Page 146 of Cursed Lifeline

song: hysteria | Muse

Hangingin the shadows of the doorframe, I watch Celeste read in front of the fireplace in the vast library of Drusilla’s estate. I haven’t been in the same place as her in nearly seven decades. Instead, I’ve been aimlessly searching for a cure just like I promised Felix I would almost a hundred years ago. A cure, I fear I won’t discover before it’s too late. Why I felt called to visit now is beyond me. Maybe because things are rumored to finally be coming to another head with Esme, and I’m worried about Felix’s wrath. Maybe because I’m a glutton for punishment. Or maybe because I can’t stop hoping by some lucky chance Celeste is finally ready to forgive me for what I was forced to do nearly a century ago.

My chest aches as I succumb to a feeling I suddenly realize Felix is all too accustomed to.

Heartache.

Despair.

Longing, yearning.

A devastating sickness spreads across my skin as I unfortunately come to the understanding he was right.

I shouldn’t have changed her.

Then again, losing her would have surely sent me spiraling into a hell I’d never have the strength to climb out of.

If she had died, I would've, too.

I’d have grabbed the nearest stake and quickly joined her in the afterlife. No second thought about it, because an eternity together in damnation is better than a lifetime spent apart.

Her eyes lift and bitterly lock on mine. A furious, unforgiving fire burns in her hazel irises before she shifts in her seat, turns her back on me, and flips the next page.

Maybe burning for all eternity in hell would be a welcome change to the cold shoulder she’s given me for the last century. Regardless, I’ll stand by waiting for as long as it takes for her to forgive me. It’s a silent promise I intend to keep no matter how many times she shows me just how intent she is on blocking me out of her life.

“I once looked at Draven the same way,” Drusilla sighs, padding up to my side. “She’ll get over her jaded heart eventually. You just need to give her time.”

“She’s had a century,” I whisper, as Celeste rises from her seat, walks to the nearest shelf, adds the book in her hands to the large volume of romance novels, and then peruses the titles for something more interesting. “But, I’d wait a lifetime if it meant she’d finally forgive me with her last dying breath.”

Drusilla sadly shakes her head.

“Over time she will realize half of the responsibility for her current state rests on her shoulders. You’re not entirely to blame.” Glancing the Queen’s way, my brow furrows as I wait for her to elaborate. “A calling was placed on her life long before you ever entered the picture, Talon. With that comes risks. What happened was always a possibility. One day, she’ll hopefully realize it was better she met her fate at the loving hand of someone who cared for her instead of a monster who would’ve happily drained her dry until there was nothing left, not even a pile of dust to be taken away on a doomed wind into the afterlife.”

Her comment doesn’t sit well with me. Not just because it hints at hope I’m not sure I’m lucky enough to put my faith in, but because it also suggests the stories we’ve all heard about her and the King are wrong.

“Forgive me for being so bold but, is that how you eventually felt about King Draven?”

The Queen’s spine straightens bitterly from the mention of the late King’s name. She’s refused to speak much about her late husband since his demise. But seeing as recent events have uncovered hidden truths that could’ve been beneficial for the coven to know sooner, I am hopeful she answers and doesn’t ignore whatever truth she’s successfully kept hidden the last several hundred years.

“King Draven was very hard to resist. I constantly was at war with my feelings for him.”

“Why?”

After a moment of intense silence, she harrowingly whispers, “Because falling for him would’ve destroyed me.” Her eyes drift sorrowfully to mine. “The connection between us was forbidden. He was Ember’s mate. Not mine.”

“But he loved you,” I argue. “He wanted you. Forbidden or not, wasn’t that enough.”

Shaking her head, the Queen of the Damned smiles sadly and says, “The threat of unrequited love makes fools of wise men.”

As if pulled on a magnetic wire, my gaze drifts longingly back Celeste’s way. She sits gracefully back down in her chair and begins thumbing through the pages of her new book. Shaking my head, my mind screams yes when my heart knows better.

“There was a time I pushed Draven away because of the threat that he was never mine to keep. It always hung over my head that one day, he’d eventually feel the calling on his life to my sister. A woman who by destiny’s hand was chosen for him, and there was nothing I could do about it.”

“Are you saying Celeste pushes me away because she knows we are not meant to be?”

“Perhaps,” the Queen suggests. “Or maybe she fights her feelings for you because she’s scared. Scared that giving in would inevitably burst whatever deliriously smitten bubble you’ve both found yourselves in.”

Stunned to silence, the Queen and our eyes meet with tragic understanding. She gives me a small smile and adds, “Sometimes, it’s better to let the fantasy live because it gives you life. Losing the fantasy risks losing the thrilling vitality that’s currently bringing you more joy than you’ve ever known.”

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