Page 4 of Make Me

He’d never talked to me before that one day, but I’m not surprised if he never noticed me. As one of the few black students in the high school, I was pretty much invisible, which was just the way I liked it.

I still remember the only conversation we ever had.

* * *

Ten years ago

Shit! I shouldn’t have had that second glass of orange juice before I left the house this morning. If I hadn’t, I wouldn’t have had to make the detour to the bathroom. Of course, it was packed, and I had to wait for a stall, making me almost late for class. At least the halls are mostly clear of students. I’d run, but I’m not wearing my good bra and I don’t want the girls hitting me in the face, so I do the best speed-walk I can.

Today’s going to be a shitty day. I knew it from the moment I woke up this morning and Aunt Mae told me my mother called. Then, my bookbag ripped on my way out the door. When I got to school, the only friend I have at Oak Bend High texted to tell me she’s sick and will be absent. Total shit of a day, and it’s not even first period.

I balance my books while I approach the end of the long hallway. All I need to do is take a left, and my English classroom will be right there. I prefer to arrive in class first, take my seat in the back, and disappear into the background.

Just as I approach the corner, I’m hit on the shoulder by another body. I’m pushed to the wall, and the mountain of books in my hands crashes to the floor. The red folder holding my English term paper lands on top of the heap.

“Watch where you’re going!” the person who bumped into me says.

She doesn’t have the decency to stop, but by the sound of her giggles, I know who it is. And there’s no way the school’s most popular senior would give me the time of day. I sigh and drop to the floor to pick up my things. My heart starts to beat erratically because if there’s one thing I know—wherever Candace is, he’s never too far behind.

I’m proven right. A pair of black boots enters my line of vision. Cooper Stevens. Those are his boots. He was wearing them the very first time I saw him, and I remember wanting to be swallowed up by the ground. The only thing that saved me from total embarrassment was the fact that I know someone like him would never notice someone like me.

I hold my breath while he approaches and quickly turn to my books. Please leave. Please leave. Please leave. I busy myself arranging my books. I won’t stand up until he walks past me. Only he doesn’t. He drops down to my level and grabs my red folder. Instead of handing it to me, he opens it and starts to look through the pages.

I finally find the courage to look at him, and our eyes lock. For the first time ever, I notice the hazel flecks around his brown eyes. I look away and drop my head, and because this is the day from hell, my glasses slide off my face and land on the floor.

We reach for them at the same time, and his large hand ends up covering mine. I let out a small sound, and I say a silent prayer that he didn’t hear it. I note the contrast of our skin tones, his white hand covering my brown one before I pull mine away. He lifts my glasses and brings them to my face. I’m as still as a statue while I look down at the linoleum floor. He moves closer and slides the glasses back onto my face. I take a deep breath and bask in the smell of his leather jacket mixed with his fruity shampoo.

When he gets the glasses on my face, he moves his hands behind my ears to make sure they are secure.

“You okay?” he asks. He lifts my chin and forces me to look at him.

Like a deer in headlights, all I can do is stare.

“Be careful next time, Laces,” he whispers.

I lick my dry lips. “Um, my name is—” The words get locked in my throat. I grab my books and finally stand up. He stands right along with me. When we’re both upright, he takes a step closer.

“Your name is what?” he asks. He hands me my folder, and when I take it from him, his fingers touch mine.

“Um, my name is—” I clear my throat and try again. The entire time he stares at me with an expression I can’t interpret. “My name isn’t, um—” I never get a chance to finish my sentence.

“Cooper!” Candace yells in the hallway. She runs over to us and grabs the sleeve of his leather jacket. “Come on! What are you still doing here with her?” She points at me without bothering to look in my direction. “Let’s go. You did your good deed of the day. Maybe you should tell her to run a flat iron through that hair.” The entire time he was being dragged away, his head was turned in my direction, until they turned the corner and he disappeared.

Ivy’s loud laugh pulls me from my thoughts. I haven’t thought about that day in years.

I can still remember my burning cheeks when Candace made that dig about my hair. The truth was, I liked my tight curls. It took a lot of work to get it like that, but mean girls like Candace don’t care about the details.

I finally look away from my daughter and the mutt and stare back into his eyes. The same brown as they were ten years ago. He’s even taller now. And broader. I still remember the muscles on display yesterday morning. I’d never seen him shirtless before yesterday, but I can’t imagine he had all those tattoos on his back in high school.

At least he’s covered now, but even the gray tee shirt he’s wearing drapes perfectly across his chest. I don’t know why I do it, but I look away and glance at his hands. I can still feel them covering mine, but I force the memory away and clear my throat. But the feel of his hands on my ass creeps in.

“Ivy, come on, baby.” Ivy is now laying on the grass. The dog is laying down too, and they are looking in each other’s eyes.

“Sam’s really good with kids,” Cooper says quickly. “She won’t hurt Ivy.” He raises both hands and says, “I promise.”

Unsure of what to say, I nod. But I make the mistake of looking into his eyes again, and for the life of me, I can’t force myself to look away. Thankfully, Ivy laughs and screams.

“Look, Mama.” I turn to find the dog licking her neck. Now, all I can think of is that I’ll need to give her another bath today.

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