doesn’t hide her dislike for me? There’s no veneer of civility between us. We rub each other in the wrong ways.

“Can you ask Carys to record her conversation with Evander when she fires him?” Kim takes a pack of gum out of her pocket and pops a piece into her mouth.

I eye her warily. It’s a good idea, and one I hadn’t considered. “I can.” Evander is connected to so many people and organizations, he might let something slip in their discussion.

“I’d text her.” She keeps focused on putting things away. “But we’re not friends again yet.”

“You think she can forget your betrayal?” I smirk.

She meets my gaze, defiance in her black depths. “She took you back, so I figure anything is possible.”

Lorcan tugs her against him and murmurs something in her ear. The tension dissipates, and she turns to bury her face in his neck.

“Tomorrow.” He looks at me. “Pierre-Jacques has a history of keeping his key people on site. It’s likely he’ll ask you, and perhaps Carys, to remain on the property.”

My forehead puckers at the notion. “Then she’d be in constant danger. She can’t stay, even if I do.”

He gives Kim’s ass a gentle swat as she heads out of the kitchen. “If you don’t let her stay with you, you might as well send her packing to Cape Verde. If she’s not tied to you, I reckon the PLA’ll consider her fair game.”

At every junction, her safety is compromised. I rub my face. “I don’t know the right move here.”

“Trust your gut.” Lorcan polishes off his second beer and sets it in the sink. “Your head’ll overthink, and your heart’ll be too cautious.”

My gut tells me to keep Carys close. While my presence might be a danger, I’m also sometimes the thing standing between her and something much more terrible.

We’re in the tin can car Lorcan and Kim use, and Carys, Jay, and I are crammed into the back. If this was one of those older girly sitcoms Carys used to make me watch, there’d be a laugh track attached. My shoulders feel like they’re wedged into a vise.

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