Page 67 of Because You Loved Me

When he woke hours later, the moon shone in the window and illuminated the room. Asher rolled and gently pulled Noa up against his chest in an attempt to hold onto everything that he knew was slipping away. The last week with her had been unlike anything he’d experienced before. It was unlike anything he’d everwantedto experience before.

He didn’t know how it had happened, or more importantly, how he could possibly hold onto it, but he did know that at some point yesterday after visiting the lodge, something had shifted between them.

He inhaled deeply and nuzzled into her neck, filling his senses with the scent of her. He needed to memorize everything he could. When the sun came up, things would be different. He didn’t know how he knew it. Only that he did.

“Asher?” Noa wiggled in his arms, but he held her tight.

“You’re awake.”

“I am.” Her voice was still heavy with sleep. “Why? It must be late.”

“I just…” He stopped himself and went with the truth. “I didn’t want to miss anything.”

She managed to turn so she faced him. Asher draped his arm over her hip. “What did you think you’d miss in the middle of the night?”

“This.” He let his fingers lazily trace the curves of her body. “All of this.”

The smile slipped from her pretty face. She reached for his face. Asher closed his eyes as Noa took her turn memorizing parts of him. He knew it was goodbye. It had to be. There was no other way forward. She was going to go and marry Ryan because they were meant to be together, and that was that. There was nothing he could do about it. No matter what he was feeling.

“Asher?”

He swallowed hard and exhaled slowly before he opened his eyes.

“What are you thinking?”

Even in the dim light, Asher could see that her eyes held a storm of emotions.

He reached for her hand and laced his fingers through hers. More than anything, he wanted to tell her exactly how he felt. He wanted to tell her that the last week he’d spent with her had been the best of his life. That never before had he connected with a woman the way he’d connected with her. He wanted to hold her in his arms and let her know that the thought of her walking away from him was unbearable and despite his best efforts, he couldn’t begin to imagine what a life without her would look like.

He wanted to tell her how thankful he was that she had jumped into his truck on what was probably the worst day of his life and turned it into the best one. How he’d been able to forget about his worries, and the fact that, without his work, he had nothing andwasnothing because when she was near, somehow it felt like he had everything.

But he couldn’t. It wasn’t fair. Much to his surprise, he cared about her too much.

“I met Ryan.”

“What?” The shock registered on her face at the same moment she tried to pull away but Asher held her hand tight in his. “Youmethim?”

“I bought him a beer.”

She blinked hard. “You…were you going to tell me this?”

“I’m telling you now.”

His chest ached, but there was no other way. He wasn’t stupid enough to thinkthis—whatever it was—could go on forever. It had already gone on too long. He never should have let things get carried away.

She squeezed her eyes shut, and it took all his self-control not to pull her close and kiss away the doubt and confusion that she must be feeling.

Instead, he waited, and when she opened her eyes again, he could see things had changed. Gone was the raw vulnerability of a few minutes ago. She was steeled for what was to come.

She knew.

* * *

For a few minutes when she’d first woken in his arms, Noa had let herself believe that things were going to be okay. That the shift she’d felt in him last night had only been in her own overactive imagination.

The entire drive back to the cabin, she’d been lost in her own muddled thoughts. Maybe she should have tried to talk to him about what she was feeling. About how crazy it was, but how she felt in her gut that there was something between them. Maybe she should have told him that when she thought about leaving him and the cabin, it ripped her heart out in a way that she’d never felt before. That she couldn’t swallow down the lump in her throat.

But instead, exhausted by a flood of emotion, she’d fallen asleep.

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