Page 99 of Hungry Hearts

I pull out a stool at the counter and take a seat. “I was in third grade the first time I remember them screaming at each other. My mom was a secretary and was having an affair with her boss. She promised it was over. My dad made her quit, and she got a job at another company.”

Maia doesn’t say anything and moves to the other side of the counter, pushing the bags of groceries to the side.

“They fought a lot. Dad didn’t trust her and accused her of cheating on him with fancy ‘suit-wearing’ guys from her work. The fights and tears went on for a few years, and then one day my mom started working at McDonald’s with my dad. He managed the restaurant, and he made her an assistant manager. The fighting stopped at the house, but they never smiled again. Never laughed. We didn’t go on any more family camping trips. No day trips. Nothing. My parents were there for me, but they were nevertherefor me.”

Maia moves over to me and steps between my open legs. She touches my face with the softness and gentleness of a mother. Motherly affection I haven’t received since I was too young to remember.

“My dad wouldn’t let her go, even when she wanted to leave. He fought for her to stay with us, and she did. Maybe because of me? Maybe because she was too scared to leave? I don’t know. My parents didn’t have—don’thave an abusive relationship. From what I remember, other than the fighting about the affair and trust, they get along fine. It was always my dad trying harder than my mom though. Still true today.”

I swallow back the lump in my throat and lift my eyes to her for the first time. I don’t see judgment or pity. I see comfort. I close my eyes and tilt my head into the palm of her hand. She rubs along my shoulder and neck with her other hand and I want to melt into her. It’s not sexual. It’s...tender.

“I promised myself I’d never be like my father. A victim and blinded by love or whatever he feels for my mother. Yeah, my parents are together, but there’s no trust. He always has a look of doubt when she says she’s going out with friends, or if she’s running errands. It’s a fucked up way to live and a fucked up marriage. I told myself I’d never fall in love and be a victim of the heart. Trust is something that, once broken, can’t be repaired. When I saw you, not you, but when I thought you broke our trust, I didn’t listen to your messages. I couldn’t hear your voice or see you in person because I knew all it would take was those whiskey eyes pleading for a second chance, and I’d cave. I’d believe you when you’d promise you wouldn’t do it again, but I’d always have this lingering doubt. I’d become my father. A hollow man. So I didn’t fight for you because I was scared I’d take you back. If it was me you even wanted.”

“Ryder.” A teardrop, hers, I think, lands on my gray sweatpants. “I’m so sorry you witnessed that. That you grew up in a home without trust. And I’m sorry I’ve made you feel the same way.” She presses a kiss on my forehead.

“I’m sorry I pushed you away without talking about what happened. Fuck. If I had, these past few weeks without you and Ruby never would have happened. I’ve missed you both so fucking much.”

She chokes out a sob and presses her body into mine. We stay like that, holding each other, her crying, me pushing back my tears, for minutes. Hours. Days. However long is not long enough. I never want to let her go. Ever. I’m so in love with this woman.

“I’ve missed you, too.” She wipes her eyes on my shirt. “I’ve been a walking zombie. Do you know my sister stayed with Ruby one night so I could camp outside your apartment door?”

“Stalking me?” I tip my head back so I can stare at her whiskey eyes. “That’s hot.”

“So hot you had to hide out in this penthouse.”

“Did you know this is a no-girls-allowed penthouse?”

She curls that plump, delicious lower lip between her teeth. “Avery told me this was Nolan’s idea.”

I grin at her and pull her onto my lap so she’s straddling me. “He’s seen me through every phase of my life. He’s the only one who knows the extent of the damage my parents have done to my psyche. But since he tells his wife every damn thing, I’m guessing Avery knows too. He wouldn’t have given you the key if he didn’t know how I felt about you.”

“I canfeelhow you feel about me.” She smirks and grinds her pussy on my hard dick.

Hell, I didn’t even realize I was hard. She does this to me, but it’s so much more than sex with her, and I need her to know that.

“We never invited women up here because this was our sacred place away from the crazy, privileged life this casino provided us. The only women who have been up here are the ones we love.” Even if the guys didn’t know it at the time. Me? I already knew.

“You...love?”

“Damn fucking straight. This is a first for me, so I’m probably going to screw it up from time to time. I’m not asking you to say it back. I get that you had your one true love, and I know I can’t take that from you. I just want the opportunity to love you and Ruby.”

“Say it back?” She blinks back her tears and that sassy smile I love so fucking much comes out. “I don’t recall you saying it at all.”

I squeeze her hips, trying to keep my cock at bay, and drift my hands up her torso until my fingers latch on to the hair at her scalp. I inch my face closer to hers. Our lips are a whisper apart. “I love you, Maia. I love you so fucking much. And when I’m not with you, when I thought I lost you, it hurt like the death of a thousand high-carbon-steel Japanese kitchen knives stabbing my soul.”

She quirks her lip. “I don’t know what that means, but it sounds painful and dangerous. I don’t want you to ever feel that way again.”

I cover her mouth with mine and kiss her deeply until we’re both out of breath. She tastes like the sun and the rain, comfort and happiness.

“Ryder.” She cups my face again. “I love you too.”

She wraps her legs around me as I carry us to my room and sit down on my bed. I keep our mouths joined, tasting everything she has to offer as I skim my hands under her sweatshirt to feel her skin. “I’ve missed you so much, Maia.”

She breaks our kiss only to lift my shirt off, and I drop it on the floor. I want to take my time with her, touching, licking, tasting every inch of her body, but her hands are frantic on me. She cups me and I groan.

“Angel. Slow down. I want this to last and you’re going to set me off in thirty seconds.”

“We’ll just have to do it twice then.” She uses her foot to push down my sweats, freeing me. When her hand wraps around my dick, I’m done.

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