Page 65 of Sunshine

He stills, his eyes pinning me in place. “You remember that?”

I frown. “I might have had too much to drink, but I remember everything.”

His eyes flash as understanding sinks in. “You wanted me to kiss you?”

“Yes,” I confirm. “But then Jason and I got back together, and I refocused on my relationship with him. And you went back to being moody and distant again. I figured it was all a fluke.”

“That’s why I grew distant. Why I’vestilltried to be.” Wells’s jaw tightens, and on his face is a look so wild and starved it twists inside my stomach. “You sure knew how to fucking make me suffer, sunshine,” he says quietly. And then he closes the distance between us and crashes his lips against mine.

He kisses me like he can’t survive without me for another second. The muscles in his forearm dance beneath honeyed skin as he steadies his grip on me. It’s clear he can’t contain himself any better than I can.

“I’ve loved you every day since the first time I laid eyes on you, Layla Hayes,” he murmurs into my lips. “And I hated you for it, too, because I loved Jason—” He squeezes his eyes shut—the words too painful, too unimaginable to let out. But then his eyes open and I watch as they sharpen on me. “IlovedJason, Layla. He was my best friend, my brother. I loved him with my whole heart. And I hated you because I loved youmore.”

A sob rips through me, guttural and loud. This is all too much—it’s too damn much to bear. I don’t know how to move forward from here.

He presses me against the wall and kisses me again, and mybody ignites at the feel of it. But my mind is too clouded by everything he’s said, and I know we’re both hanging on by a mere thread. It’d be a good idea to take a second to breathe. To come back to this conversation after a bit of a reset.

“I think you should take me home,” I say as I wind my fingers through his hair, tugging lightly on the strands.

He nods, swiping a knuckle against my jaw. “Yeah,” he rasps. “That’s a good idea.”

“But I’m not done talking about this,” I say. “Okay?”

He lets out a low hum and steps back. “Okay,” he says. And then, after blowing out a breath, he tilts his head toward the cabin’s door. “Let’s go.”

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

THEN

It’s the first Friday of June and the humidity is oppressive. If it weren’t for the delicate breeze that caresses our sweat-slicked skin as it rolls in off the ocean, I don’t think I’d have it in me to be here at the Senior Bondfire, evenifit’s to celebrate Jason’s graduating class.

Truthfully, it’s not just the thick air that’s got me bothered. The buzzing of a brand-new anxiety has been rattling through me for weeks knowing all of this is coming: Jason has officially finished high school, and he’ll be off to his first year as an Aggie at Texas A&M. I’ll barely have a chance to prepare myself to be trapped in Saddlebrook Falls for anothertwo yearswhile my handsome and successful football-playing boyfriend is moving on with his life somewhere new and exciting. Somewhere that he gets an opportunity to start being whoever he wants to be and doesn’t have to continue living up to the expectations set for the mayor’s son or god’s gift to our stifling town.

Needless to say, as happyas I am for him—truly, he deserves that scholarship after how hard he’s worked his whole life—I’m dreading the fact that he has to leave me to chase those dreams. I’ve spent most of the last two years molded in the space at Jay’s side. We’ve not only grown in our love for each other, but in the easy friendship that continues to bloom so big and bright between us.

“You’re in your head again,” Jason murmurs as we trudge hand in hand through the soft sand toward his classmates, who are gathered near the shore. He knows enough about my headspace these days, and has been paying extra close attention to my emotions. And it’s nice . . . even though it makes me feel like more of a sour puss raining sad puddles down instead of the happy and supportive girlfriend I’m trying like hell to be.

“I know,” I say as I look up at him, watching a lock of his golden hair bounce on a long stride. “I’m sorry.”

He squeezes my hand. “Hey, none of that. You have nothing to be sorry for. But we still have two months before I leave,” he reminds me,again, and lets out a sigh. “Tonight is nothing more than a silly senior tradition. So let’s try to have a little fun, okay?”

My temples pulse at his careful tone, a dose of shame radiating out into the space between us. I might be able to slip on a mask for most things in my life, but when it comes to Jason and my fear of losing everything we’ve built . . . It’s a struggle.

It’s not lost on me that I promised myself I’d never let a boy in so deep that I couldn’t imagine a future without him—but that rule was based on my desire to leave this place and my refusal to let anyone change my mind. It’s ironic, really, that the boy I fell for is the one now leavingmebehind.

Up ahead, someone blows an air horn, and I’m lassoedback into the moment. I force a smile on my face and nod. “Okay,” I agree.

I’m able to shake myself out of my anxious haze as soon as we reach the rest of the group. Erin throws her arms around me when she sees me, and I say my hellos to Brad and Ethan. Jason pours beer into a plastic cup from a keg sitting in a kiddie pool of ice, and I dive into conversation with Matt and Haley who show up only minutes after we do.

I’m not the only non-senior here—Regan came with her older brother, Ian, a senior hockey player. Lizzie is here with her sister, Amanda, who’s been president of the yearbook club for the last two years, and David is even here—though I’m not sure who he came with.

It’s a large crowd of Mustangs, expanding beyond the social circles of the football team and cheerleaders, and it’s a subtle reminder that life beyond our treasured football program does exist. A reminder that I’ll find a new place within the layers of it all next year without Jason, that I’ll be okay.

At least I’ll still have cheer.

About an hour after we arrive, Wells shows up with a brunette on his arm that I’ve never seen before. She’s wearing the red T-shirt that all the seniors have on to celebrate their class, but it’s too big for her. I have a feeling she’s not a senior, which means it must be Wells’s shirt . . . and I’m not sure why but it bothers me that she’s wearing it. That he’d let her parade around in something of his like that.

Not that it’s my place to have an opinion where Wells Bennett is concerned. Frankly, he can do whatever—whomever—he wants. It’s just . . . tonight is supposed to be about the seniors, about the end of their high school era. EvenIfeel slightly out of place here, but as Jason’s girlfriend of almosttwo years, I’m intertwined with his life enough to warrant the right.

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