Page 16 of Born into Darkness

“I’d like that,” I whisper and lean my head against his shoulder.

Resting his hand on mine again, he says, “I know the conditions are awful and that you’re seeing me at my absolute filthiest and weakest, but I’m glad I met you, Talia, and I’d like to get to know you better.”

I squeeze his hand back. “I’m glad I met you, too, and you look pretty good for being at your worst. I can’t wait to see what you look like at your best.”

His laugh turns into a cough that leaves him wincing and clutching his chest. Fear races through me as I watch him struggle to get control of himself. I squeeze his hand and wait for his breathing to return to normal, and as soon as it does, I surprise him by cupping his cheek and turning him to face me.

“You will not die and leave me here all alone,” I tell him. “Promise me.”

“I promise I won’t die and leave you here alone.”

We both know it isn’t a promise he can make, but I need to hear it, and he needs something to cling to. I don’t care what line of work he’s in. I know my family, and despite the work they do, I know what kind of men they are, and Max is the same way. Knowing he’s made me this promise will give him the strength to endure Miguel’s beatings. It’ll give him the strength to keep breathing when everything inside him is screaming to give up.

Before I let him go, I run my thumb over the beard he’s grown since being here. “Do you usually have facial hair?”

He gives me a half-smile. “No, I usually shave every day, and it’ll be one of the first things I do when we’re free. It’s driving me crazy. First, a ridiculously long, hot shower, then I’m shaving, and then we’re eating until we can’t move.”

“Sounds like a date,” I tell him, making him smile even bigger. “Just for the record, I’ll be thrilled to shave my legs and armpits. I’m not the kind of girl who has to wear makeup every day, but I do need a shower, and I like to be smooth.” I laugh and add, “At least I’m wearing a sweatshirt and jeans. I’d be so embarrassed if they’d grabbed me in shorts and a tank top with no way to hide how furry I’m getting.”

The sound of his deep laugh brings a smile to my face. It’s the first time I’ve heard a real laugh from him and quickly decide it’s one of my new favorite things. Meeting his eyes once more, I drop my hand and put my head back on his shoulder. We sit, each of us taking comfort from the other, until the door opens and I quickly scoot aside so there’s a couple of feet between us.

I’m expecting our three tormentors, but I’m surprised to see Mateo and his dad with them. I swear I feel Max’s whole body tense, even though we’re no longer touching. I ignore the sneer Miguel is giving me and instead focus on Mateo, who seems to be the rational one in the cartel.

Lorenzo motions in my direction, and Miguel and Juan quickly step towards me. Grabbing my arms, they haul me up as Lorenzo walks over and stops in front of me. His dark eyes study mine, and I don’t know if I should look down and take on a submissive attitude or keep eye contact and show him that I do have a spine. I’m not sure which will turn out better for me, but when I see the hard glint in his eyes and the way they narrow at my willfulness, I quickly look down, deciding that Lorenzo likes his women to be completely subservient to him. I’m not at all surprised. He wouldn’t know what to do with a woman who actually challenged him. A man who doesn’t think he can have an equal in a woman is a very small man indeed.

When my gaze is on the floor, he gives a soft grunt of approval and says, “We need to send a video to your dad.” He reaches out and grabs my chin, forcing my face up to his. I keep my eyes down, earning me another soft noise of approval. I desperately want to meet his eyes and tell him to go fuck himself, but I’m not stupid. I know our lives are in his hands, and I won’t put us at risk for a very fleeting satisfaction, no matter how tempting it might be.

“You don’t look scared enough,” he continues, and my heart starts to race at his words. “Have we been treating you too well?”

He looks over at Miguel and says something in Spanish that has both men laughing. I chance a quick look over at Mateo, but the man’s face is unreadable. He’s at least not laughing along with the others, making me stand by my initial thoughts of him being the most reasonable among them. I’m not stupid enough to think he cares about me, but he is smart enough to know that a ruined prisoner is a useless one. If they kill me or hurt me worse than they already have, my family will hunt them down, and they won’t rest until every single one of them is dead. They will destroy this cartel, leaving nothing behind but the memory of who the Amaya family had once been.

The sound of Max being pulled up has me turning my head in surprise. I try not to show how worried I am about him, but Lorenzo must see something in my eyes, because he gives a soft laugh and tightens his grip on my chin. Leaning closer, he whispers, “You shouldn’t get attached to him, sweetheart, because I doubt he’s going to survive his stay with us.”

He doesn’t wait for a response from me, just barks out an order in Spanish that has Miguel pulling his knife out while Juan and Jose restrain Max so he’s bound between them and unable to move.

Lorenzo pinches my chin between his fingers hard enough to bring my attention back to him. His eyes are cold and empty and so fucking cruel. “You’re going to put on a good show for Daddy, aren’t you, sweetheart? If you do, then your precious Max won’t lose an eye today. But if you don’t, then we’re going to need to provide some motivation.” He lets go of my chin to give my cheek a hard enough smack to sting. “It’s all up to you.”

Max lets out a pained grunt when Miguel grabs him by the neck, placing the tip of his sharp knife right below Max’s left eye. His body freezes in place, knowing that struggling will only cause the blade to sink into the delicate skin.

“I’ll do it,” I quickly say, looking at Lorenzo. “I’ll say anything you want me to.”

“Of course you will, honey,” he tells me with a smug grin. He knew this was always going to be the outcome. A man like Lorenzo is used to getting his way, because he’s the kind of guy who will do anything to ensure he always gets it. It makes me wonder how many times he’s used family members to make men do his dirty work. Threaten a man’s child or wife, and he’ll do just about anything. It makes me hate him all the more and just proves what a weak man he really is.

He grabs his phone and steps back so I’m alone in the shot when he angles the camera lens towards me.

“When I hit record, you’re going to look into the camera and plead for your dad to give me what I’ve asked for. You’re going to tell him that he has one week to comply or the next video is going to be of you getting fucked by all my men, one by one, sweetheart.”

I feel the blood drain from my face at his words while Max hisses out a breath. When I look over, I see the line of blood that’s forming and starting to drip down his cheek. In his anger, he’d struggled against the hold on his arms, and Miguel allowed the blade to sink in. It’s not deep, not yet at least, and there are still two beautiful grey eyes meeting mine. I’m going to do everything I can to make sure it stays that way.

“I’m okay,” I tell him in Russian. “Please don’t fight them.” Looking back at Lorenzo, I say, “I’m ready. You don’t need to hurt him. I’ll say it all.”

He points a finger at me. “You will speak only English. If you start speaking in Russian, Miguel starts cutting.”

“I won’t speak in Russian,” I promise him.

When he nods and hits record, it’s not hard to let the tears fall. I stare into the camera, knowing my dad and brothers will see this, and the thought of them quickly has me sobbing. Lorenzo doesn’t push me to hurry. He’s enjoying this way too much to cut it short. I think about Max and the threat he’s under right now and the horrific images that are now in my head of being raped by a long line of men. It’s not hard to lose my shit. What’s hard is getting myself under control so I can actually speak. Knowing this is my one chance to get a message to my dad, I try like hell to think of how to do it. It’s not live. Even if I manage to yell something in Russian, he’ll just delete it and we’ll start again after Max loses an eye. I can’t risk him getting hurt. The only other option I have is to use sign language.

My hands are shaking, terrified that one of them will notice what I’m doing, but when I hold up my hands and clasp them together like I’m pleading and start talking, no one seems to notice when I move my right hand into the letter A.

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