Page 53 of Baby Me

Kate gently touched my shoulder, rocking it alittle.

“Cam? The toilet’s notworking.”

“Go back to sleep, Kate. I’ll have a look atit.”

“I onlypeed.”

“That’s good. Don’t worry aboutit.”

“Yeah, but what if I need to go to the bathroom again? My stomach feelsfunny.”

“All right, I’ll have a look at it now,then.”

I slid out of bed as languorously as I could and went to the bathroom to check the toilet; at least, that’s what Kate thought I was doing. I quickly removed the pregnancy stick I’d acquired from Silvia earlier in the day from the cabinet, dipped it in the pee, and lowered it to the counter. She used these ones to test animal pregnancies, but she’d told me that the hormone levels would be detected the same way. The next three minutes of waiting felt like forever. I quickly twisted the knob and released the water into the toilet. Once it was full, I flushed it, then knowing in the back of my mind that the three minutes hadn’t passed, I glanced back at the pregnancy test. Two small red lines had appeared on the small whitestrip.

Fuck, what does thatmean?

I wasn’t sure if that meant we’d have two kids instead of one; yet I knew that couldn’t be true because how could a fucking stick know how many kids we’d have from a pee sample? Maybe it meant that it was a definite negative. A positive sign should have been a plus, shouldn’tit?

I quickly grabbed the box the tests had come in. My hands were shaking. In another minute or two Kate would ask me what was taking so long, and I wasn’t sure how long I could keep a secret from her and not give in. I found a section where the pregnancy test showed two lines and read the word: “PREGNANT.”

“Holy shit!” I sighed with disbelief, and felt a sudden drumbeat in my chest. It was fierce and hard as I realized I’d created a human being that I would certainly love for the rest of my life. I stashed the pregnancy test in the back of the cabinet, where I knew Kate wouldn’t look, and then returned to ourbedroom.

“What was wrong with the toilet?” sheasked.

“The valve was turned off. I think I shut it off by accident when I washed the floorearlier.”

“You washed thefloor?”

“Yeah, why are you sosurprised?”

“I remember when you washed my floor back in Pace. You werehot.”

“I was hot? You’re the one who was drooling over apriest.”

“Well, is it my fault that you make a sexy priest? There aren’t many men as domesticated as you in this world, you know. And you were supposed to be resting allday.”

“I’m feeling just fine, and you’re wrong, baby. I know plenty of domesticated men – my brothers, for one, and most of Mother’semployees.”

“Well, your brothers are an exception, and as for manservants, they’re paid to do what they’re told. It doesn’tcount.”

“Fine, have it yourway.”

She twisted in bed, scooting closer tome.

“It’s not having my way. It’s how it is. Men like you arerare.”

“And women like you are even rarer.” I kissed the future momma on her forehead, wondering how in the world I’d keep the biggest news I’d ever had a secret for another twelve hours or so, and prayed that she wouldn’t find out on her own. It would take a lot of creativity to keep heroccupied.

“You’re sweet. I’m gonna go back to sleep now. Tomorrow’s a bigday.”

Yeah, it definitely wouldbe.

“I love you,Kate.”

“I love youtoo.”

She lay back down, pulled the covers all the way up to her chin, and turned to her side. I spooned her, wrapping her in my arms, and held her against me. She was warm and soft and so delicate that I’d kill anyone who ever wanted to harm her. Then the urge to actually touch her tummy grew. I wanted to show her how much I loved her and the little baby she was carrying in her stomach and didn’t even know it. But touching her over her belly like that would make her suspicious, so I just held her as close as possible, knowing that soon enough I could place my hand over that growing stomach and feel our baby kick. I knew that it would be one of the most wonderful kicks I’d everexperienced.

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