Page 22 of Unmasking You

As soon as his drink is ready, he leaves the shop and keeps walking, as if what’s inside his head is more important than what’s happening outside it.

Another dog owner stops him, and it gives me time to observe him. I’m too far away to see his face in detail, but his demeanour is shouting,“I’m at my limit.”I watch him as the dogs sniff one another and try to run away from them, while Jamie looks tired and a bit dejected. He wears dishevelled amazingly well, even if he looks too pale. I’d bet everything I have that he probably didn’t sleep at all.

I wish he was like last night—before he saw me—tranquil and with a small smile on his face. That smile… the one I loved when we were boys, because it made my heart beat as fast as a race car. The same smile I want so much to curve his lips when he’s looking at me.

It surprised me that the guy who was never friends with anyone, who used to talk only to me—for a long time only when I asked questions—has become this chatty bee moving from person to person like they’re flowers in blossom.

Am I jealous? Yes. Again, a thousand times,yes.

It’s childish and wrong. However, I wish I was the one Jamie wanted to spend his time with. Instead, I’m reduced to following him around ,having glimpses of him when I’m sure he’s not aware of it.

Am I going to stop being a stalker? No. A thousand times, no.

Now that he’s come back into my life—or I’ve come into his, really—I want to have the chance to apologise and make up for the pain I inflicted, even if it’ll take me a hundred years to do it.

I lean forward slowly to make sure I’m not spotted and take a few more seconds to admire the person who’s become my obsession. He’s still walking around, enjoying the sunny winter’s day. It’s not raining, and that’s a blessing, but not even the horrible weather would have stopped me from being here today.

I swiftly move backward when Jamie moves, and then, after waiting a few seconds, I poke my head out again. If he walks, I follow, and if he stops, I stop.

Poking my head out again, I’m met with two dark orbs focused on me. My gaze jumps up in search of Jamie’s face to see if I’ll have to come out of my hiding spot and once again be on the receiving end of his anger or if I’m still safe. When I look up, my body sags against the wall in relief. He’s still talking with someone and is very involved in the conversation.

I look down at his feet again, and Queen L is staring at me. Her tongue is hanging out, doggy drool falling from it, and her tail is going left and right, thwapping against Jamie’s leg. I love how he looks down and smiles at her. Yep, I’m jealous.

How would it feel if all his attention was on me? Just for a second, so for that moment I could live without guilt and regret.

She wiggles and pulls, then sits when Jamie gently pulls on the leash.

“Queen, just a minute. We’ll go to the park again before going home if you behave.”

I’m too close if what he’s saying is so clear. I wait until they both get distracted by their friends and I cross the road. Once on the other side, I find another corner from where I watch undisturbed.

I take my phone out and pretend I’m busy with it, while nothing going on over the other side happens without me knowing.

“Baby girl, what’s wrong?”

With the road so quiet and not too wide, hearing Jamie makes it easy enough to know when he’s moving, even if there’s no way I won’t be constantly checking where he is.

I’m becoming obsessed. No, Iamobsessed. Leaving him alone, though, is simply not an option.

He could have me arrested. And yet, here I am.

Queen listens for a few seconds, behaving like an obedient dog, but then she’s turning back to me again. I make it just in time to hide behind the wall before Jamie takes another look around, probably checking what’s making his dog so restless.

I press myself against the wall, close my eyes, and wait for Jamie to arrive and tell me off. When nothing happens, I peek again, and I’m glad when Jamie is still involved in the conversation.

Queen pulls again, and this time the leash detaches, and I’m not sure who’s more surprised, me or the dog. She looks at Jamie, but he’s still talking, and when she sits back, I take a breath of relief. It doesn’t last long, though, before she wanders around. She takes a few steps in the direction she saw me before but then stops. Her nose is probably telling her I’m no longer there.

She sniffs the ground and then the air, and then she’s onto me. I glance at Jamie, but he hasn’t noticed anything, so he’s still unaware of his dog walking free.

That’s good news to me since it means she’s lost me. But it doesn’t last long because after sniffing the air a couple of times, she turns her head in my direction.

“Crap,” I mumble, and get a dark glare from a passer by. I smile, using years of my dad’s teachings, and the man walks away.

I turn just in time to find Queen staring at me, and I swear to God she smiles at me as if we are old friends. And maybe we are after she humped my leg at the coffee shop.

My heart beats faster and faster the closer she gets to me, only to take a breath of relief every time she stops and looks around.

“Queen,” I whisper. “Go back to Jamie.”

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