Page 25 of Rooster

"I'm trying not to lose my shit on a bottle of orange juice," I mutter, repeating my breathing steps twice more before opening my eyes to face her.

Her brows are drawn together as she watches me.

"Is it spoiled? They go through food so fast here, I can't imagine something got tucked in the back of the fridge and forgotten."

"I almost dropped it," I mutter. "Twice."

"Too much to drink last night?"

"I wish," I say, taking a tighter than normally necessary grip on the neck of the juice bottle before tilting it over my glass and pouring.

"I saw you and Rooster getting to know each other."

I lower the bottle to the counter before glaring at her. Knowing my luck this morning, I'd knock the whole thing to the floor if I'm not careful.

"I hardly know the man," I assure her.

I think that has a lot to do with my frustrations and issues this morning.

The guy has got to be clueless. Either that, or he seriously isn't interested in me at all. After all that has happened, I don't know if my ego can handle a hit like that.

I know with every part of my brain that handles reasoning that I shouldn't even look at Robert that way, especially not after what happened with his brother. That's a taboo line I never saw myself crossing, but there's a reason I was attracted to Henry. The guy is stunningly gorgeous, and seeing as Robert is his identical twin, it just makes sense I'd also be attracted to him.

Last night was fun, but I can't recall an evening in recent history when I spent time with a man who didn't at least flirt with me. I'm not a very firm believer in men and women having a platonic-only relationship. Someone always looks twice. There's always some wonder about what if and maybe, especially with how casual sex has become.

Robert watched me. He was quick to smile and laugh and joke. He didn't throw a fit or get an attitude when his declaration of being horrible at darts came true.

I didn't see a single red flag. Although part of my mind was trying to convince me that that in itself is a red flag, I never once imagined that he wasn't being genuine.

But he didn't lean in close or try to brush my hand. He didn't step up behind me to give me pointers when my dart stuck in the wall instead of the board.

It was friendly, even chaste, and I went to bed internalizing what was wrong with me, that he didn't act like other men.

And that's a whole other bag of worms I didn't want to consider. I know my worth isn't wrapped up in how a man feels about me, but it left me tossing and turning all night and annoyed that he was so kind.

I'm not really a hand-necklace kind of girl, but his restraint and courtesy made me imagine that he snapped shortly after he walked me to my room last night. I pictured him coming back, banging on my door, and reaching out and gripping my throat as he unleashed a fury of commands on my body.

"What's that face for?" Kaylee asks as she turns away to make a pot of coffee.

"Just annoyed," I mutter, wanting to keep my feelings of failure to myself but also wanting someone to talk to about it as well. "Why are men so fucking clueless?"

Motion across the room draws my attention, and I see Ellis standing several feet away. He glances from Kaylee to me and then back to Kaylee.

"This is girl shit," he says, hands by his ears as if my last sentence is holding him at gunpoint.

Kaylee chuckles when he spins around and walks away.

"Coward," I mutter but feel relieved that I'm not going to have this conversation with someone else present.

Kaylee is tapping her fingers on the counter, waiting for the coffee carafe to have enough coffee in it to pour herself a cup.

"I don't think he's interested in me at all," I confess, feeling more than a little vulnerable.

Kaylee turns to face me.

"I don't think that's true," she says. "He watched you all damn night. Ellis and I had bets on how long he was going to take before he approached you."

Confusion makes me scowl.

---