Page 17 of Crave

I’m not sure what happened after she mentioned Tracy being pregnant. The sense of betrayal that I felt years ago was reinforced by that pregnancy, and before I could reign myself in, I reacted, and for the first time since this feud started, I regret my actions.

I don’t regret any of the things I said, but I regret not doing it when Sandy was out of hearing range because the nagging feeling that I have in the back of my mind just won’t go away. Maybe she was turned off by what she witnessed and left because of me. I run a hand through my hair and let out a loud sigh of frustration reminiscent of the frustration I felt when I turned around only to find her gone. I searched every inch of the first floor. It was only when I remembered seeing the bakery van that I ran outside, but it was already gone.

“Fucking Troy,” I say right before I fall back on my couch.

Zeus and Lady must sense my distress because they both come running towards me. Lady jumps on top of me and starts to sniff my hand as Zeus puts his big head on my chest.

I scratch him behind the ears and I’m rewarded with a lick on my face.

“You know what, guys?” I say to my dogs. Lady barks. “Sorry, Lady. I meant to say guy and girl. How about I look her up? Let’s see if she’s on social media. She works in a pediatrician’s office right here in Milton. I bet we can find her in no time. Come on. Let’s help Daddy find his girl.”

As if they understand me, they follow me into my home office. They sit on either side of me as I turn on my laptop. As soon as it comes on, I do a search for pediatricians in the area. And because the gods must want us together, I find her picture and profile in the first website I click on.

“Shit. Is she real, guys? Any woman who looks this good in pink scrubs can’t possibly be real,” I say to them. Lady jumps up as she barks, and Zeus continues to breathe with his tongue sticking out of his mouth.

“I know the feeling, buddy,” I say to Zeus as I lay one hand on his head and continue to stare at the computer screen, my mouth going dry at the site of her smiling face. She has her hair down and flat, but she has another floral headband on her head, this one with white flowers. Her eyes are warm and bright, and I swallow at the sight of her breasts underneath that pink top.

A quick read of her bio tells me that she’s been a nurse for almost five years and prior to working at the pediatrician’s office, she was a labor and delivery nurse.

I type her name in Facebook and find her public page. Her profile picture is of her holding a glass of white wine as her hair blows wild and free, just like the long white dress she’s wearing. She completes the outfit with another floral headband.

I consider sending her a friend request but decide against it, not ready to deal with the possible rejection of my request. I decide against showing up at her job. A random guy showing up at a pediatrician’s office without a kid might get me arrested. I don’t want to put her on the defensive by just showing up where she works, and that’s the same reason I rule out showing up at her house.

The last option is my least favorite because that means I’ll have to wait almost a damn week.

“She works at the bakery every Saturday, guys. Daddy will just have to wait until then.”

I hear a woof.

“But what if she’s not there that day, you ask? Well, then I’ll have no choice but to find her at home. Daddy’s not good at waiting. First, though, we need to find some I’m sorry flowers for Grandma.”

“Fuck.” I park my black Cadillac Escalade in my parents' driveway. “What the fuck are they doing here?” Both Troy and Luke’s cars are parked in the circular drive. I grab the purple orchid that I brought for Mom and make my way in through the side door.

I hear voices towards the kitchen and I start to walk in that direction. I stop when I hear my name being mentioned. “Jake can ruin your party and it’s okay, Mom?” Luke asks.

“He didn’t ruin anything,” my mother says in my defense. I can picture her waving her hand dismissively at Luke.

“Like hell. He attacked my wife for being pregnant and we got into a fistfight, Mother!” Troy. Always the damned cry baby.

“If memory serves me correctly, Troy, you threw the first punch.” I almost want to laugh as I imagine the look on Troy’s face at our mother’s words.

“He insulted my wife, Mom. I know you have issues with Tracy, but she’s my wife and the mother of your only grandchild. You’d think that would mean something to you. Jake is not your only son, you know.” I bet he’s running his hands through his hair right now. I know he’s pacing by the sound of footsteps.

“You don’t need to tell me how many children I have, Troy. Your brother is hurting, and he—”

“He gets a pass to act out?”

“What the hell do you two want me to do? You want me to ground him? He’s a grown man.” I can hear the exasperation in her voice.

“It would be nice if he acted like it once in a while, but I want you to hold him accountable,” Troy says.

“You want me to hold him accountable? Troy, what the hell did you think would happen when you decided to steal the girl your brother was dating? She was with him one minute, and the next she was with you. Should I hold you and Tracy accountable too? The way I see it, Jake didn’t start this.”

“We fell in love, Mom. We’ve explained it to him. We’ve apologized. I’ve begged for forgiveness. You realize that my wife refuses to step foot in this house after last night? She’s the mother of your grandchild. The least you can do is welcome her here.”

“When have I not welcomed her? If she doesn’t want to come here anymore, that’s her choice. Tristan and any future grandchildren are loved and will always be welcome here.” Mom’s voice is dismissive.

“He’s ruined this family, Mom,” Luke chimes in. “He ruined your party. He ruined last Christmas. It’s like he takes glee in shitting on this family.”

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