Page 88 of Ace of Spades

Ifind a stopping point before my eyes start to cross and I’m left with blurred vision from staring at this screen for too long.

No wonder Levi always wears bluelight glasses when he works.

I rub my eyes to give them some relief before I reach forward and shut the laptop on his desk.

The crew wrapped up hours ago and just yesterday I finished fixing up the bike Theo drowned.

It’s now sitting proudly next to the special custom that’s always at the front of the shop. The one nobody is allowed to touch.

I find Levi in the back lot behind the shop, crouched next to his brother’s truck, hands stained with grease, jaw clenched so tight it looks like it hurts.

He’s trying to fix something—something he could’ve left for tomorrow, I’m sure.

But Levi doesn’t leave things undone. Not when it means someone else might have to carry the load.

“You haven’t stopped all day,” I say quietly.

He doesn’t look up.

“Lot of shit that needs doing,” he grits out.

“There’s always going to be shit that needs doing.”

“I can handle it.”

That’s his answer for everything. Like handling it is a badge of honor. Like breaking down is a luxury reserved for other people.

I step closer.

“You’re not a machine, Levi.”

He scoffs under his breath, wipes his hands on a rag, and finally stands. “I’m fine.”

“You’renot.” My voice cracks. “You’re exhausted. You’re angry. You’re carrying everyone on your shoulders like the world’s gonna fall apart if you stop for five minutes. But what aboutyou?”

He stares at me like I’ve slapped him.

“Who’s carryingyou?”

He swallows hard but doesn’t speak.

“Brody leans on you. Theo and Carter depend on you. Evie still calls you when her life falls apart. You’re the anchor at SKC. And now Josie… God, Levi, you're stepping in and being everything for that little girl and no one asked ifyouwere okay doing that.”

“And I get it. I do. You think if you stay busy, you won’t drown. But you’re already drowning and you don’t even see it.”

Silence hangs between us, thick and brutal.

I take a shaky breath, softer now. “You’re not weak if you let someone help. You don’t have to do this alone.”

He finally meets my eyes, and the weight in his gaze nearly buckles me.

“You don’t know what I’ve done,” he whispers. “What I’ve seen. What I’ve lost, Sienna.”

“I don’t have to. I seeyou.Not the tough guy act you feel the need to always put on.You.And I’m still here.”

His breath hitches. Just barely. But I feel it.

“You’re allowed to want something for yourself, Levi. Even if it’s selfish.”