Page 11 of Light

For a second I think better of what I'm doing. I'm not a fighter. Maybe I should just go back inside and call the cops. ]

No, if I have to wait for the cops to come I'll be waiting until the sun comes up. They don't come in this area very much.

Gathering another bit of courage I continue slowly making my way around the side of my house. I don't blink in fear that I might miss something that could save my life. I don't call out or make any noise. If someone is there I want to catch them by surprise.

Slowly I make my way to the side of the house where I initially heard the sound and peer into the space.

One second my adrenaline is running rampant and I'm gearing up for the fight of a lifetime and in the next I feel like a fool. There's no one here.

It must have just been an animal or more likely just my overly tired brain playing tricks on me.

I drop the knife to my side, my fingers tingle with the feel of it in my hand.

"Get a grip, Liss." I hiss to myself. Tossing my head back I take a long deep breath in through my nose before I can even finish my eyes pop back open and I look in the direction of the window.

That smell. Cigarettes.

I walk deeper into the narrow area on the side of my house and look around.

Cigarette ashes liter the ground and the window sil.

"No, no, no!" I whisper shout into the night air. This shouldn't be here. I cleaned this away this morning. The only way there would be more ashes here is if someone else came back and put them here.

I turn in a big circle, my grip on the knife in my hand getting tighter once again. I don't see anyone here, but there's no question about it, someone was here tonight.

Someone was here watching me...and Tyler.

Completely forgetting my need to stay quiet I dart back into the house, making sure to lock both locks of the back door before I rush into Tyler's room just to make sure he's safe.

I let out a cleansing breath when I see he's still sound asleep in his bed.

The gravity of the situation hits me like a ton of bricks. Someone could've broken in here and hurt him.

Deke knows how much I love my son, and I'm sure whoever he sent over here tonight was meant to scare me into realizing that they are capable of taking the one thing away from me, I can't bear to lose. My child.

My mind swims with all the possibilities of everything that could've gone wrong tonight. This could've been more than someone just trying to scare me.

I'm done being scared. Done being on the victim end of this narrative. It's time for me to take matters into my own hands.

I run a hand over my face and steady myself. Keeping just as quiet as I was when I was outside I walk out of my son's room and into the living room where my laptop is resting on the coffee table. Trading the knife for the computer, I open up the screen and get to googling.

My fingers fly across the keyboard and I do my best trying to find the best ways to protect myself. Of course there's the normal suggestions that I go to the cops and then there are options for classes I can take for self-defense and even a few rather outlandish options for magic spells I can use to ward off evil. None of those options are quick enough for me. I need something quick and deadly.

A gun.

I hate that I even have to look at it, but Deke isn't giving me much of a choice. I have to be able to protect myself and my son.

I scroll through the discussion boards and the obvious scam websites, trying to find the best way for me to get a gun quickly. I don't know if I have time to go through the licensing process. It's obvious that whoever is outside isn't going to wait for me to get the proper paperwork in order.

No, I need something quick. Now.

The google search seems to take me in circles and before I know it the sun is threatening to come up and I'm no closer to getting what I want. What I need.

I lean back against the couch, pushing the laptop off my legs and squeeze a hand over the bridge of my nose. I hate that I have to do this. Hate that I've been forced into this situation. If I knew then what I know now, I'd have found a different way to get the money I needed for Tyler.

With a sigh, I let my hands drop.

That's a lie.

---