Page 24 of Under One Roof

Like a bully, I figure the best way to deal with them is to ignore it. Show them they can’t get to me. I’m not going to quit or leave just because of some literal elementary school stuff. It would take a lot more than that to make me sweat. I throw on my pajamas and tuck into bed, falling asleep, not to thoughts of Griffin but of his rascal kids.

The next morning, when my alarm goes off on my cell phone, I roll over to shut it off then curl back up under the comforter until Cat paws at me. The last few days, he’s found his way downstairs so that he’s next to me when I wake up.

I pet his head. “The kids will get you breakfast. That’s on their chore list.”

He obviously doesn’t understand and steps on top of my chest, kneading me.

“Fine. All right. I’ll get up,” I tell him and lift him off me so I can sit up. Still half asleep, I stretch my arms over my head and yawn, rolling out my joints before standing. I shuffle toward the bathroom, but I recognize a second too late that I’ve walked into some kind of wire.

Which sets off a nightmare.

A blast of cold water dumps over my head, and in the midst of my confusion and astonishment, there’s a loud pop of a balloon. I shriek as a cloud of glitter explodes all around me. Completely disoriented and dripping wet, I blindly take a step forward but trip over something furry.

Cat darts between my feet, setting off another spray of water from a contraption rigged to the floor. This time, I manage to shield my face, but my pajamas are soaked. Catching my breath, I turn in a tight circle, taking in the war zone around me, studying the mess of string, glitter, and water guns rigged up in my room. This is no kid’s prank. This is someHome Alone-level type shit.

Parent Traptimes a million.

Logan and Grace aren’t just mischievous kids—they’re evil masterminds.

And it takes me a full ten minutes to accept who I’ve been hired to take care of. Another twenty to clean everything up, refusing to let their antics get to me. No way am I giving them the satisfaction of seeing me crack. Once I’ve dismantled their elaborate traps, I take a shower, but I think I’ll be finding glitter in my ears for days to come.

I dress, pretend the glitter that wouldn’t come out of my hair was put there on purpose, and add a bit of extra makeup this morning, aiming for a Kesha circa 2010 effect.

Upstairs, I make sure the kids are awake and getting ready for school. They greet me with innocent smiles I don’t buy for a second.

“Morning, Miss Andrea!” Logan chirps. “You look nice today.”

I force a smile. “Thank you, Logan. And how are you two this morning?”

“Great,” Grace says sweetly. Too sweetly.

I won’t let them see I’m rattled, even though my mind is racing, trying to figure out how to get back at them. If it’s war they want, then it’s war they’ll get.

We make it through breakfast, and they get on the bus without incident, but as soon as I’m back, I start scouring the house for supplies. No way am I letting them best me. Time to fight fire with fire. Or in this case, glitter with glitter.

I used to handle the biggest diva in the music industry; I can handle a couple of kids. Even if they are supervillains.

Chapter9

Griffin

Ipush open the door to Cuppa Jo to see Taryn and Ian are already tucked into our usual booth, coffees steaming in front of them. I slide in next to my brother, who hands me my coffee order with a “Hey, Cap.”

“Thanks.”

Taryn blows over the top of hers. “How was work?”

“Same old.”

Ian slaps my back. “It’s all saving cats from trees and little old ladies from breaking hips, huh?”

“We can’t all be like you, barely working.”

Ian stretches out his legs beneath the table. “What can I say? I’m good at my job.”

It’s true. Ian’s tattoo shop is popular. He has waiting lists months long and can make his own schedule.

“What about you?” I ask my sister. “How are you?”

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