Page 98 of Take Two

“Multiple times per day,” Colt reminds me.

“Because he kept calling,” Vickie says in her defense.

“Why didn’t you block him?” I ask. “And what did you talk about?”

“Blocking me wouldn’t have worked,” Colt says. “There are apps for that, and we talked about our love.”

“Our love?” Vickie asks. “You’ve lost your mind. And how could you side with him, Violet?”

“I would never,” I say, outraged at the thought.

“Nothing wrong with siding with the truth. Now, Violet,” Colt continues, turning back to face me. “When you broke up with these men, did you talk to them, their mama, their brother, and their son every day?”

I side-eye Vickie, who is looking daggers at her husband. She blows flour in his face, and says, “I’m not cooking for you anymore. I quit.” She tosses a pork chop on top of the flour and starts to walk away, but he pulls her to him and puts her back to his chest. He wraps his arms tightly around her.

“Um, no,” I admit. “All of my breakups were final.”

“Colt, I told you it was over,” Vickie says.

“I don’t remember that. Did you put it in writing?” he asks. “Did you send me a certified letter stating our relationship was over?”

“No one does that,” she says. “But Isaidit to you, and you know it.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I have no memory of this conversation you allege.”

“Oh, Son,” Mary Leigh says. “I admit, you make some fine points.” She giggles at her son and Vickie.

“You know he’s lying, Mary Leigh,” Vickie says. “If his sperm hadn’t gone rogue and attached itself to my egg without permission—”

“Victoria Chastain!” Mary Leigh admonishes. “We are not going to talk about sperm in the kitchen.” I try to hide my grin when she lowers her voice to say the word sperm.

“Do you need me to get the soap, Mama?” Colt jokes.

“Not yet, but she’s on thin ice,” Mary Leigh warns while pointing her index finger at Vickie.

“Sorry, Mama,” Vickie says while she tries to pinch her husband. He manages to knock her hand away.

“Now, we’re going to put an end to this breakup nonsense once and for all. We’re going to the highest court on earth. Johnny! Come to Daddy.” A few seconds later, Johnny comes running into the kitchen. He holds his arms up for his daddy,who lets Vickie go long enough to pick him up. “Did Daddy and Mama ever break up?” he asks the toddler.

“No!” Johnny yells into the kitchen. Colt kisses his cheek and tickles his belly before he puts him down. Johnny runs out of the kitchen and goes back to his brother.

“The Supreme Court of Johnny just ruled,” Colt says. “It’s the highest court in the world.”

“SCOJ,” I say.

“Violet!” Vickie exclaims. “Really?”

“He’s a cute little Supreme Court Justice,” I say in my defense.

Colt pounds his fist on the counter. “Case closed.” He grabs his wife again and gives her a loud kiss. “Now, go make your husband his dinner.” He slaps her butt and walks away.

“You are such a caveman,” she yells to his retreating back. He turns and pounds his fists on his chest.

“Okay, I must admit, he made a strong case. He made some valid arguments.” I giggle at Vickie’s scowling face. “But I still believe you,” I whisper.

“I dumped him,” she says. “And everyone here knows it.” She points a finger at Charlie and Mary Leigh. They both put their hands up and look away.

“Okay, ladies, let’s finish up here. Let’s cook the pork chops and then you both are going to mash the potatoes. Time for me to inspect your work,” Mary Leigh says.

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