Page 32 of Always Another Sunset

It wasn’t so much Bella wanted to keep the specifics of her relationship with JC a secret. Her sister knew Bella met an old college friend while going on a kayaking adventure, but not the fact it was wanting to explore more with JC that made her extend her trip. Unfortunately, she let it slip that she moved into the friend’s fantastic house but explained the separate bedroom arrangement. At the time, she thought Hanna bought her clarification, but after the pool comment, she wasn’t so sure. Bella had avoided revealing to Hanna that they had taken it further and were much more than friends.Or even that I am sure I am in love with JC and considering moving to be with her,she thought. Although Hanna was always supportive, even she might question such a big decision so soon.

They each grabbed a large roller bag and headed for the exit. As she followed Hanna out the revolving door, Bella felt her phone vibrate in her back pocket. Grabbing it with her free hand, she smiled when she saw a new message from JC. They had sent a few back and forth as soon as she landed, but this message seemed to include a picture. While they waited to cross the lanes of traffic, Bella opened it to see JC and Roxie on the beach beside a kayak. “We’re going to give this a try,” the text said. “I’ll keep you posted. P.S. We both miss you like crazy.”

“I miss you too and send more pics,” was all Bella managed to type before they were on their way again. Thinking of the image of JC and Roxie about to try something fun made Bella long to be with them even more. Being away was already hard and only made her more unsure about what to do with her life.

Finally hearingBella had arrived safely, JC relaxed. When the first text came in after the plane landed and everything was fine, she decided it was time to head for the beach with Roxie. Since it was early enough in the afternoon it felt like a good time to teach her how to ride on a kayak and hopefully distract herself from missing Bella.And maybe distract Roxie too,she thought. The dog had stayed right beside her since she got back from the airport as if aware JC was sad from missing the absent Bella.I wonder what she thinks.She’s an intelligent animal and watched Bella pack, so maybe she gets what’s happened.The activity would do them both good.

Going to a quiet beach where few people visited because the waves were almost nonexistent, JC had packed one of her largest kayaks to try her experiment. Once they were on the sand, JC knelt in front of the dog. “Okay, Roxie,” she said to the attentive black and white animal in a bright yellow lifejacket. “There’s nothing to be afraid of, and I promise I’ll keep you safe.”

Never losing eye contact, Roxie simply panted under the warm sun, clearly ready to do whatever JC asked. After settling the kayak firmly into the sand and attaching a lead to the back of Roxie’s jacket, JC coaxed Roxie forward. Pausing, she set up a quick picture of her and Roxie to send to Bella.Just a little reminder of what we look like,she thought, sending the text. Her plan was to send lots of photos and keep Bella thinking about them.

After stowing her phone in the dry bag, JC took out treats for Roxie’s training. She immediately had the dog’s rapt attention. With the treats and JC’s encouraging words, Roxie came closer, taking a moment to smell along the side of the two-seater ocean kayak, and then without much more prompting, jumped on. She scrambled a little on the slippery surface but caught herself and sat while never taking her eyes off JC’s hand holding the treat. With a laugh at the dog’s antics as well as impressed, JC gave her the reward. “Well, that took less time than I thought it would,” JC said. “Let’s practice you getting in the kayak a few more times and then see what happens when I get you closer to the water.”

She needn’t have worried. Roxie was a natural, and after getting the hang of sitting on the kayak on land, JC started to move the kayak closer to the waves. As they continued to practice, Roxie became a little more excited, trying to bound around in the water. JC could always coax her focus back with a treat. Roxie even seemed to be starting to recognize her name, which was essential to JC. The last thing she wanted was for the dog to become lost again.

Finally, they were ready to push off, and with Roxie in the front seat staring into the horizon as if she had done so a million times, JC gave the kayak a push into the gentle waves. Settling into her spot, trying not to rock the kayak, JC started to paddle them a little distance away from the shore. Clearly realizing they were moving, Roxie looked over her shoulder at JC, and she would swear the dog had another smile on her face. They spent the next hour paddling up the coastline and back. Not once did Roxie try to jump out, even when they saw a flock of seabirds running across the sand. Beyond impressed, JC drove them home, eager to try again on rougher water soon. Plus, she couldn’t wait to tell Bella all about it when the woman had time to talk later that night. They made a pact that Bella would at least always call before she went to bed, if not more often. It was one way they hoped to stay connected, and already JC could hardly wait. Although it wasn’t an ideal situation, for the moment, JC knew it would have to do.

32

Waking to a bird singing in the tree outside her open window, Bella smiled as she stretched her arms over her head. It was one of her favorite sounds, yet she was confused for a second when she opened her eyes. Seeing that she was not in her Hawaii bedroom, and not in JC’s either, the situation took a moment to register. She was in Oregon, and what she heard were the sounds of her home. Laying on her back, Bella stared at the ceiling and contemplated life. It was the first morning without JC and drinking their coffee together, and the thought made her heart hurt a little. The woman knew exactly how Bella liked it and would bring her a mug on the patio to enjoy. The two women and Roxie in her spot on the tiles between them, enjoying the start of another magical day.

Still, she knew her long unused Keurig waited downstairs. Plus, she was smart enough to ask her sister, who had been willing to grab her a few essentials, to buy some French Vanilla creamer. Slipping out from under the covers, Bella pulled on her robe to go downstairs to the kitchen. Unlike JC’s one-story house on the canals, Bella lived in the suburbs of Portland in a two-story turn-of-the-century bungalow. Although the view wasn’t quite the same, and there wasn’t a pool in the backyard, the property was beautiful and in a much coveted location. Buying it ten years before on her father’s advice, Bella could get three times what she paid for it if she listed the house. Something that came to mind often as she decided what to do with her future.

After reaching the coffee machine and starting a cup, Bella wandered the rooms of her home. The dining room with a round table she took six months to find, the perfect antique rug to fill her living room, and all the other personal touches.How can I leave this?she thought.I put my heart into it, and this house is a part of me.

When she heard her coffee was ready, Bella perfectly doctored it with creamer and wandered into her backyard. The broad, multi-tier porch was a special place where she came up with so many ideas for her stories. Sitting in a wicker chair with a bright yellow and green cushion, Bella relaxed and looked over her yard. The oak tree in the corner was full of leaves, and they would turn a beautiful orange before falling. Of course, she would have to rake them in the fall, but it was a chore she actually enjoyed. The rhododendrons were still in bloom but starting to drop their petals, and her other shrubs gave the yard a nice green space.I need to get a gardener in here to trim everything and get me back on track, she thought.And buy some annuals to plant and liven things up. Although nothing will compare to JC’s backyard. That is a slice of paradise.The comparison wasn’t fair though. Oregon, although beautiful in its own right, was not the tropical paradise of Hawaii.

Sipping her coffee, Bella looked over her lawn and tried to find some answer there.Can I leave all of this behind because I think I’m in love with someone?she wondered. The idea of packing, moving, and selling made her stomach hurt.And what if a few months from now we don’t fit so well?That seemed impossible because, over the last few weeks, she had never felt more connected to someone. Just like in college, JC simply “got her,” and Bella felt she did the same. They were inseparable back then, and she craved JC’s company when they were apart.How in the world did I go years without acting on how I felt?She sipped again.I wanted her the entire time but was too scared of ruining our friendship to tell her. So much wasted time.She paused.Am I doing the same thing by being here now and not with her?With a sigh, Bella simply did not have a clear answer.

At the edgeof the beautiful turquoise-blue lagoon, JC watched the twelve people in the tour group frolic in the warm water. The break to swim was good as the early July afternoon was warm. Plus, they were all excellent at kayaking, good swimmers and overall confident in the water, so she wasn’t worried. She could easily monitor things from shore.

“Not getting in, JC?” Blake said, coming up beside her.

JC shook her head. “Not today,” she said, unsure why she hesitated. It wasn’t like she hadn’t been to the lagoon without Bella before over the last few weeks. She went pretty much twice a day. But this time felt different. If she was being honest, she missed Bella like crazy, and the thought of doing anything that might make her memory stronger was torture. “I’m fine on the sand. You go have fun.”

Nodding, Blake didn’t move toward the water and instead studied JC’s face. “You okay?” he asked quietly.

JC hesitated to answer. Usually, she kept all her feelings to herself and didn’t like to share but considered opening up to Blake. He was a good guy and much more than simply an employee. He worked hard to make Oahu Paddle Adventures a success. Not only was he great with the tourists, but he never turned down an extra tour, was at work early without being asked, and stayed late to rinse kayaks without a complaint. Most important, she looked at him and his girlfriend as her close friends, even though they hardly saw each other outside of work once Bella came into JC’s life. She frowned.So why haven’t I sold him a share of the business?she wondered.He’s certainly earned it, but he’s never asked. Maybe it’s time I found out if he would want to be a co-owner and give up some control.She smiled.And then I could spend more time with Bella in Oregon.

“Really, I’m okay. I promise,” JC finally said, turning her thoughts back to the present moment. “I won’t lie. I’m missing Bella pretty badly.”

“Yeah,” Blake said, looking over the water. “I can imagine. You are really into her.”

Unable to help it, JC laughed. “Into her, am I?’ she said. “Is it that obvious?”

Blake shrugged but grinned too. “I’m not trying to imply anything because you’re always on top of things, but…

“But what?”

“Well,” the young man said, nudging his toe into the sand. “You’ve been a little distracted since that tour with Bella on it.”

Not sure if what the man said was good or bad, JC put a hand on his tanned shoulder. “I hope it hasn’t put an extra burden on you,” she said. “And I promise going forward, I’ll focus on everything more.”

Blake patted her hand. “Naw,” he said. “Nothing like that. You’re always a pro in the office and on the tours, only nowadays you’re ready to blow out of the office at the end of the day.” He laughed. “Before she came along, we would go out for a drink sometimes, and I honestly thought you worked so hard that you slept there.”

He wasn’t far off. In order to build the business, JC put every waking hour into it. Countless nights she stayed late to work on things. There was more to success than simply putting out a shingle and hoping people noticed. Ads had to be placed on Google, Facebook pages to update and Instagram posts to interact on, not to mention conventional ads everywhere.Including the one in the brochure that led Bella back to me,she thought, feeling her heart clench.How am I going to stand being without her?

As if sensing her conflict, Blake made a motion toward the water. “Let’s get in,” he said. “It’s a hot day, and the water is always refreshing. And maybe it will take your mind off things.”

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