Page 82 of The Upgrade

Reject.

The app flashes a question:Are you sure?

I’m not sure. Not one tiny bit.

But I draw a deep breath and clickyesanyway.

* * *

It’s nearingsundown when I go for a walk on the beach. I don’t have a destination in mind. I just need to clear my head, though it’s not really helping. I’ve been walking for almost three hours.

Sunset casts ribbons of bright pink and red on the water as two crimson macaws soar overhead, their blue and gold wings catching faint wisps of light. Waves lick the shore by my feet as a ripple of laughter floats down from the resort.

I glance at the restaurant above, spotting the table where Eve and I ate that first night. There’s a woman there with three muscle-bound consorts, and I’m weirdly relieved it’s not Eve.

Then a bright peal of laughter rings out and I turn toward the edge of the bar. There, in a strapless red dress with her hair floating loose on her shoulders, sits Eve. She’s with Logan, the guy from her boat cruise. The consort I think is a super-nice guy, so why am I balling my hands into fists?

I could have been with her tonight. It might’ve been me making her laugh like that.

It’s my own fault I’m not.

Fuck it.

It’s better this way. Eve deserves to be happy, and I…

Well. I’m not the guy to give her that. I’m not what Eve needs.

I now know for sure what I only suspected when Miranda left. I’m not the kind of guy who’s wired to please someone long term. I’m the guy who drags partners down.

Eve’s carefree laugh, her entire experience at Crystal Bliss—that’s what her life has been missing. She wouldn’t get those things tied down to me. Stuck with a guy who takes life too seriously.

Pivoting toward the sea, I turn my back on Eve and Logan. I move down the beach, hands still clenched at my sides. I’ve already marched this pale path of sand five or six times this evening. My heart drums my ears as prickly bits of driftwood stab the soles of my feet.

“You okay?” a female voice calls out.

I jerk to a stop and see Sybil on her deck overlooking the ocean. Kora’s beside her and waves her own greeting.

“I’m good.” I drag a hand through my hair and try to look like a guy not coming apart at the seams. “Just taking a walk.”

Sybil holds up a bottle of wine. “Join us. I’ll grab another glass.”

“No, thanks.” I need to be alone right now.

“Ashton Holyfield was looking for you earlier,” Kora calls. “Something about a guest review that mentioned a therapy session. A bubble bath or—Topher?” She must see something in my face. “He wasn’t accusing you of anything.”

Sybil chuckles beside her. “What, like turning a sexy bubble bath into a weepy psychotherapy session? Pretty sure he didn’t dothat.”

She says it like a joke, but that’s exactly what happened. I took something fun and made it a miserable experience.

Just like I’d do to Eve’s life. I’d suck all the joy out of her, just like her ex did. Just like I did to Miranda.

“Topher?” Sybil tilts her head. “You’re sure you’re okay?”

“Yep.”

The women exchange a quick glance. When they look back at me, I feel itchy and judged.

Kora speaks first. “I noticed you turned down a dinner request.”