Page 31 of Always Another Sunset

“Wise choice,” Joanie said, then Bella heard her hesitate for a beat. “But I know this is hard for you.”

Closing her eyes for a moment, Bella tried to keep her emotions in check. “You have no idea,” Bella replied. “I feel like a part of my heart is breaking.”

“But the separation doesn’t have to be forever,” her editor said. “Unless that’s what you’ve decided on.”

“No, definitely not that. We both want to find a way to work this out.”

“Good,” Joanie said. “Because you’ve never sounded happier. Still, I’m guessing she’ll want to stay on Oahu because of her business.”

Bella shook her head. “I would never let her make any other decision than to stay here and do what she loves,” she said. “It really comes down to what do I want to do.”

“And?” Joanie asked. “What do you want to do?”

“Try to have a long-distance relationship I guess,” Bella answered. “There’s no easy solution to this, and JC promises she will come to visit me in a couple of months.” The idea of not seeing JC or Roxie for a couple of months made Bella’s stomach hurt. As she looked around the quaint house with the beautiful yard, glimmering swimming pool, and wonderful patio, she thought she was crazy for even considering leaving. But then again, she thought of home and felt divided.

“Hey,” Joanie said gently. “There’s nothing wrong with slowing down your relationship and spending time apart.”

A tear slipped down Bella’s cheek. “You’re right,” she said. “But I love her and don’t want to lose her.”

“I know,” her editor said. “I know.”

Holding Bella’s hands,JC kissed the woman tenderly on the lips and savored the moment. They were outside the terminal at Inouye International Airport in Honolulu. In a few moments the person she realized she cared most for in the world was going to walk through the doors into the terminal and fly away. Although JC had dealt with tough things in her life, somehow that moment seemed like the hardest. Letting Bella go with only a promise they would talk to each other every day was a challenge.But not a test,she thought.I trust in our relationship. Bella wants to keep us together as much as I do.“Fly safe,” JC said as she pulled back and looked into the woman’s eyes. “And text me the minute you land.”

Bella squeezed JC’s hands. “You know I will,” she said, and there were tears in her eyes that made it even harder for JC to say goodbye. She leaned in and kissed her once more before letting go of her hands.

Tears stung her eyes too. “Don’t miss your flight,” she said, and Bella nodded, taking hold of her suitcases.

She started to walk away. “I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you more,” JC said with a smile. Bella laughed, but there was a melancholy tone to the sound, and then she disappeared through the sliding doors into the airport.

Letting her chin fall to her chest, JC let out a long sad breath.I hope I’m not making the biggest mistake in my life, she thought.Maybe I should have gone with her. At least to the conference so that we could still be together. But it wasn’t that easy, and she knew it. She had responsibilities in Hawaii and not only Roxie but her Oahu Paddle Adventures business. Even if she wanted to, JC couldn’t exactly cancel all her tours and close the doors at a moment’s notice.No, I would never do that.

Instead, she would carry on and start taking Roxie with her to the office every day. She would be fine with someone to take her out a few times while JC was giving tours. With a two-hour break between the morning and afternoon excursions, she could give Roxie lots of attention. She also had high hopes of teaching her to ride on a kayak with her. With Roxie’s love of the water and no fear of the ocean, there was a strong possibility the dog could adapt to it. Watching videos on YouTube of other dogs surfing and kayaking, she knew it was certainly possible.And Roxie is a really smart dog, she thought as she walked toward the parking garage. In life anything was possible, and that went beyond what the amazing dog they found could do. She also believed she and Bella would find a way to work things out.

Even though there would have to be sacrifices made by one or both of them, she would be patient. Just then her phone chimed, and she pulled it from her pocket. There was a text message from Bella. “At the gate,” she said. “Missing you like crazy already.” JC prepared to reply when a new text made her pause. “Am I making the right decision?”

JC stared at the screen for a moment, unsure exactly what to say. Her mind believed Bella was making the right decision and that she had to live her own life. But in her heart, she was afraid.Was this only a fling in a tropical paradise?she wondered.Could she possibly love me as much as I love her?Finally, she typed back. “Everything will be all right,” she wrote, then considered what to add, wondering why she hadn’t said it to her before she walked away into the terminal. Hoping her indecision hadn’t made her too late, she typed an additional note. “Because I love you.”

A message came right back. “I love you more.”

31

“Well, look at you all tan,” Bella’s older sister said with a smile as she walked toward her in the baggage claim area at the Portland International airport. “And I like the highlights in your hair. Did you do that on purpose?”

“Hanna,” Bella said, beaming back. “I missed you.” They pulled each other into a hug, and Bella held on tight for a minute before letting go to watch for her luggage. “And no, it was simply being outside in the Hawaii sunshine.”

“Well, it looks fabulous,” Hanna said, looking her up and down. “You look great.”

“Thank you,” Bella answered. She had missed her sister, perhaps more than anyone else at home. Being close in age, they were often mistaken for twins, although Bella playfully reminded people that she was the much younger sister. Hanna was one of the reasons Bella was so conflicted about her future. Even though they emailed back and forth regularly throughout all of Bella’s travels, there was always something special when they were in the same place. A fact that was interesting because their lives could not be more different.

While Bella tried to make sense of her life, Hanna had a family with a wonderful husband and children—two rambunctious boys. Bella’s sister’s life was all about baseball games, family picnics, and supporting her husband’s career as a police officer. Bella often thought Hanna was a perfect role model for future moms.

“And honestly, I think Hawaii really agreed with me,” Bella said with a laugh. “And it’s pretty much impossible to spend time there and not get a tan.”

Hanna lifted an eyebrow. “Sitting around your friend’s pool probably helped with that,” she said, making Bella’s smile widen. She had yet to give all the details about JC to her sister, but Hanna clearly guessed enough to be more than a little curious about the new woman in Bella’s life. “I expect a full story of what you were up to when you were supposedly on Oahu to find your muse.”

Bella laughed. “I think I did find her, actually,” she said as she spied her luggage coming around on the carousel.But how much do I want to share about my relationship with JC?Bella wondered.Things are so up in the air.Although she and Hanna were close, they didn’t necessarily talk about the details of their intimate lives. Bella had no ideas about Hanna’s life outside of what she could see regarding her sister’s marriage and family. Everything looked perfect, but it was impossible to know for sure.

---