Page 47 of Because You Loved Me

As a rule,Asher typically avoided difficult or serious conversations with women. After all, he’d meant it when he’d told Noa he wasn’t interested in dating or any of the things that came with it, and that definitely included intense conversations of any kind.

But he wanted to know her story. Especially because there seemed to be such a contrast between the woman he saw with what was going on in her personal life.

He held his hand on her leg, and it didn’t take long for him to feel her relax under his touch.

“What happened?” She repeated the question and gave him a sad smile. “They died and everything changed.”

Of all the things he’d expected her to say, he wouldn’t have guessed that. Before he could askwhohad died, she continued talking.

“Not only were our parents best friends, and Ryan and I, but our older siblings, too. But they were more than friends. Tom was my older brother, and Olivia was Ryan’s sister.”

Was.

Asher watched Noa carefully as the pieces of her story started to come together.

“They were so in love.” There was a faraway look in her eyes, and she looked past him into the burning fire. “I think they fell in love as babies, if I’m being honest. They were just always so perfect for each other. So when they announced their engagement, no one was really surprised at all. Our families were so excited, and I’m sure both of our mothers were already imagining the house full of all the grandbabies they were going to have.”

She looked at him and smiled a little. “Ryan and I thought it was great, too. By then, we’d tried dating a little bit but there really wasn’t much chemistry between us, so we decided to stay friends, which worked for both of us because, even at that point, I knew I didn’t want to get married like Tom and Olivia. I’ve always wanted to travel and see the world. I knew I wanted to be a lawyer; that was my choice. But my plan was going to be working in family law, and maybe taking some pro bono cases for women who needed help leaving desperate situations.”

“That sounds like a good plan.”

“Right?” Her face changed. “And then, two years ago, on New Year’s Eve, they died.”

She said it so matter-of-factly that it took Asher a moment to register the words.

“They were hit by a drunk driver and killed instantly.”

“Holy shit, Noa.” He moved so he could pull her into his arms, wrapping himself around her from behind. “That’s awful.”

She sank backward into him and let her head drop back to his chest. “It was.” Her voice was soft, almost a whisper. “The sadness was almost suffocating. It was unbearable. And then, one day, I made an offhanded comment to Ryan about how we should just get married to see them all smile again. And…”

“The rest is history, as they say?”

She nodded. “Maybe it was crazy, but it started to sound like a good idea. We talked about all the logistics and what it would mean to have an open relationship, even if it was secret.”

“Open relationship?”

“Like I said, we didn’t have any chemistry.” She shrugged, as if it were no big deal. “Not like that. Although Ryan offered to…anyway, I could think of a lot of things a lot worse than marrying my best friend.”

“Even if you didn’t love him.”

“Right. After all, I never wanted to get married anyway, so what was the harm? And then when we told them…Asher, you should have seen their faces.” She twisted in his arms to look at him. “We knew then that wehadto do it. They were all so happy. It was like the first time since Tom and Olivia died that they felt anything other than sadness, and we’d done that for them. It felt…well, it felt right.”

“Until it didn’t.”

She nodded. “Until it didn’t.” Noa exhaled slowly and turned back to face the fire. “I can’t even think about how upset they all are right now.” She shook her head slowly. “Not Ryan. He’ll be fine. But Mom and Dad, and Jeannie and Brad.” She fell quiet for a moment. “I’m a terrible person.”

“What?” Asher jumped up and moved, so he was in front of her. He took her hands in his and held them. “Are you kidding me? How can you sit there and tell me that you’re willing to sacrifice yourself for your family and think for even the slightest moment that you’re a terrible person? It’s okay to look after yourself, too. And holy shit, woman. Marrying a man just to put a smile on your parents’ faces…damn. That’s as unselfish as it gets.”

Over the last few days, Asher had thought of a few possible explanations for why Noa had run from her wedding, but his imagination could never have written that particular story.

He handed her the glass of wine, and she drank deeply. “Does it make sense now?”

Asher chuckled but shook his head. “I think I have even more questions. But yes, I think I understand why you did what you did. I think you’re crazy, but I get it.”

He winked, and she laughed. After the story she’d just told him, it was a very welcome sound to hear again.

“I probably am a bit crazy.”

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