Page 11 of Atonement

5

Monday

Daybreak

The truth about a lie is,it’s never, really, truly a lie, is it?

Most everyone’s deceit holds a small amount of honesty. A little bit of yourself that could be true, if you let it.

So, what part of my deception is fabricated?

How far did I go to invent a cover-up for my dishonesty? A fact that may hold more truth than anything else I have said so far.

Are you listening closely?

The biggest betrayal is the one we inflict on ourselves.

The lies that restrict us. Obligate us to keep up the act. To behave in any certain way that we constantly struggle not to. They’re a sick confinement, forcing us to carry out a death wish on our souls when all we really care about, all we really want, is to live free of the guilt from the one truth that’s swallowing us whole.

My name is Declan Ace McClintock.

That you know.

But how far will I go to protect my illusion?

I hope you’re comfortable, because we’re just getting started.

It’s a dangerous world we all live in, but my secret makes mine twice as deadly. It’s a fact I’ve kept hidden for the last several years, even from my wife. The one soul I used to believe I’d share everything with. But keeping this secret will only serve to protect her as I work to accomplish an end to my penance.

That being said, I’m more likely to die from the show Magnolia’s putting on in front of my intelligently placed camera right now, than from any asshole who’s holding a grudge and decided to burn me in the process.

“What’d you say your name was again, handsome?” she purrs as she pours the cocksucker behind her a drink. She then pulls the top of her dress down seductively low before glancing up directly into the camera above to make sure I’m watching.

“Timmy,” the skinny creep stutters as he answers back a little too jittery. “Uh, Ti...Ti...Timmy Walters.”

Her eyes stay locked on mine through the lens as my cock grows hard and I watch her pick up an ice cube, roll it across her collarbone, and then slowly lower it down to her ample cleavage. Her tits are on full display, making both mine and Timmy’s mouths water. I shake my head at her and adjust the hardening length in my slacks before sitting up straighter and increasing the volume on the monitor.

“Timmy,” her raspy, sexy, phone operator voice rings out through the feed snapping both Tim and me out of our sexual haze. She winks into the lens, a reminder of which one of us is really in control, before turning and giving me a delicious view of her plump ass as she proceeds to cock her head to the side and study our next victim. The kid we went to the club looking for five fucking days ago. “That’s short for Timothy, isn’t it?”

He nods, excited and overly eager as she starts to take a step towards him in the center of the room.

“I bet you made all the boys jealous,” she teases, as she reaches his chair and hands him his drink. He goes to take a sip, to stop his jitters, but she stops him by kicking his feet out to both sides and taking a step between his legs. “I bet you had all the girls wishing they were yours,” she seductively sings, slowly lowering herself and taking a seat on his lap. I crack my neck to each side and grind my teeth together in envious rage. She lifts his shaky hand, the one holding his drink, and raises it to his lips; allowing him the sip she denied him earlier just as she leans in and whispers something in his ear. My fists clench and my knuckles turn white as I wait with building fury to hear what she says next.

“I bet they all wish they could sit on your lap,” she suggests.

I stand abruptly and knock my chair over in the process just as her hand starts to travel up the inside of his thigh. I’m paralyzed with greed, standing stiff as a fucking bolder, selfish as shit, and needing her hands reserved only for my lap. My body. My fucking hard dick. Not his sorry excuse for anything resembling manhood.

“But you’re all grown up now, aren’t you Timothy?” she whispers, her hand reaching its prize and making little Timmy jolt back in surprise. I notice the pathetic, small bulge in his pants that wouldn’t please a virgin, let alone a woman as demanding as Magnolia, and grunt in disgust. “What did you say you do now, Timmy?” she breathes in his ear, and I roll my eyes as the tiny-dick Timmy’s hand starts shaking and spilling his drink everywhere.

“Software developer,” he sputters, “F..f..for Nasa.”

“Mm,” she purrs, pretending to be in awe as if she didn’t already know, right before she gives his sorry excuse for a cock another stroke. I roll my eyes and swear the kid cums right then and there in his pants as his eyes roll back in his head. “Bet you’re the smartest man I’ve ever had, the pleasure with, Timmy.”

Fuck this! I’ve had enough of her show for two reasons. One, all cock-teasing and pleasing belongs to me. Two, she’s selling herself too low for a woman who’s worth more than she’ll ever know, and I can’t watch another gut-wrenching second of it.

“Bet you could tell me things I’ve never thought up in my wildest dreams,” I hear her say as I push through my bedroom door and stalk out into the hallway.

Wildest dreams?

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