Page 8 of Capri

“I didn’t answer, and I never plan to. I owe that man nothing,” I tell her honestly. I have to let her feel like she’s contributing to me feeling better.

Collie crosses her arms as the waiter delivers our drinks and fresh bread. “Good. You worried me there for a second.”

I tilt my head. “Cols, you always worry about me. I’ve been through worse than a deceiving husband; I can handle Drew.”

That’s an understatement.

“I’m sorry,” Collie exhales. “I know you can, but I literally want to throat punch him for what he did to you. Sleeping with your best friend for yourentiremarriage—I mean, who does that?”

“Apparently, a man I thought was worthy enough to call my husband.”

“Not to mention after…” Collie’s voice cracks.

She doesn’t even have to finish her sentence. “I know,” I whisper. “I should have known. There were so many signs. But I couldn’t see past the unbearable pain. It was one of the darkest times in my life, Cols. I’m not sure I’d be okay today without you.”

Collie’s been the one person in my life that has always shown up for me. She held me while my heart shattered unexpectedly and my husband was a ghost. Nowhere to be found until days later, only for him to then act as if nothing happened.

If I could go back in time, I’d do things differently. Show up for myself more and refuse to let him get away with abandoning me so easily.

It’s peculiar how clear things are once all the pieces are finally revealed. Now, not one part of me cares what he was doing during that time.

The people who loved methenand love mestillwere there.

“I’m not saying what happened was for a reason; I’d never want that for you, but maybe there’s a silver lining behind all of it. A reason your heart had to break in order to find yourself again.”

I think about that every day.There has to be something beautiful coming to make the challenging years worth it in the end.

A rainbow of hope.

Now, the challenge is discovering who I am now that I’m not a wife and before that, Drew’s girlfriend?

That’s all I’ve ever been to the people in my life. Not even a teacher.

Coming to Capri is my chance for a sabbatical on my terms. It’s also the place my parents first met—hence, gifting me with the name.

“That’s what I’m hoping for. That’s all I could ever hope for. I think I deserve a little bit of good, right? Something to show for all this shit I’ve been through,” I ask her, smiling to lighten the mood.

“Not to mention, taking it like a fucking champ.” Collie reaches for my hand. “You deserve all the good, babe. Every last bit of it.”

Our conversation settles as we enjoy our meal and reminisce on being younger without responsibilities.

My eyes find a candy emporium across the cobblestone square, and excitement rushes through me.

“Remember those shops?” I point to the red and white candy store and Collie turns to look. “Mom and Dad used to take us to the little one in the mall growing up.”

Collie laughs. “Yeah, you always got those mini jawbreaker things that you claimed were actually chewy when we all knew they weren’t.”

“They are chewy!”

“Never have I ever met a jawbreaker that wasn’t hard. Hence,jawbreaker,Capri.”

I giggle. “Whatever. You’re one to talk. You always got the cotton candy jelly beans. If you wanted cotton candy, why not get the real thing?”

Her face scrunches up. “One, because ew. And two, because it’s not the same thing.”

“I beg to differ,” I tell her confidently. “I think I’m gonna go check it out. Think they’re just as good?” My brows peak in question.

“Probably not.” Collie giggles before taking a big sip of her drink. “If this is your way of letting loose, I love to see it.” She eyes me sarcastically.

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