Page 89 of Capri

“Will you tell me about it?” he asks.

Here it goes. I know once I start talking I won’t be able to stop the tears. But I’ll do it for him. If it helps ease the hurt of his day just by a little.

I nod. “Two years ago, I was pregnant.” Jones instantly tugs me closer, allowing me to continue. “Drew and I were married for three years and decided we wanted to start a family. I was ecstatic when we found out. So was he.” I smile to myself, recalling the memory clear as day. It was the happiest I had ever seen him. I take a deep breath. “I made it to the third trimester at twenty-eight weeks before an ultrasound discovered there was no heartbeat. One moment our baby boy was healthy and growing as he should, and the next, gone just like that.”

“Fuck. Capri. Let me hold you, sweetheart.” He shelters me in his protection.

I lean into Jones like a lifeline, reliving my worst nightmare. “I got to hold him, Jones.” I cry, no longer caring how much of thereal mehe sees but thankful to have him listen. “He was the most perfect little angel, and I was his mommy. Whether I got to play that part for life or not. At that moment, he was my entire world, and I was his.”

“You are so brave. So brave. So strong,” he whispers affirmations into my ear. “He’s lucky to have a mother as resilient and loving as you.”

I choke down a sob. “For so long, I felt like something was wrong with me. Like I wasn’t healthy enough to grow my child. The doctors and nurses tried everything. How does that even happen? How does a heartbeat just stop with no explanation? I was angry at God for taking him away from me. Angry at myself for not being the mother he needed. But I knew I owed it to Stevie to make my life count and be something that made a difference for him. It took me a while to get to that point, but that’s why I went into teaching.”

“Stevie? A strong name for a strong boy,” Jones whispers. My lips quiver, a rush of tears escaping no matter how hard I try to contain them.

I nod. “The strongest boy.”

“Can I ask you something?” He’s gentle with his approach.

“Anything.”

There’s nothing he could ask me that I won’t tell him.

“Was losing Stevie what caused a rift in your marriage?”

I answer without hesitation. “Not at all. Our problems started long before that. It explains why Drew’s affair went on for so long. Even while I was pregnant, he was sleeping with my best friend. After Stevie’s funeral, the shift between us became much more evident. He was never around, and when he was, he was so distant it wouldn’t have mattered. I was always his enemy, and I never understood it. I mean, I was privileged to carry the most beautiful baby boy for twenty-eight weeks and lose him tragically. I know Drew lost him, too, but I spent days in recovery without a husband by my side and with new scars to look at for the rest of my life, reminding me of our boy. He could have been present for at least that. So, no. That was just the stone that shattered it.”

“The bastard just abandoned you at a time like that? While you were mourning and recovering?” The venom in his tone is there, but there’s always pain. He feels pain for me.

I nod. “I was numb. All I cared about was Stevie, enough to mask the hurt of Drew not being there. Collie was there. And my parents. That was enough for me.”

Jones ponders my words. He holds me and listens, letting me cry and being a shoulder to lean on. “Thank you for sharing that with me, Capri. I know it must be scary to open yourself up to someone like that. I struggle with it too.”

“Is your mother really all you have left?”

He nods, lazily running his thumb over my hand. “She is, unfortunately. Tommy died of a freak boating accident. Honestly, it could have happened to any of us. That’s why I’m so anal about checking over the yachts thoroughly before sailing. He was supposed to take over Archer Chartering. My father left it to him.”

“In return, leaving it to you?” He nods.

“I’m not sure why I care or try. I was never his first choice. He made that clear.”

“Because he’s still your dad. That says more about the man you are and less about him.”

Jones takes in my every word. “But at what cost, you know? My mother is halfway across the world, alone, so I can keep his legacy alive. It feels a little twisted.”

I search for his eyes, begging him to see my heart. “You may be old enough to have children of your own, but you’re still his child. I’d be worried if you didn’t care. But at the same time, you can’t forget to live, Jones. You deserve that, at the very least.”

This isn’t how I expected our night to go, but I’m glad about it. It seems Jones and I have a lot in common and feel safe enough to share with each other. I can’t remember the last time I shared something private with someone other than Collie.

He nods solemnly. “The pressure gets to be a lot. To be all things to both of them. Even when he’s six feet under.”

I caress the side of his face, steering him to look at me. “You’re here now. That’s what matters. You have time to figure out the rest. Okay?”

He kisses my forehead and it’s as if a switch flips. “Okay, enough of the sad shit, beautiful. Time to drown ourselves in junk food and alcohol.”

“Don’t forget the trashy TV,” I remind him.

Jones smiles. “I knew I liked you for a reason. Get over here, woman.”

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