Page 33 of Crave

“That barely covers my midriff. It’s too sexy for a non-date.”

She ignores me and grabs my makeup bag.

“You’re not going out looking like a librarian with Jacob Clark. Have you seen how fine that man is? And he looks at you like he wants to devour you. Why do all of those hot yoga and weight lifting classes if you’re not going to show off that body?”

“Well, we can never be anything serious, so who cares how fine he is?” I put fine in air quotes and give Tash an exaggerated eye roll. “And fine is really subjective. I don’t find himthatattractive. He’s not exactly Shrek, but he’s not Jason Mamoa either.”

Tash ignores me and points to the shirt. I dress, and she drapes an old t-shirt over me before she starts my makeup.

“Uh huh. Not Jason Mamoa. Got it.”

“Or Chris Hemsworth.”

“He’s much hotter than Hemsworth.”

“And let’s not forget he has feelings for another woman,” I remind her.

“You don’t know that. That is the point of this whole date. He’s going to explain. And does it matter? That woman is married to another man. She’s not exactly competition for you. Not that she could ever compete with you.”

“You sure are singing a different tune, Tash. When I first told you about this, you told me to run.”

I know she’s smirking at me, but I have my eyes closed as she applies mascara to my lashes.

“Well, I hadn’t met him then.” She adds light eyeshadow.

“And now that you have?”

“I like him. I think he’ll be good for you.”

“Well, there are too many reasons why we can’t be together,” I remind her before she starts applying lip gloss to my lips.

“Remind me of what those are again?”

I let out a loud sigh. “One, our mother does business with the Clark family. She’s going to be pissed.” I don’t mention how Mom called Jake troublemaker that time at the bakery.

“She’ll get over it,” Tash says. “She can’t control how you two feel about each other.”

“Two, he has feelings for Tracy, who happens to be married to his brother,” I say, the words bitter on my tongue.

“You don’t know that. Tracy is irrelevant.” She hands me the mirror and I look at my reflection, nodding in approval. My makeup is light, but whatever she did to my eyes, they now pop and my lips glimmer with the added gloss.

“Three, he’s completely crazy.”

“He’s unpredictable. Predictability is boring. Remember that.”

“Four, there’s the whole race thing.”

“What race thing?” she asks totally confused.

“Really, Tash? What race thing? I’ll give you a hint. It’s not the Boston Marathon.”

“Oh! That! You can’t be serious, Dee. Who cares? When you find someone you connect with, does that even matter? You’re just trying to create problems.” She puts all the make-up away before turning around to face me.

“Five, I don’t think I have it in me to be in another relationship, to trust another man.”

She looks at me, smiles, and puts a stray piece of hair behind my ear. “Not every man is as fucked up as Derek, okay. It’s all about a connection and chemistry, and you never had it with him. Ever. But you and Jake? You two sizzle. Don’t make every man responsible for the actions of one. Derek is not worth it. Don’t hide.”

I want to believe her words, but the feelings Jake stirs inside of me petrify me.

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