Page 44 of Light

"But I didn’t. I told them it was all me. Said it was my idea. Took a plea deal and did three years for it."

My stomach twists painfully.

"Did you ever hear from her?" I ask softly, even though I already know the answer from the dead look in his eyes.

He shakes his head once.

"Not a single call. Not a visit. Nothing. Turns out while I was rotting in a cell, she was living it up with some other guy. Some piece of shit she had been with the whole time. They used the info they stole to pull some kind of scam and make a quick buck. I was just the idiot who did the dirty work."

I sit there, stunned, feeling the bitterness rolling off him in thick waves.

"I gave up my freedom for a woman who never loved me," he says, voice raw. "Whole relationship was a goddamn lie."

Silence settles between us, thick and heavy.

I slide my hand from his arm to his hand, lacing my fingers with his gently.

Light tenses at first like he is not sure if he deserves even that small kindness.

Then slowly, he lets out a long breath and relaxes into it.

"You are not that same man," I whisper. "You are not that mistake."

His fingers tighten around mine, just slightly, like he is afraid if he lets go, the moment will shatter.

For a second, it feels like the only two people in the world are me and him, connected by more than just touch.

Before the tension can get any thicker he pulls his hand away and combs it through his hair. "Yeah, still that shit is on my record. I'm always going to be an ex-con. Always going to be one of the bad guys. I'll never get away from that mistake. All because I trusted a woman to be real with me. Trusted her to take care of me the same way I was willing to take care of her. I'm not going down that road again."

The more he talks the more I can feel the dread building up inside of me. Even though I previously told myself that I didn't want anything with Light, to hear him say without a doubt that there will never be anything between us is hurtful. He is holding a grudge against my entire gender because of what one women did to him. "You do realize, not all women are like that. What Alisha did was fucked up, no doubt, but that doesn't mean every woman is out to do the same things. You deserve..." I lean closer and grab his hand again so he can feel the words I'm about to say, "You deserve a woman to care and love you. Someone who will worry about you and keep you safe. You try to hide it but I see through the overly flirtatious puns and the cocky attitude, you're a good man Light. You deserve happiness too."

When did he get closer to me? A second ago we were on opposite sides of the small couch and now he's inches away from my face again.

Kiss me!

Do it, please!

My mind screams and I hold my breath waiting for him to make the move.

A cough from Tyler's room shatters the moment. Light blinks a few times, shakes his head and pulls away. "I'll get the sheets from the closet. You should get some sleep." He stands and walks away leaving me on the couch breathless and just a little embarrassed.

He's right. I know he is. We don't need to jump into anything together. Neither of us are in the right state of mind to start a relationship. With a sigh, I get up and walk over to Tyler's room.

I push open the door, lean against the jam and watch Tyler as he sleeps. He coughs again but doesn't wake. My eyes settle on the rise and fall of his chest. It's a little faster than usual. His breathing a little rougher than I'd like.

No, Light is right. I can't fall for him. Not now.

Because if I fall for him, I'm not sure I'll survive the landing.

Twelve

Light

Nothing like clubbusiness to bring my mind back to the present.

My bike engine roars beneath me, vibrating through my bones, loud enough to drown out every damn thought in my head.

The highway stretches ahead, long and endless, disappearing into the pink smear of a dying sunset.

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