Page 39 of Friend Zoned

“Katherine, what the hell are you talking about?” I try to walk around her, but she blocks me. I pretend to go in the opposite direction, then fake her out by spinning and going the other way. She jumps on my back and tries to put me in a headlock. I back up against the wall and trap her. She tries to tighten her hold around my neck, but I grab her arm and push her into the wall.

“Okay! Stop. You win, jerk.”

I move away and she slides down my back. “Stop being so damn nosy,” I warn, knowing full well, she’s not going to listen.

“I saw her. It was brief, but I saw her, and I’ve been standing out here the entire time eavesdropping. You have two seconds to tell me everything before I hack into your phone and call her myself.” She stands in front of me, blocking my path again. I lift her and set her aside, but she catches up to me and tries to stick her hand in my pocket. I know she’s going for my phone. I grab her wrist and pull her hand out of my pocket.

“Lincoln, come get your wife,” I yell at my brother-in-law.

“Aid’s got a woman,” she says to her husband. He’s as nosy as she is, and his eyes light up at the news.

“Well, invite her over,” he says.

“He’s keeping her from us.”

Just as the words leave her mouth, our mother lets out an undignified giggle.

“With good reason,” Lincoln says, jerking his thumb toward our mother and Eduardo.

“She’s black,” Katherine says. I’m seconds away from snapping at her.

“So?” Lincoln shrugs his shoulders.

“Exactly. So, why are you keeping her from us?” She puts both hands on her hips, still standing in my way.

“You have five seconds before I put you through that wall. And I’m not keeping her from you. Do you really expect me to bring her here?” I look to the living room to find my dad staring at my mother and Eduardo. Whatever he’s thinking, it’s not going to be good for my mom’s boyfriend. “She’s my friend.”

“Friend, my ass.” When she doesn’t move, I run to her and lift her off her feet. She yells and kicks, but I throw her over my shoulder and start to spin around the room. “I’m gonna puke, idiot!” she warns. She will if I don’t stop. So, I spin around a couple of more times before I put her down. She starts to hit me, so I take both her wrists in mine and drag her to her husband.

“You might as well tell us everything, or you won’t get a moment’s peace. I hope she’s nicer than that last woman you were with. What was her name? Lizette?” My sister rolls her eyes. “All she ate was watercress and about three ounces of fish the last time we went out to dinner. And she was rude to the waitstaff. I’m glad you got rid of her.”

I cross my arms and wait for her to finish. Lincoln puts an arm around her and kisses her temple.

“Are you done? Yes, I remember.” That was a fucking nightmare. I should have ended it that night, but I kept her around for another three months. I guess that was easy to do since I was away a lot. “Like I said, she’s a friend. Drop it.”

Of course, she won’t. She approaches me while I pour myself a glass of red wine.

“If she’s just a friend, why are you going to see her tomorrow?” I stare at her, and all she says is, “I told you I was listening behind the door.”

“You are a forty-two-year-old woman who runs a conglomerate. Act like it.”

“You might as well tell her or she’s going to drive you crazy, and me by extension,” Lincoln says. “Besides, I’m intrigued. Hurry up before the rest of the family joins the conversation.”

They both sit at the long kitchen island and wait. Lincoln starts to tap his fingers on the marble as if he’s impatient.

“I like her, but she put me in the friend zone. I’m biding my time.”

Katherine shrieks like a five-year-old and claps her hands. She jumps off the stool and hugs me as if I just said something significant.

“How soon until you bring her over for dinner? Or maybe we can go out? Does she like kids? Please tell me she eats more than three ounces of food at a time. Oh, does she—”

“Can you take out her battery?” I ask Lincoln. “It’s a little complicated,” I tell them.

Her excitement ebbs. “Is she married?” I shake my head no. “Is she in a relationship? As long as she’s not married.”

“She’s single.”

“Oh? Then what? She has kids?”

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