Page 66 of F*ck Marriage

“She was feeling under the weather.”

“She seemed fine in the office this afternoon.”

I glance at Satcher. What’s he getting at? I’m frankly quite glad Pearl isn’t here to ruin the night. Let her stay at home sipping her organic tea and feeling superior.

“Well, you know how it goes. This time of year there’s always something sneaking up on you.” Woods smiles stiffly and I notice he already has a cocktail in hand.

“Hey, do you mind getting me one of those?” I ask.

He smiles genuinely for the first time and nods at Jules and Satcher before heading to the bar.

“I think I’ll get a drink too,” she announces. “Something about Woods’ face makes me want to drink…”

“I’ll get it for you,” Satcher says, touching her arm.

“No, I’m fine. This is your Christmas party, my love. You mingle.”

I recoil at the pet name. She leaves and then there’s just Satcher and me standing awkwardly in the middle of the room. My tongue feels caked with awkwardness, all elbows and knees.

“Didn’t your mama ever tell you that you should never let an old flame burn you twice?”

“You have more dick in your personality than your pants, you know that, Satch?”

“What do you think is gonna happen, Billie? Everyone gets hurt in this scenario.”

I glance at the bar. Jules and Woods are on opposite ends not looking at each other.

“What scenario, Satcher?” I say his name with the same amount of vinegar he used to say mine. “He’s getting me a drink.”

I feel like he’s judging me for something I haven’t even done. He shakes his head, disappointed. Before either of us can say another word, Woods returns with my drink. After he hands it to me he stands close, almost protectively. I wonder who he wants to protect me from and my eyes fall on Satcher. There is something happening between them even now, some silent exchange of eyes.

“Come on,” Woods says, steering me away. “This is your party, you should mingle.”

I allow him to lead me away from Satcher. Despite the hard dread rolling around in my stomach, the night is a smashing success. Everyone marvels about the restaurant’s ambience, and when the food arrives theyoohandahhover the presentation. Woods never leaves my side, and it almost feels like it used to when we were together. I make a joke and he laughs, looking at me like I’m the funniest person alive. He makes a joke and I joke that it’s not funny at all, and then everyone else laughs. It’s a thing we’ve always done, and it works—we’re funny together. People always said we had this chemistry that you feel. I’d thought so too until the day he up and left me. During the dinner, when I look over at Jules, she’s glaring at him like she wants to rip his throat out. Satcher, on the other hand, won’t look at me at all. When I’m at the bar grabbing a drink and taking a second to breathe away from everyone, Loren comes up behind me. Resting her elbows on the bar, she grins at me.

“I’ve had too much to drink,” she says.

“Me too,” I admit.

“Is that why it looks like you and Woods are about to fuck?”

I give her a look, the look that sayswatch it!

“Everyone can see it. There’s so much sexual energy between the two of you I think it charged my phone.”

“Shut up,” I say, laughing. “He’s the boss, I’m the boss—we’re just working the room, making sure everyone is having a good time.”

“Well, Satcher’s the boss too and all he’s done all night is scowl at you.”

I frown. “He’s being a dick.”

“Maybe he’s just worried about you.”

I pause to consider and then I decide against it. “Please—” My words falter because I don’t know what else to say.

I glance over my shoulder at the long mahogany table. Jules is leaning into him, nestled like she’s freezing and he’s the only warmth. He has his arm slung casually around her shoulders. I feel a pang of jealousy and push it away. I’d been there, underneath his warm consideration. When he pins his attention on you he makes you feel like the only woman on the planet.

The bartender hands me my drink, and I lean my back against the bar surveying the scene. I refuse to have a headstone there. I will not let Satcher Gable have any power over me whatsoever. It was ... and then it was over and that is that.

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